Coffee and chat.

Had a very pleasant few hours sitting with Nerdy Girl, drinking coffee and eating donuts this morning. And, I'm not gonna lie, my seat gave me an optimal view of the people walking past the coffee shop, many of whom were attractive ladies in leggings, despite the low temperatures.

We discussed our relative Christmas breaks (hers was busy, mine was not), she showed me some pictures of her friends (tall, blonde and attractive) and promised to introduce me to her girlfriend soon. They've been dating for around 18 months and I think she was only introduced to NG's family and friends this holiday season.

Very pleasant. And might just stave off the disappointment that I'll undoubtedly feel on Monday of having wasted my time off  because I haven't seen the people I wanted to see (specifically KfW2).

Planning ahead.

I think the loneliness is really kicking in at the moment. There are some social things happening soon, though not all of them are going to be "meeting new people" events. There is a pub quiz and a work thing, though the work thing will probably be spent most just bantering with Quiet Girl. I've not seen anyone at work in a long time who has piqued genuine interest.

There is, of course, Quiet Girl's friend, though I don't know if she's going to be in attendance this year nor can I say for certain that her interest was real, or if it was a drunken dream that masqueraded as a memory. And I don't know if I'm intrigued because of the uncertainty or if I am genuinely interested. I don't think I am. At least not in dating. Maybe something physical/casual? I don't know.

August is looking very quiet. I have extremely tentative plans with KfW2, but that's it, and I can't arrange anything until she comes home from holidays at the end of the month.

Hmmm...

I don't think that picture in yesterday's post has done me any favours. It's not that I'm now pining after Recruitment Bird, but it has kicked off quite strong feelings of loneliness and a memory of meeting a couple of girls in the pub around the time of RB where I admitted I'd recently met someone and was hopefully going to see her again.

"Oh, I love that feeling!" exclaimed one of the girls. 

And that's kinda what I'm feeling right now. I want that feeling. I want to meet someone, to be attracted to them, to be excited by them. I've not felt that in years. I know Chloe and Quiet Girl's friend were reasonably recent, and that I've toyed with at least seeing if there was something physical but not really considered them dating material but I'm struggling to recall anyone who's properly excited me, probably since before Covid. And even then? CH? CB?

And that's depressing in itself.

To me, to you.

I was in one of my favourite bars last Friday evening with The Crowd. It was packed. It always is these days. Sadly the really cute barmaid wasn't working. GM actually mentioned her.

In the throng, a small group of really cute women squeezed past us. I think GM and I saw the same girl at the same time - a tall attractive brunette woman. We laughed. After a few seconds, she turned around and moved back the way she came. She and I did that dance where I tried to let her pass, but she stepped in the same direction, then we repeated that a few times before we both laughed and I stepped backwards and let her pass. As she squeezed past me, we clinked glasses, I wished her an enjoyable evening and returned to GM.

"How do you always talk to the cute ones?" asked GM incredulously.

This was news to me. GM is a babe magnet. Genuinely. Women approach him all the time. I don't recall that this is something that people would think of me - that I can strike up a conversation with anyone at any time.

I am a good double-act, though. I've chatted to my own fair share of women just by bouncing off people like M, FP and GM. Recruitment Bird is probably the best known on this blog, but there have been others that never led anywhere beyond a fun few hours chatting.

Denied.

I was at a family event yesterday, hosted by one of my cousins. We're close, actually, though not as close as she would be with my sister. Regardless, it was a celebration of sorts.

That's by the by. The reason for this post was a stunning blonde woman who turned up in this figure-hugging long dress. Now, I've repeatedly posted on this blog about how private I am, so the likelihood of making a move while my sister and cousin (and their kids) watched on was pretty much nil.

I did, though, manage to engineer an opening to have a chat with her. As I sat down, she crossed her legs and a slit on her long dress afforded me to also see that she was wearing knee-high boots. Oooft.

Sadly, it wasn't too long before any ideas I might have had or making a move were shot down. She was in a committed long-term relationship with a guy who was unable to attend. We chatted for around ten minutes before someone else came over to chat. I made my excuses and went back to my table.

