About last night... (again)

A few weeks ago during one of my phases of surfing the online dating apps, I saw a profile that set something off. I knew that I recognised her, but I couldn't put my finger on where or how. The pictures gave off vague Nigella Lawson vibes. I stared at the pictures for a while, and the name definitely rang a bell, but the details eluded me.

I closed the app and went about my day. As sometimes happens, that train of thought ticked away in my subconscious and the answer popped into my head an hour or so later: she was FBS's husband's business partner. I don't think I'd ever met her, but I'd seen plenty of photos of their business online and some TV clips, too.

So, randomly, in the taxi home last night, FBS started talking about her. I admitted that I'd seen her on Tinder which strangely never drew any comments from either D or FBS herself.  But the conversation had changed from FBS sharing stories of a woman's disastrous online dating experiences to something else. A slight tonal shift but a shift nonetheless. FBS was describing the horrible time she'd had on Tinder and something else... was FBS trying to set me up with her or something?

She never said anything outright and I'd never offered my opinion on her as someone I'd like to date (attractive, but has kids and lives too far away for me). So by the time that D and I stepped out of the taxi, the moment was gone.

About last night...

It was a great night in the pub with FBS, D, Friction Guy and Opinionated Guy. I wasn't as drunk as I had feared, though I was still quite drunk. While I always enjoy our catchups, it felt like we laughed more last night than normal, though for no real reason. Age is catching up with us and so our health was the main topic of conversation. Out of the five of us, I am the only one not on regular medication.

FBS asked a guy sitting at the next table to take a picture of us, and I think it might actually be a decent one. I might ask her for a copy of it and see if it's any good. 

Let's go!

The chat about tomorrow night is ramping up. I wouldn't say that it's getting outrageous in terms of planning or anything, but it does feel like everyone's low-key excited to be meeting up.

FBS has posted several messages over the last few days about it and the latest, arriving just now, is a picture of her with a beer in her hand.

"Practising for tomorrow night!" 

In a conversation with USHW recently, I shared that my ability to drink had taken a real beating: weight loss and lack of socialising (i.e. pub time) had "ruined me". Only a few years ago, I'd happily drink half a dozen pints on a Wednesday night and not give it a second thought.

Now, on a night out with FBS, D etc. I reckon I drink about half a dozen drinks, and I am far too drunk. I don't like being drunk. I like having drinks. I like being tipsy. But not being drunk.

But I'm still looking  forward to it.

Three's a crowd?

The chat in the WhatsApp group with D, FBS etc, has kicked off ahead of our proposed night out this coming Friday. Not a lot has been said, apart from D, FBS and myself all confirming that we're going out. Nothing from Friction Guy as yet, but to be honest, I think that we could make a night of it even if it's only the three of us. And I think if the other two can't attend, we would actually head out.

That'd be quite a good night out, I think. I recall the night where it was only me, FBS and Opinionated Guy and it was great.

Sharing.

A few weeks ago, I shared some details of my family thing with Nerdy Girl. She immediately offered to go out on the lash.

"Not now, but I'll take you up on that in a few weeks time." 

And I did. I suggested we head out last night, to CB Pub. And that was the plan until I was just about to leave the house.

"Can we do pool instead?"

I wasn't really in the mood. I wasn't actually interested in going out on the lash either, but I did want to get out of the house, have some company and a couple of drinks and chat about stuff. But I wasn't going to make a song and dance out of it.

"Yeah, could do a couple of games"

And it was quite pleasant. We played pool for a couple of hours before NG decided she'd had enough, then we adjourned to CB Pub, which was only about a minute's walk away from where we were playing pool.

And we chatted for another couple of hours.

However, it wasn't until we were on our way home that it turned out that NG didn't know how the family thing had turned out. She was under the assumption that things were just the same as I'd reported a few weeks back. 

While you could argue that she should have realised, in reality, it was on me. I didn't share the news with her. I'm pretty sure there are some people that I should have shared with directly, but I relied on a Facebook post, and I don't think that reached as many people as I would have liked. 

I know that while FBS and Opinionated Guy are active on Facebook, she was unaware of the news, so she didn't share with D or Friction Guy. The same applied to GM and The Crowd.

Regardless, it was a pleasant night. Nerdy Girl is always good company.

House of Fun

I've done stage 1 of the carpet shopping. On the way there, I took a minor detour past one of FBS's old houses. The one she lived in when we had our brief thing. It brought back some very fond memories. Fond x-rated memories.

And now I need a cold shower. 

Get out.

It's only been a week and a bit since I was meant to do dinner and drinks with KfW2. The recent night out with G has given me a taste for... something. I would try with KfW2 to rearrange something... and I will... but she's unlikely to have any free time until near the end of November.

