Time flies.

Facebook threw up some memories today. GB had posted pictures from about 14 years ago and the very first picture is one of CH and myself looking very cosy together. I wouldn't say she was cuddling up to me, but we are very close.

It's also the first night I recall things not being entirely above board with regards to us being tactile, and what that might mean. Well, probably not the first night. I'm sure our chemistry was established by then, but I can't remember how tactile we were before the night in question. If I remember correctly there was at least 1 kiss that lasted too long and at least 1 incident where her hand was on my ass. I also recall getting quite a few text messages from CH because I was 15 minutes later than I had said I'd be there.

Oh, and separately, that was the night where CC admitted to having a crush on GM. Nothing ever came of that, though. At least not that I'm aware. 

House it going?

I was expecting to hear from CC today. She had mentioned that she wanted to go and look at kitchens and she knew a guy who did kitchens. As it happens, a new kitchen is the next phase of my house plan. I have a rough idea of what I want, from a functional perspective, but no idea about any of the bells and whistles.

So I know where I will put my oven, fridge, washing machine, sink and dishwasher, but I couldn't tell you what colour the kitchen will be, what the tiles will be like. And the only way I'll make those decisions is by going out and looking at kitchens.

So, yeah, I was expecting to hear from CC, but she's not said anything. Part of me is disappointed because I'd like to kick off this phase of the house renovation, but after about 5 pints last night, I'm feeling very lethargic today. 

Wrong end of the stick.

It was one of those frustrating meetings with CC: I tried to explain a minor dilemma, CC completely misunderstands what I am saying, decrees herself to be the expert and wonders why I am frustrated when she keeps mentioning something that has nothing to do with the problem I'm solving.

I have a potential issue with income tax, but CC keeps talking about capital gains tax. That's not exactly the issue, but that was the kind of conversation that we had. Every time I said that it wasn't a capital gains tax issue, she looks confused and tells me I'm wrong.

I've done the research. I know the problem in broad strokes. I know that my problem is minor, something that can be reduced with a bit of creative accounting but unlikely to be avoided.

And yet, CC still sees it all in black and white and still gets the wrong idea.

These types of meetings are less frequent than they used to be. I don't know if it's luck in avoiding topics where CC thinks she's an expert or I'm subconsciously avoiding them or if we're just better at talking about them, but there was definite frustration on both side this morning.

Tea for two.

CC's just messaged asking if I wanted to go for dinner tonight. I've already eaten, so the answer was "no", but I suggested we do breakfast tomorrow. I say "breakfast" but by the time CC gets her ass out of bed, it'll be nearly lunchtime, so it's brunch.

But the initial question about dinner reminded me of a conversation with QC2 where she asked me why I never met her for dinner, only drinks. Women meet for casual dinner, men do drinks, she explained. I didn't have an answer for her. I thought casual meet ups for friends meant something cheap like drinks whereas dinner was more expensive. She never pushed it, as far as I can recall. If she'd suggested we do dinner the next time instead of drinks, I'd have gladly gone with it.

I'm struggling to recall if I did dinner with platonic friends until I met KfW2. I know that I did lunches with plenty of people: FA1, AM, QC1 and others, but dinner was something I simply never considered. I think it was more the dinner aspect. I wasn't a fan of eating out when I was younger, so dinner as a social activity just wasn't on my radar.

So, yeah, interesting random thought. 

Plot twist.

Until yesterday, part of me had expected KfW2 to invite CC to our dinner and drinks. It was a gut feeling. I was getting the same vibes as I had done from a few years ago where KfW2 refused to commit to a time for dinner and when I tried to book something, options were limited.

When I offered her the choice of where to go and the times, she threw a huff and shared that she'd also invited CC, and we ultimately met for dinner at a restaurant near her house (20 miles away) and that was it - no drinks after or anything.

So, yeah, given her inability/reluctance to nail down a time for dinner, I was getting those vibes again. 

But then it turns out that I'd forgotten that CC's in Portugal with GB. A fact that I was only reminded about when GB posted on Facebook. Lots of pictures of food, no pictures of CC in a bikini.

Things that make you go "hmmm"...

Hot on the heels of my sex dream featuring CC a few days back, I had another one last night. This time it featured KfW2. Maybe calling it a sex dream is a bit much, but it did involve KfW2 and I being in a relationship. Sex wasn't the focus of the dream, though there were scenes where we were in bed, naked, and sex was implied. The focus was KfW2 trying to get me to open up, to communicate and to vocalise my feelings for her.

However, no matter how many times I told her that I loved her, she couldn't hear it or refused to acknowledge that I'd said the words. 

While CC's appearance in a sex dream was bemusing, KfW2's appearance is causing a little more confusion. I know that sex dreams aren't literal, but that still doesn't stop me from being concerned about KfW2's appearance in last night's dream.