I don't think my sister or cousin were any the wiser that I thought the blonde woman was cute, but I think the blonde herself knew I was sounding her out. I got several knowing looks and smiles until we left a few hours later.

Hello again.

D's wife posted something on Facebook (D is not actually a member) that reminded me of a girl that I had a crush on back in the day. It was complicated in that we were friends with a few guys who were in some bands. They really took it quite seriously and thought they had a real shot. They didn't really, but it was great going to see them in pubs.

I was introduced to this girl who was super cute and we chatted for ages.

The thing is, it turned out she was dating the drummer of this band. He was sound enough, but he also had real anger issues. They were massively on/off. Like really frequently. And yet she was really sweet. I don't think I was the only one in our friend group who had a crush on her.

I can't even remember how they drifted apart from the rest of us. Maybe D moved out of the shared house? I can't remember.

This would have been years ago, between the dalliance with FBS and meeting FA2.

But anyway, the girl in question posted a message on D's wife's Facebook earlier. I hadn't thought of her in years. We weren't friendly enough that I'd consider getting in contact again though, but a pleasant few minutes reminiscing about that period in my life.

Back to back.

It's not often I swipe right on women on Tinder. It's even rarer that I do it twice in a row. But tonight was one of those nights. Back to back swipes on... Attractive Neighbour and Sister's University Friend!

Now, don't get me wrong, Attractive Neighbour is an extremely attractive woman, and the little interaction I had with her was very positive in that she was easy to talk to, but I feel she's too high maintenance for me. She's all posh frocks and cocktails. I'm a bit more basic than that. Plus, I really don't think I'm her type.

Sister's University Friend looks like she might be a better match. I think she's more attractive. I think she's picky in her own way, but we do at least seem to share some hobbies and taste in pubs.

Surprise!

For only the second or third time that I can remember (and I've had the app installed since mid-2015), I got a match on Tinder-like online dating app Bumble. Brunette, cute, a few years younger. As it's Bumble, the ball is now in the girl's court to make contact.

She has 24 hours from 4PM today to make contact otherwise, we each disappear off each other's contact list.

Will she say anything? Find out tomorrow!

The older woman.

Years ago, I did some volunteering in my spare time. It started off as something I was doing for my Duke of Edinburgh award, but I enjoyed it that much that I continued to do it long after my obligation was over. It was at this volunteering that a few people commented on E3 and myself. 

Typically, I'd have conversations with people that would tend to go something like this:

"Are you two dating?"
"No, we're just friends from school"
"I think you should go on a date. You look good together."

One of the main contributors to this was a girl whose name I can't remember. She was a staff member at the place where I volunteered. We would banter off each other and I thought there might have been a bit of chemistry there. She was definitely attractive, brunette, great figure and had a wicked sense of humour. There was a running joke about her constantly going on dates.

There was another girl, from a completely different school - a stunning blonde - who was also volunteering at the same time. She too asked the questions about me and E3. However, she also asked the same questions about me and the brunette staff member.

Saying that, I was around 18 at the time. She (the brunette staff member) would have been about 22. I was in my last year of school, she'd been working in the real world for a while. Even if I had made a move, I would have been hopelessly out of my depth in terms of maturity, mentally and emotionally.

Fast forward a few years. I'm at a pub quiz, for a charity whose identity has been lost in the mists of time. As it happens, we're doing quite well, both in the quiz itself and some of the raffles. I can see a girl sitting at the side, who seems to be paying close attention to me. She seems vaguely familiar, but I cannot place her. It's frustrating because I have a good memory for faces.

Someone came back from the bar. Was it G? It might have been G, or BW.

"A girl at the bar asked me if you went to..." he named our school.

"Ah." I nodded. The penny had dropped. I explained to those with me how I thought I knew this girl, and how she tied in with the blonde girl. Of course, they all remembered the blonde girl, who we used to bump into during our frequent pub visits. I made sure that I went to the bar next.