There's a potential work night out at the end of this month, but that's 4 weeks away. I have a definite night out with D, FBS and Friction Guy in three weeks time.

That's the kind of thing that I'm craving - a night out with friends somewhere that I don't usually go. Interaction with strangers, too. That's what I got with G on Saturday.

I think it ties into the whole loneliness thing from last week, too. 

Talk back.

I did send out the messages to The Crowd and D, FBS etc. and got the messages back that I'd expected. I think GM said that he'd call round to see me. On a side note, while I've spoken to KfW2 a couple of times, I'm a little sad she hasn't actually visited.

I will see her tomorrow, albeit only for a few minutes, but it'll be great to see her.  

D'oh!

I was chatting to KfW2 earlier and I realised that I needed to share some news with The Crowd and D, FBS etc. So I've fired off a quick WhatsApp message to all of them, to keep them updated.

Free failing.

Another recurring dream of mine last night: that I'd failed my university exams. It's always university exams, never GCSEs or A-Levels. And the dream's always the same: I know I've failed them, I was totally under-prepared and I have to sit there while my peers celebrate their exams.

The relief when I wake and realise that my university years were 30 years ago and I'll likely never have to sit an actual exam ever again is palpable.

When I have recurring dreams like this, I always remember back to FBS's house. She had a book about understanding dreams. On her bedside cabinet? Beside the sofa in the living room? I can't recall the exact details.

Apparently a dream about failing exams usually means you feel anxious, stressed, or underprepared for a challenge in your waking life. 

Out and about.

FBS messaged last night. Not specifically to me, but in the group chat with D and Friction Guy. So we could potentially have a night out in October.

That means that before the end of October I could have about 4 nights out. Next Friday, I'm out with my sister at a pub quiz. the following week, I'm out with KfW2. Potentially there's a work night out at the end of September, and if not, a near-guaranteed one in October.

Plus this planned October night with FBS etc. 

I'm looking forward to them all. 

Urgh. FFS.

More poor quality sleep and a dream that felt more like a memory than anything else... purely because a lot of the dream did take place. It involved FBS and I having a slot of sex. And that was pretty much the dream.

In real life, we'd been to the pub, she'd asked me back to hers afterwards, we'd kissed on the sofa which escalated, she asked me to stay, I agreed, we went to bed, fucked, fell asleep and spent most of the next day in bed going through another couple of rounds. Late afternoon, I eventually left to go home, shower and change before heading out to the pub again. 

And that was pretty much the dream, except we were a lot more adventurous in the dream than we had been in real life.

Going back to the real life aspect of my memory/dream, we might have repeated the same feat that second evening, too. There was definitely a weekend where we did just have sex and go to the bar, but whether that's the night of this dream, I can't say. And because it was the middle of Winter - mid-January, I think - I don't think I saw daylight for nearly three days.

So not only am I still exhausted after nearly a week of rotten quality sleep, I'm now uncontrollably horny, too.  

Booty Time.

I'm pretty sure I've commented on this before, but back in the day, around the same time that I briefly hooked up with FBS, she would often wear a really nice pair of black OTK boots over her jeans.

They're also known as "fuck me boots" or, as FBS called them: "CFM boots" for "come, fuck me". I don't recall FBS wearing them in the three or so months we were doing our thing. She definitely never wore them any time we went back to her house for... fun. I definitely would have remembered that.

And while I do have fond memories of FBS wearing that combination of jeans and footwear, it wasn't a look I recall seeing other women wear... until I saw an Instagram post with this actress, Helen Flanagan. 

 

Suits you, sir.

A post made on Reddit asked how old was the oldest piece of clothing that people own. My record is 31 years: a t-shirt that I bought at a gig back in, I think, 1995. It's on its last legs, but there's a bit of sentimental value to it. It was a gig I was at with D and FBS and had a great time (this was long after my dalliance with FBS).

But I also have another t-shirt that's over 18 years old. This one doesn't really have sentimental value - I don't recall where or when I bought it - but I do remember that I wore it on my "proper" date with Recruitment Bird. Does getting handsy and making out with RB mean that I can attach sentimental value to a t-shirt? Maybe it does.

We're a few weeks away from it being the 18th anniversary of the start of the RB thing, but I think it's time that the t-shirt gets retired*

*binned. 

Oooft.

We had a team-building event yesterday that involved an escape room then a trip to the pub. I was drunk, dear Reader. The first time in a long time. I can't remember the last time I was properly drunk. Maybe the last time I was out with FBS and that crowd?

Anyway, it was a good night. I spent a while chatting to the tall woman that I've posted about a few times before. The one who might have made a drunken approach at a previous work event. I don't think she really remembers that.

I met a few other work people from other teams and offices and they were all really nice.