In real life, KfW2 has made a couple of comments about the fact I've not told her that I love her as much as she thinks I should. Maybe it's just me, but while I have said it to her and meant it, telling someone else's wife that I love them on a regular basis, even platonically, doesn't sit right with me.

My friendship with KfW2 is very special to me, it's extremely important to me and I know that it's not something that's common: a single guy being close to a married woman. I know people have raised eyebrows that we've gone to the pub and gotten drunk together or that I've stayed overnight at her house while her husband was away. I'm not even talking about strangers who barely know us but people who've met us both, like CH, for example. 

I know CH was always intrigued by my friendship with KfW2, specifically that it was very much a two-way friendship and that KfW2 was as much a driver for us doing dinner and drinks as I was. This was obviously in stark contrast to my friendship with CH. My brother-in-law was surprised when I'd said that I'd been at KfW2's one evening for drinks while her husband was out with his friends, and he didn't return home until lunchtime the next day. 

So, yeah, I love that KfW2 wants me to tell her that I love her even if it doesn't always sit right with me, because it reminds me that she cares.

But really, the events in the dream better mirror my relationship with FA2. We weren't great communicators, though FA2 might argue that she was (she wasn't). I didn't vocalise my feelings towards her as often as she wanted, though from my perspective, I always thought my actions should have said enough. She needed to hear the words though. And one aspect of the dream rang true: I did say the words. She claims I never did.

It's safe to say that I'm a little confused this morning, the dream has thrown me a little, and I miss KfW2. 

WTF?

I had a dream last night where CC and I went on a city break somewhere. Nothing out of the ordinary in that. CC features in dreams occasionally, travel features in dreams quite often. What doesn't feature in dreams or thoughts in general is me and CC having sex.

But that was a large part of last night's dream.

CC is attractive. Physically, she ticks boxes: brunette, tall, great figure. But I don't think I've ever thought about her from a sexual perspective. Her personality always deflects from her obvious physical characteristics. Maybe a dream before? But never an actual conscious thought. Not that it concerns me... I'm a little bemused by it.

But last night's dream has given me though about travelling. 

Things to do.

AM sent a message into the previously-quiet WhatsApp chat. It effectively said the same thing that we'd agreed on a few weeks back: dinner and drinks at a restaurant I'd suggested. I've said that I'm available but no-one else has said anything so far.

That makes a busy enough month: brunch with CC yesterday, I'm assuming drinks with G next weekend and dinner with AM (and others) the weekend after that. On top of that, there are two work-related things potentially happening before the wend of the month: dinner and drinks with some current and ex-colleagues plus our annual work summer party at the end of the month with Quiet Girl, Stalky Guy and others.

Lots of socialising this month. It must be my busiest month, socially, in ages.

Brunch to Lunch.

It was after Noon by the time I heard from CC, and it took me to message her first. She really is a night owl. though given that she's also a massive sun worshipper, I had naively thought that she'd get herself out of bed earlier because the weather is too good to waste, but no. So a request for breakfast/brunch turned into brunch/lunch.

I didn't, but did.

I didn't contact CC about dinner. It's a bank holiday weekend over here, and the weather is gorgeous, so I assumed any where we'd likely go to would be rammed. I did get in touch about brunch tomorrow though. And she's agreed to it.

And we're off!

Not a bad start to my time off work. Well, that's not strictly true. I was at the dentist, first thing, for a filling. But that involved a pleasant walk of around 2 miles, listening to some music, and indulging in my... passion? for women in scrubs.

But I've also managed to do some gardening, paint the fence and message several people, including USHW. KfW2 hasn't been in touch, though that's sadly expected, especially after her message from a few days ago. I will be seeing her tomorrow, though, albeit briefly. CC hasn't been in touch either, surprisingly. I was half-expecting her to be in contact, suggesting we go out for dinner. 

There's plenty of time left in the day, though. 

And Jessica Alba didn't show up, USHW.
 

Woah!

This happens quite often: I posted yesterday about not having spoken to KfW2 in ages and how I'd planned to call her today. Well, guess who called me this morning? Yup. That seems to happen quite a lot, both ways.

We spoke for quite a while, covering topics such as our families, CC, work. KfW2 again suggested that we should meet soon, but she seemed adamant that it would be lunch, not dinner.

Part of me wanted it to be dinner. An evening out with kfW2 would be fun. An afternoon out with KfW2 would be fun, too, but I think I'd prefer an evening. I don't know why. She also suggested a Friday. She's off work on a Friday. I am not. I could take time off, quite easily. I have taken time off for social things in the past.

So, anyway, mild disappointment aside, we could be out before the end of the month. I'd like that. 

Cautiously optimistic.

So the guy came out yesterday and took some measurements for the work I want done. I'm clueless when it comes to even guessing what this type of thing costs, but I had a random number in my head. I was chatting to G about it on Saturday. The number is my "I can definitely afford this" number. Any more than that and I would have to put some thought into maybe tailoring the work - getting less done or something. However, randomly, in a general conversation, the guy mentioned my number when chatting about something else.