As I had hoped, when I went to the bar, the brunette girl approached. Now that I saw her up close, it was definitely the same girl, and she was still attractive. We chatted as the barman poured my drinks. She asked after E3 and the blonde girl. I'd lost contact with them both at that stage. The barman arrived with my drinks and I paid him.

"We should go for a drink sometime," I suggested.

The brunette agreed, though I didn't sense that she was actually that excited about it.

"I need to get these back to the guys. Give me a shout." I told her my number.

"I'll never remember that," she laughed.

I went back to the table. Everyone was interested in what we chatted about. I explained. I also admitted that I'd given her my number.

"She'll never use it," someone suggested. "You shoulda gotten hers!"

I was more than a little tipsy at this stage and quite proud of myself for at least giving someone my number and being somewhat pro-active about it, so I wasn't too bothered. Towards the end of the evening, I saw her party gather their coats. They looked like they were leaving. Brunette girl was the last to leave. She beckoned me over and handed me a piece of paper.

"I can't remember your number. Here's mine." And off she went.

I phoned her a few days later and we did meet for a drink, that turned into a date, that turned into another date. We did get physical, though things kinda drifted apart shortly after that. I was keen to take it further, but she wasn't, though I can't remember why, or even if I got a reason.

I had completely forgotten about this girl. However, now that I've posted about her, guess who I think I saw over the weekend?

Sabotage.

In my last post, I mentioned meeting a girl, establishing that she's interested, then not sealing the deal with a date or phone number or whatever, only to get a second chance quite through luck. When I was in my 20s, that happened a LOT. And I never seemed to learn my lesson. CAB was a prime example - at the back of my mind, I knew she was interested, and we had the opportunity to hook up the first night we met, but I brushed it off 'til we shared a taxi home (with BW and her friend) and she kissed me as she got out. Then, the next night, chatting to BW and CAB's friend, I suggested I'd like to see her again and that kicked off me dating CAB.

I think I've also posted before about not being willing to believe that someone was interested in my at a non-platonic level, so would "test" that theory to the point where the other party would give up chasing, or the night would end before anything could happen.

I really did seem to sabotage my own dating prospects at times. I didn't even have to be in my twenties. I did the same thing with RB and it was only a chance meeting on the pavement as she was waiting for a taxi that "saved" that night.

Woke up this morning...

I woke this morning after a dreamless sleep (or at least dreams that I can't remember) but remembered a girl that I went on a couple of dates with. We met one night when I was out with FP and BW. BW got talking to a group of girls and then FP and I joined in. I'm struggling to even put a date on it. I think she might have been the first girl to pique my interest after FA2. Or was it pre-FA2? I think it was early in the year. February or March, maybe?

As the night goes on, it's clear that one of them is into me. 

And that feeling was reciprocated.

Things were going well until the end of the night when we suddenly went our separate ways. Well, her group of friends went to get a taxi, as did FP, BW and myself. She gave me a brief kiss on the way out the door, and that was it.

A few weeks later, I was at my local shopping centre, looking for a pair of scissors, I think. That's when I saw her, in a shop window. She mentioned working in the shop, but that had passed me by. I decided to see if I could get to talk to her, so I pottered around the shop trying to catch her eye, but she had disappeared. As it happened, I managed to find a pair of scissors, so I grabbed them and took them to the till.

I would ask you to guess who appeared behind the till, just as I arrived, but it would be a wasted question. There weren't too many other people in the shop, so we were able to chat. She still seemed keen, and I was still interested, so I asked her for a drink. She said "Yes" and scribbled her phone number on the back of my receipt and off I went.

We ended up going on some dates, but barring the physical attraction, there wasn't an awful lot to work with. There was an age difference too. She was working in the shop part-time while she went to university. I was older than her. We just weren't clicking at that level and we both recognised that.

I can't even remember her name, and though I can't remember exactly what she looked like, looking back, I think she kinda had this Cristin Milioti/Kate Mara/Anna Kendrick/Quiet Girl vibe going on.

Out of the blue.

