Looking back.

So, 2022 was pretty eventful. Professionally, it started well but ended like a damp squib due to poor communication from my leadership. In almost all other aspects of life, things just... were. I'm still single, and the Chloe thing has just reignited the desire to meet someone. This evening's last-minute memory of the near misses with CB haven't helped.

I've also not broken the habit of the past few years of being isolated since the start of Covid, so that's one of my goals for this year... just to get out of the house a little bit more. As I posted earlier, I miss KfW2. We've barely seen each other this year, despite my best efforts, and I'm really disappointed that we're growing apart. She did invite me down to her house tonight, but I'm feeling very low energy. It's partly disappointment of The Crowd not going out tonight plus still getting over the lurgy from before Xmas.

However, all being said, I wish you a Happy New Year. I hope your 2023 is successful and happy, and that you achieve whatever you set out to do.

Random access memory.

For some reason, it popped into my head that tonight it's the 10th anniversary of seeing CB in the flesh (in CB Pub) for the second time. I spent ages with GM, GB and MF, trying to come up with a plan for approaching her, but we never came to a solution. By the time I had the courage to just go and talk to her, I was horrendously drunk, and I had my hands full with a pretty redhead.

While I don't often do regrets, or big regrets, I have to say that missing both chances of chatting to CB (on two consecutive New Year's Eves) is probably one of them.

Party time.

KfW2 sent a message asking if I was going to go to hers tonight. Despite not going out with The Crowd, I'm not going to go. I'm still trying to shift this pre-Xmas lurgy so am feeling a little sorry for myself and I don't want o be coughing and spluttering in someone else's house all night. It was a nice message though. She said she misses me and it would be amazing to see me. The feeling's mutual. After all, I did post recently suggesting we were growing apart, having not really seen each other this year and our phone conversations are usually snatched when she has a few minutes of free time.

Best laid plans.

Surprisingly, someone has replied to the message about going to the pub tonight. FC messaged to say that he, and his wife, have picked up an illness over the Christmas period. Nothing at all from GM or S. FP is working, so a long shot of trying to get him out tomorrow is now gone. We've tentatively agreed to meet next week. It feels like ages since we last had a few drinks and caught up with each other.

Communication breakdown.

Unsurprisingly, I've heard absolutely nothing from The Crowd about my proposal for heading out tomorrow night for a few drinks. I'm disappointed, but I'm not going to chase people up on this, but I think it'd be nice.

As I've often said, and no doubt it's been posted on this blog several times, I don't mind that they don't want to go out, but I do think that no reply at all from any of them is really fucking rude.

Textually speaking.

I met Nerdy Girl this morning and we ended up having a late breakfast rather than the coffee that I had suggested. We covered a lot of ground, conversationally, including my recent dealings with Chloe (I've given up on giving her a blog name). I explained that I didn't feel that there was a non-platonic connection and that her tactile nature was just because she was thankful that I'd rescued her from unwanted attention... and a little drunk. 

Nerdy Girl was of the opinion that I should text her. Meeting people, especially new friends, was never a bad thing, she explained. And she's right on that. Except, how do you text someone out of the blue, two weeks after you met them and you've only known them a few hours? Nerdy Girl didn't have an answer because she supposedly never gives out her phone number and only shares her social media. But, she pondered, she did give me her number, so that was tacit approval to use it?

Something to ponder.

Happy Birthday!

Blog favourite Alison Brie is 40 today!

Hello!

I've put out feelers for a night out with The Crowd if we're not doing New Year's Eve. Maybe Friday, I suggested. I only sent the message about an hour ago, and the people are often slow to reply, especially if they don't want to reply negatively.

I've also arranged coffee with Nerdy Girl tomorrow morning. It's time limited. She has places to be early tomorrow afternoon, but this works for me. It gets me out of the house, for starters, plus talking to someone.

Post Christmas Blues

I've done two days at my sister's as is the normal Ruuude tradition at this time of year. It's probably partly the remnants of this 'flu or Covid coupled with me being an introvert means I really appreciated my own space today. 

I'd usually start posting about New Year's Eve, trying to get The Crowd to commit to heading out, but it seems like that's a bust already. I had asked the question before Christmas, but they were more interested in arranging a New Year's Day hike than discussing NYE.

It doesn't look like FP will be available for any socialising. I might give Nerdy Girl a call to see if she wants to meet for coffee or something.

I've also had this nagging thought at the back of my mind that I might have, or should have, texted Chloe. more from a point of view that she wanted me to rather than me wanting to. I'll rephrase... I wouldn't have minded seeing her again purely from the perspective of meeting someone new and opening up new opportunities. It probably wouldn't have gone anywhere romantically - I think I've already posted about her age and child status which are likely deal-breakers. It's too late now, though.