I could do with going back to bed, though. Drunk sleep + waking early means a very tired Ruuude.

Working the core.

D prompted FBS for some dates where we could go out, but it transpires that she's not available until the start of July, with travel plans and family commitments.

I messaged D separately and suggested if he wanted to meet for drinks, seeing as he's in town, I'd be more than happy to meet up. He said that Friction Guy was going to the same day time thing that D was, so there's a real possibility that he could also tag along.

Out of all of us who worked in the same place all those years ago: me, D, FBS, Friction Guy, QC2 and Opinionated Guy, I'd say that me, D and Friction Guy would be the core group (from my perspective). It'd be nice to head out, just the three of us. It must be 20 years since that happened.

Quick Digest

I did call KfW2 at lunch and we spent 20 mins or so, chatting. I think that's the the first time we've spoken since I was at her house about 2 months ago. Our calls and texts are getting more infrequent, and she doesn't really interact on social media any more (not that I am massively active on Facebook). I should follow up over the weekend see about getting her out properly for food and drinks.

I also did get the gardening done. Well, about 80% of it. I have some tidying up to do, but the equipment I need to do it is at my Dad's house. I'm meant to be heading over there tomorrow, so I could get the work done by the end of the weekend.

FBS has already replied to D's text message saying she's unavailable on the day that D's suggested for drinks, but she's not offered up any alternatives.

And finally, thanks to some guy in work who's been a massive PITA over the past few weeks, I have a work call to attend tomorrow morning at 4AM. FFS. These use to be fairly regular when I was in the same team as Stalky Guy, but in my current team, these are almost unheard of. 

Let's go!

D's just sent a message. Do we want to meet for drinks at the end of next month? I've checked my diary and I've got nothing on, so I've replied that I'd be interested.

Not quite right...

I can't remember if I've posted about this before, but I had a random memory earlier today about a Saturday afternoon spent with FBS and a few others in the pub. The night before, I had been at D's house, having beers and playing video games.

I seem to recall D making a point about FBS being out with BW and a few others and why I wasn't with them. D was one of the few people who knew that FBS and I had been fucking. I knew he knew. He knew that I knew he knew, but still, I never really admitted it to anyone.

So, the next day, I arrived at FBS's house, which we'd preplanned. We were meeting D and others in town. Why I was at FBS's and not D's, who only lived two streets over, and closer to my house is lost in the mists of time.

I knocked on the door and BW answered. I can't say I was surprised. I would say that 90% of the time BW went to a bar, he went with a plan to meet a girl. He didn't know about FBS and I, so to the best of his knowledge, FBS was available. I'm willing to bet that he'd tried it on. 

He had kipped on the sofa. FBS was nowhere to be seen. It was silent. I couldn't even tell if she was still asleep. But it was rapidly approaching lunchtime and I wanted to get into town, grab a bite somewhere and hit the pub.

While BW made himself presentable and tidied the sofa, I went upstairs and knocked on FBS's bedroom door.

"Are you awake?"

"Yes. C'mon in."

FBS was lying in bed.

"Get your arse out of bed. It's time to meet the rest."

It wasn't really. We had about an hour or so, but that allowed time for FBS to get ready, perhaps shower and get a bus into town.

"Yes, well, not with you watching. Turn around."

I'd forgotten that FBS had made two surprising claims about her sleeping habits. The first was that she didn't have a "side" of the bed. She just went to bed on whatever side was closest when she was ready. The other was that she slept naked. 

I'd already seen her naked at this point, but this was months after we'd last spent the night together. She wrapped herself in a dressing gown and opened her wardrobe.

"Is BW still downstairs?"

"Yeah."

"OK, I'll get ready. Go downstairs, I'll be 20 minutes."

The thing is, while I am 100% that this happened, some of the details of my memory feel off... not quite right. Like the night with D, playing video games, feels like it was the middle of winter, while the next day arriving at FBS's house feels like today: not quite spring, but dry, bright and just a little cold. Given our recent history and how it ended - I wouldn't say I ghosted FBS, but we didn't spend a lot of time alone once she admitted she wanted more than just casual sex - so me turning up at her house months after we last fucked and being cheeky enough to walk into her bedroom and demand she got out of bed also feels off.

Ah well, it's a pleasant memory nonetheless. 

HB FBS

It's FBS's birthday today. She's three years younger than I am. Back when we briefly fucked, she was a lot more wordly wise than I was. She'd moved out of her parent's house quite young. She had, by her own admission, gone through a rebellious streak. She didn't have a great relationship with her Dad. She'd taken a lot more drugs than I had. Her body count was much higher than mine. And she'd already been engaged.

But she was always positive and optimistic. It's the one thing I would say was her defining characteristic.

Anyway, I sent her a message earlier, wishing her a Happy Birthday.