I made a post last week about cute women doing physical stuff - sports, rambling, that kind of thing - and a desire to meet someone like that. Well, that turned into a dream last night where I went hill walking with my sister's really cute friend. At this stage, this was just a walk, chatting, getting to know each other. It was late autumn or early winter - cold, though no snow or anything.

However, when we came home, then things turned sexual. She asked for a massage due to walking for miles up and down massive hills and when I agreed to do so, she stripped to her underwear, displaying an amazing, toned body.

As the massage ended and started turning into foreplay, this was when I woke up.

I've always found the cute uni friend to be attractive, but we don't know each other, we've never spoken beyond saying "hi" to each other when she's visited my sister and we both lived with our parents. I've swiped right on her Tinder profile numerous times (she pops up once a month or so), though we've never matched (and my privacy obsession means I don't know what I'd do if we did match). And, to be honest, despite the toned physique, I'm getting a gf crush vibe off her, like I did with CB rather than anything lusty, so her appearance in that dream, in that way last night is somewhat confusing.

And frustrating.

Ooooh.

"She has a great figure" whispered KfW2 conspiratorially to me earlier.

I looked about, initially confused as to whom she was referring. It was one of CC's friends. I'd actually heard KfW2 make this comment before.

What she meant was:

"She's got a great rack"

At least, that's what I thought she meant. The girl in question did have big boobs. But a great body? I'm not sure I would agree.

IMO. KfW2 has a great figure. In my mind, that means that it all ties in together, in proportion, without one aspect being too big or too small. For example, RB had a great body, though she was much slimmer than KfW2 and not as tall... petite actually, but it was all in proportion.

I nodded my agreement, but really I was already drifting off into a daydream of women I know with great figures.

Just wondering.

I can't say that there are a lot, if any, advantages of being semi-active on online dating sites and apps for a prolonged period of time. Actually, just the apps... it's been a long time since I had a member ship of PoF or Match.com.

However, as I may have said in previous posts, there are some faces that do pop up again on a semi-regular or infrequent basis - my sister's athletic, hot, school friend, a couple of local semi-celebrities and others.

Sometimes, when bored, I wonder why they keep popping up. There's one girl who pops up in my feed probably twice a week (when I am more active). How does she do this? You need to reset your account, I believe, to show up again. Why does she do this?

Another girl who seems to pop up every now and again is this cute, blonde girl with a good figure who's only a year or so younger than I am. We've never matched sadly (I always swipe right), but she tends to disappear for a while - presumably dating - before re-appearing. And repeat.

I'd not seen this girl probably for a year and a half at least, when she popped up on my Tinder feed again... this time her profile was slightly different.

She still likes playing pool, but her time is now limited due to there being a one year old to look after.

Active on dating sites roughly eighteen months ago... goes off the radar... reappears with a one year old. Certainly gives you* something to ponder.

*Well, me. It gives me something to ponder.

Close but no cigar.

A new feature in Tinder seems to be to give you a free shot at seeing who has swiped right on you. I don;t know if this is something that is available to all members or just those who don't get any matches.

Anyway, the screen popped up today - choose one of four people who have swiped on me. You don't see these people until you pick one.

JACKPOT!

Well, kinda. Not any of the ones I've seen previously and liked (e.g. the two minor celebrities) but an extremely attractive brunette nonetheless.She seems interesting and is around my age.  I've not seen her on Tinder before.

Then it become obvious why.

She is 5432 km away. The puts her around Washington, DC or Toronto. Bugger.

Baby got back.

Years ago, in a conversation with USHW, I admitted a fondness for the female back. I don't know where it came from. The only other time I ever admitted anything about it was to A and she semi-teased me for ages about it. The first time I remember thinking about it in terms of a real-life turn-on was QC3's outfit at D's wedding. QC3 was, back in the day, slim and very toned - six-pack and everything.

I had, previously, loved stroking my partners' backs when we were cuddling and stuff, but it had never been a visual thing until QC3 that I can remember. And it was never anything I'd shared, except with A and then USHW.

And so I was surfing Bumble today (an online dating app like Tinder) and there was a photo of someone in my catchment area showing off an impressive back. Of course, I swiped right.