Merry Christmas Everyone!

I know there aren't too many readers, but Merry Christmas to you all nonetheless. I hope you have a great festive period.

Summer Dreams.

I need cheering up, so here are some blog faves in swimsuits to take my breath away rather than the 'flu/COVID/cold that I got when I met Chloe.

Bah (cont'd)

Whatever it was that I caught last week is still hanging around. If it was C-19, I should be OK to do my Christmas stuff without worry of infection others having been isolated for an entire week now. I think the current advice is five days.

I think I'm on the other side of it. I am feeling better, but my throat is still giving me some grief and my nose is still blocked. The throat thing is the most annoying - it's a constant irritation. Some kind of infection of the uvula that feels like there's something stuck at the top of my throat. VERY annoying.

Bah!

Also, all day, I've felt that I have a sneeze on the way, but it just doesn't come. Now, I have been sneezing, but infrequently, and even when I do, the sensation of needing to sneeze does not go away.

Patient Zero (tolerance).

Urgh. I fucking hate being ill. I am not a good patient, even though there's no one to look after me. I'm grumpy and easily distracted and, when it comes to things like a cold, being congested and not being able to breathe through my nose is massively off-putting. 

I'm a little lucky that I've been off on annual leave over the past two days, but I am due back in the office tomorrow and I definitely won't be 100% recovered by then. I have two days of work to do until my Christmas holidays, but that'll be difficult if I am distracted by illness.

And so it begins (2022 edition).

I was feeling sorry for myself because of this lurgy, and with that was some thinking about KfW2. I saw on Facebook last week that KfW2 had been out with friends, at a bar, having a Christmas night out. Obviously, that made me a little downhearted. How long have I been trying to get KfW2 out for such a night, only to face apathy/lack of availability?

So it was surprising that she sent a text message last night to invite me down to her house for New Year's Eve. I don't know if I'll go down. I'd be stranded down there, plus there's still this thing where I always have to go down to hers rather than her coming up to mine. Plus, even if I do that, getting home on New Year's Day will be a disaster.

I still have an idea about getting S, GM or FC out for NYE to the CB Pub (or somewhere else local). We've not been out for NYE in a few years due to the Pandemic, so this might be a good opportunity to get out again. Plus with the interaction with Chloe (I need to give her a more accurate reference name), I've gotten the taste for going out again.

Sniff (Part 2)

As expected, S wasn't in contact to arrange whatever it was he had planned on Thursday night. Admittedly, that's typical of him. He probably can't remember half of what he talked about on Thursday. I barely remember what happened, and it was the most interesting night out I've had in years.

Still, my prediction from yesterday has come true: I am ill. It's just the cold, but I got zero sleep last night so the double whammy of no sleep plus the cold has had me in bad form all day. I just can't get comfortable.

I messaged FP to let him know there would be no beers tonight, and he was OK with that. Hopefully, I'll have kicked this to the kerb by midweek and get to arrange some pre-Xmas drinks with FP.

Sniff

In theory, I could be out again tomorrow night. It's been ages since I saw FP and we had tentatively agreed to see each other this weekend. S, too, was talking about going out tomorrow to watch the World Cup final. I've no real interest in that, but I'd not turn down a few drinks during the evening. Sunday night drinks can be relaxing.

However, I'm starting to feel a bit off. It feels like the beginning of a cold or a flu. I really hope it's not. I'd quite like to see FP (and maybe S) tomorrow.

Safety first... again.

I'll be honest, part of me half-expected, half-hoped that Chloe* would text, even if it was just checking to see if I was hungover. (I actually was, for the first time in ages.) Or repeating her thanks from the previous evening, only sober.

But the thing is, at over ten years younger than I am, and with at least 1 kid, she manages to have two of the (very limited) deal breakers that I have in potential dates. That is pretty much ruling out anything long-term, but I'd be happy to meet her again, just to learn how to talk to people again. She did seem fun and interesting.

*Still not her real name.

Safety first.

Urgh, my head.

I was out last night with FC, GM and S. Neither Mrs FC nor FP showed up. It was a great and interesting night. We ended up staying in our second bar, getting lucky with some seats. We discussed one of the bar staff - it was a cute girl that we'd had a history with when we used to go out regularly. It was surprising that she was still working at the same bar, though I've always suspected that she, and her older sister, were related to the bar owners.