At first sight

I've often posted about how I've struggled with online dating... how it's difficult to be attracted to a lot of women, that I don't form connections based on some text and a couple of photos. Even out and about, socially, it's rare that a woman will grab my attention.

Of course, there are exceptions. Offhand, I can think of at least five women where I've immediately wanted to get to know them better.

The one recognisable name is CB. As soon as I saw her profile on Match.com, I knew I wanted to meet her. She had a few cute photos and an interesting profile.

The others were people I saw in real life. And while the CB attraction was very much of the girlfriend type, the other four are 100% just sheer lust.

The earliest was a girl I met at a party who was probably about five years younger than I was. It turns out that we knew each other, but I hadn't seen her in ten years. I was in my mid-teens at the time we knew each other initially. I would have been early 20s, and she late teens when we re-connected. And the attraction was immediate and strong and I'm pretty certain not reciprocated. We ended up chatting all night long as I tried to gauge any interest levels, but they were non-existent. We parted company at the end of the night, never to meet again.

The next was in 2006. In fact, I blogged about it at the time. Here's the post.

The next two are weird. They're both barmaids in one of my favourite pubs in the city and they look alike - so much so, I actually thought they were sisters. I may have posted about the younger of the two before - we've actually had a bit of fun at a friend's expense. I still see them both - they still take occasional shifts in the pub and they recognise me as being a semi-regular, but neither of them know my name and we've only ever had very short chats.

Double take.

I've often commented how, at certain times, the lovely Alison Brie resembles CH. And she does - at least at times when she gives a certain smile.

Like this:

Or this:

Especially in that last photo. I think it's a combo of the smile and hairstyle (CH's was worn slightly shorter, but was essentially the same thing).

But fuck me, if this didn't pop up on the internet today, another picture of Alison Brie, this time being a spitting image of QC2:

[Note: This is not the picture in question. It disappeared in the great image purge of 2023. Suffice it to say that AB's resemblance to CH has lessened over the years from her Community days, presumably due to ageing and her embracing of fitness, which has meant some weight loss, and these days she's more likely to resemble QC2, which in itself is not a bad thing seeing as I had a crush on both women.]

I don't know how interested you are in how much Alison Brie looks like ex-crushes of mine, but any excuse to post a picture or two of a good-looking woman.

What?

Years ago, until I was in my mid-teens, my parents owned a holiday home down by the coast. That's where I first met D. To justify the rather high cost of the holiday home, my parents would take us down there every chance they got - weekends, school holidays (in season). It's where I was lucky enough to meet a young lady called Sharon - my first real girlfriend.

I always had mixed feelings about the holiday home. It was nice to get away for a change of scenery, but I was always worried about leaving my "proper" friends behind for prolonged periods. Ultimately, it never worked out negatively and I consider myself lucky to have two groups of friends - my school friends and my holiday friends. In fact, my relationship with the holiday friends was different. There was less pressure to conform, less judgement. The age ranges were wider as well, often hanging out with people several years older or younger.

There was a family who owned the house opposite with two daughters, both around my age. I was friendly with them, but they were rarely at their holiday home at the same time as we were. The youngest, for the sake of this story, was called Adrienne.

Inexplicably one year, despite not having seen Adrienne in months, near the end of the summer I got it into my head that a) she would join my school at the start of term and b) I was attracted to her.

I was absolutely convinced of the first part, so much so that I was disappointed when the first day of school rolled round and she wasn't introduced to the class.

I have zero idea why that popped into my head this afternoon.

Quick one.

I got a somewhat last-minute text from G asking if I wanted to go to the pub. He was in town for a couple of days. I replied in the affirmative. I had no plans. So we met in my local favourite (the CB pub) to catch up.

Sadly, we weren't out for very long - just over a couple of hours - before G called it a night. But I had a good time, decent chat/catch-up and managed to catch a glimpse of the aloof blonde girl that I've posted about before.

I still can't figure out if she's married, but she seems rather closed off any time I've seen her.

But, it's pretty safe to say that the CB pub is her local and she's there most Saturday nights.