Anyway, the interesting part of the evening was that I ended up "rescuing" an attractive blonde woman from some unwanted attention. Our paths had crossed all evening. She was originally being hit on by her boss's brother (I think it was a work night out), though I don't think she minded that and he really wasn't getting anywhere. He asked me how his date was going and I said that I really wasn't getting a date vibe off them.

We made small talk each time our paths crossed and she introduced herself and hugged me. That guy left though, and the next time I went to the bar she was talking to another guy.

We made eye contact and she immediately disengaged with the guy to give me another massive hug. I sensed something might be wrong.

"Do you need help?" I asked.

"Yes please!"

"I need to borrow Chloe* for a bit," I said to the guy and guided Chloe away to where GM and S were sitting (FC had gone home by this point). She settled immediately and chatted away with us until closing time.

We couldn't get a taxi, so I offered to ensure she got home safely. It was a choice between hanging around and possibly getting a taxi or walking home. We both live about an hour's walk from the bar in roughly the same direction. It was difficult to decide if there was a genuine connection or if it was just gratitude for making sure she was safe. Despite the fact that she was incredibly tactile, it didn't feel that it was going to lead anywhere. 

That was confirmed when she took a call as we were walking home from her Mum, who was also her babysitter. We parted ways around a third of the way home. She insisted that I text her to make sure I got home OK and we swapped numbers.

We did indeed swap a few text messages, confirming to each other that we made it home safely. And that was that. I doubt I'll text her, but let's see what happens if she texts. She did specifically ask me to save her number, though, so I am wondering.

*Not her real name

Party Season (cont'd)

Hopefully, I should be in the pub right about now with FC, GM and S. Possibly with Mrs FC and FP too, but I don't know right now.

So, have a pic of Alex Daddario in a little back dress with thigh-high boots and we'll pretend it's a prayer to the Christmas party gods that I meet someone like that tonight.

V impressive.

Oh, and seeing as V is in my head and I'm watching Argentina vs Croatia World Cup match on the TV, that reminded me that V claims triple allegiances when it comes to stuff like this. She's American, born and raised. But she claims both Argentinian and Italian heritage and is fairly close to both, as far as I can tell. I certainly remember her speaking both Spanish and Italian, if not fluently, then very well indeed.

Wonderland.

An old colleague of mine posted an update on Facebook. He's out eating at a Greek restaurant. As he's tagged the restaurant, Facebook posts a little map too. Something flashed up in my memory. I've been to a Greek place in that area. When? Then it hit me... it was Hallowe'en night many, many years ago. 

V had invited some of us out and when we showed up, she was looking both stunning and incredibly sexy in what I think was an Alice in Wonderland costume. Short dress, thigh-high stockings and there might have been pigtails involved. I might have blogged about this in the past, but mistakenly suggested it was Dorothy from Wizard of Oz or even Snow White,. but I feel these are incorrect.

My new colleagues knew I thought she was attractive though I had never any plans to make any move as we were only in the city for a short while, to do some training. It didn't stop them from trying to get us together at every opportunity though.

Not V:

Moody Tuesday.

I woke early this morning - 6 AM. I rolled over for another couple of hours of sleep and had a bit of a weird dream. It was all over the place, for starters, but there was a section that I do recall quite vividly. I was in the first house I lived in (as a kid). But KfW2 was there and QC2 lived next door. And for some reason, KfW2 went next door either to become friends with QC2 or to tell her about the massive crush that I had on her. I kinda woke up properly at that point, but the dream bemused me. 

Actually, I don't know if bemused is the right word but it certainly provoked some things. I miss KfW2. We are drifting apart and there's nothing I can to do stop that. To be fair, KfW2 is trying - she's the one initiating the phone calls these days while I'm texting. But she's not making herself available to meet up, face to face. I also miss QC2. While we were never massively close, I did enjoy the bi-annual drink and chat sessions. It gave me an outlet to offload some things, and get another female perspective. While I sometimes never covered what I always wanted to, meeting her never felt like a waste. And, as USHW was always fond of telling me, I'm a sucker for a pretty face, and I thought QC2 was attractive.

So, yeah, I'm in a decent, if slightly wistful, mood this morning.

Super.

I had a day off today, so after spending the morning shopping for Christmas, I spent the afternoon cocooned in front of the TV watching Black Adam starring Dwayne Johnson. It's a very middling superhero movie - reasonably enjoyable but instantly forgettable. But it did have Sarah Shahi in it, who I was introduced to in the excellent "Person of Interest" TV show from about a decade ago.

Raincheck.

I was meant to be going out with FP for a few pints and a catch-up. It's been ages since we last saw each other. Maybe a month or more. Definitely prior to G coming over for one of his flying visits and that was three weeks ago. I understand his reasons (Mrs FP has family stuff), so I might text him and invite him out on Thursday when I'm meeting FC, S and GM for a Christmas thing.

Rewind.

Facebook has reminded me that today is the anniversary of the night something weird happened with CH at our work Xmas party. She got very drunk and might have been attempting to initiate something, though GB was very protective.

There are times that I do still miss CH. I think that's more to do with the fact that she was attracted to me and the surreptitious touching rather than the friendship itself because it wasn't that great a friendship, was it? 

Oh, and it was also the night I danced with Quiet Girl, years before our paths would cross properly and we ended up on speaking terms/ as acquaintances. I must message her when I go back into work and see how she's getting on.

Party season.

 It's party season, so let's cheer Ruuude up with some of my favourites in black dresses, eh?

Here we go!

It was only yesterday, or maybe the day before, that I commented on the fact that The Crowd had been agreeable to the idea of a night out. Obviously, no one took control so, once again, it was up to me. Within half a dozen messages, we'd agreed to go out next Thursday and everyone was looking forward to it. A lot less stressful and work than with the other group.

It might be a good idea to get FP out too.

Shower thoughts.

What is it with Americans and their love of Adam Sandler? No one that I know is a fan (I'm in the UK), though people will admit to liking Happy Gilmore (and I'm a big fan of some of his female co-stars). 

V and some of her friends absolutely loved him and I spent an entire night being forced to watch several films that everyone, bar me, found hilarious. Admittedly we were not sober. 

I had a conversation with an American colleague yesterday and she was gushing with her praise. When I asked about his appeal, she seemed stuck for an answer.

Just shower thoughts for today, readers.

Just stuff

The demotivated mood continues. Just over three weeks to Xmas, only half the presents bought so far. No further socialising is on the horizon though The Crowd seem fairly keen on doing something, even if none of them will take the initiative. Plus I think it's S's birthday sometime soon, though he tends not to invite us out and prefers his OG friends.

So, to cheer me up, here are some pictures of Hayley Atwell.

About time!

We had our day out yesterday and despite KfW2 and Stalky Guy not turning up, it was still a great afternoon, catching up with old colleagues. We always got along great anyway, so our team was always social. Two guys left early-ish to catch the last bus. Two of us stayed on and it was quite late when I got back into the house. Well, 9 PM, which isn't late in itself, but when you consider that we'd met at 2 PM and had been boozing all afternoon, then I was very definitely not sober.

But it was a great afternoon and while I wouldn't say that it was worth the wait (this was our rescheduled event from this time last year), it was still a very enjoyable afternoon.

FFS

For the second time this year, I've just had a bit of a tooth fall off. This happened last night. It was, what, only 30 hours since I was at the dentist on fucking Thursday. So, it's not like earlier in the year when I was eating popcorn and an uncooked kernel caught me by surprise. This time? I was chewing some gum after a meal with some fairly potent garlic sauce. Was there no evidence that the tooth was showing stress or cracked? FFS. This is going to cost me to get fixed. I think I've used all of my insurance benefits for this year, too.

Sorry!

I've just sent Stalky Guy a message to say that I won't be going to the company-wide work event this evening. I don't know if he was relying on me for his own attendance, but I'm knackered. I had very little sleep last night, and what I did get was poor quality.

On the plus side, I have a long weekend, using up annual leave, and am meeting some people on Sunday afternoon for food and drinks.

Well, hello!

We had a work thing yesterday. Not the monthly company-wide thing that I've mentioned before, but specific to our team. My team is split over two cities, so half of them needed to travel to attend. And many of them did... only to leave at lunchtime and not participate in the fun stuff during the afternoon.

Anyway, that's by the by and not really the reason for this post. We ended up at the Christmas Market, had a few drinks then moved on to a decent bar just down the road, which was showing the World Cup matches.

I managed to get talking to this stunning-looking blonde woman. I don't think she was single, though she never mentioned anyone and there was no ring. Plus, a guy hovering nearby seemed a little protective or possessive of her. She never introduced us, so I'm guessing it's a work colleague who has the hots for her. I kinda recognise the signals from when I was that guy out socialising with QC2 and she was being hit on.

Anyway, recognising that I was probably too drunk and still not certain that she was single, I made my excuses and left.

But this morning, it brought a smile to my face. It's the first time I can remember in ages that I saw someone in real life that provoked something plus I also managed to get talking to her. And while I appreciate that I was drunk, I do remember this morning that she resembled AH, albeit much more attractive, with shoulder-length hair rather than the short 'do that AH typically sports.