"Oh, your work will be less than that," he was quick to clarify.

But he couldn't give me the quote there and then. He had a couple of things to do first, but he'd call me back.

Well... he did this morning. However I don't have the final price. He's given me the quote for the things I want done, but I also require some building work that he can't give me a figure for. If this extra work adds another 20%, then I'll be more than happy. That'll still be under my number and affordable.

I've got an email out there for another quote, but the base price from yesterday's guy seems fine to me, the materials are good quality (I did some online research) and both CC and S have used this company before, so I have confidence in the quality. 

The work won't be done until the end of the summer, which is disappointing, but the important bit is that it's done before the winter sets in. 

Back at it.

While I've yet to do any of the exercises that I extracted from Chat GPT a few days ago, I have been putting other aspects of its advice into play: being more active, getting up out of my chair more, going for short, leisurely walks.

Walking to the post office yesterday to post a letter helps. Doing the favour for CC last night helped. They're not big things, but they help. I'd love to be out, doing some gardening this week, but the weather's rubbish. But that'd help, too. 

It advised taking things easy. My weight loss has also had an impact that I didn't get from Chat GPT but it was something that came up when I was cross-referencing its findings: I've lost muscle mass, too. And that could also be contributing to my back pain.

So I need to build up the muscle mass, which the exercises would help with, but general movement would also help.

It'll be weeks or months before I see some actual proper improvement, so this isn't something that'll be fixed within a few days, but it'll be a habit I have to re-form.

Plot points.

CC called me out of the blue. Well, not exactly out of the blue, because I tried to get her out for brunch a few weeks back, but that's the first contact we've had since... January?

Unsurprisingly, she wanted a favour. 

"I'll buy you dinner for it."

So I was sold.

It wasn't even that difficult a job: build some furniture. It took about 45 minutes. I think CC thought it would take longer. We adjourned to the nearest bar, which happened to be CC's local.

We chatted about various things: work, our families and TV. I don't watch a lot of (current) TV. I'm watching Daredevil at the moment and have just completed my annual rewatch of Community.

"I've started watching Euphoria" said CC.

"I've heard it's very good"

"Sydney Sweeney is in it. She gets her tits out a lot. It's a bonkers show."

"I can't say that Sydney Sweeney floats my boat, but I might give it a watch anyway."

"She what?"

"She's attractive. She has a GREAT figure. But she doesn't do it for me."

"Are you mad?"

"Not when I last checked."

And we moved on to other topics. 

Long time...

No-one's said anything in the group chat yet, though people are still being added. Due to a busy work week, I'm logging off for the week in about 20 mins and I'll treat myself to breakfast at the cafe just round the corner. I realised, when I made that decision, that I've not seen CC in ages. Months, in fact. And while I do complain about her being self-centred at times, recently she's been a lot better. So I fired her a quick message to see if she'd like to join me. She replied quite quickly. She's not available. Just me, then. I'm getting quite peckish.

Hmmm...

I was chatting to CC a few days ago about some of the work I was planning for the house this year. Surprisingly, she was rather supportive rather than being her usual bossy self. That also prompted me to look at some smallish chores I wanted to do, like (re)paint my bedroom ceiling, and a few other small tasks that I keep putting off.

A few years ago, I had a leak in the roof which dripped water onto the ceiling of my bedroom which has resulted in a couple of patches of discolouration. I had always planned to paint over it as a short-term solution once the roof was fixed (which it has been for a while now), but really, the ceilings probably need replaced.

A while back, I'd actually taken the first step and  gone over the affected areas with a sealant. Today, years later, I managed to do the second step, but it looks as if it won't work. I can still see the staining quite clearly. It might be that it will require a second coat, but I am not being optimistic about that, and I'm wondering if it's even worth the effort if I am going to replace the ceilings.

Chatty, chatty.

It was 11 AM before CC called. Thankfully she seemed to be in no mood for hanging around because, despite her claims that she was only awake, she was at my house inside of 30 minutes.

A quick brunch and I was back home by 1 PM. Thankfully, she was in decent form: more conversation and less lecturing than usual, which  I was grateful for. 

Last resorts.

I've heard nothing from anyone over the holidays - KfW2 messaged on Xmas Day, promising a phone call which hasn't yet materialised. The Crowd went quiet after my probing about a quiet night out between Xmas and New Year. And my planned brunch date with Nerdy Girl fell through with no rescheduling.

So I've been "forced" to get in touch with CC to see if she wants to do brunch tomorrow, just to tick that "socialising" box. She does, but will call me in the morning. 

I predict about 10:30, because she usually isn't awake before then. 

Planning ahead, looking back.

Facebook reminds me that it's the anniversary of the first Xmas Day out to the local Xmas market with KfW2 that also involved Mr KfW2 and CC. But most importantly, I received a drunken but extremely sweet voicemail from KfW2 at the end of the evening as she was in the taxi home, telling me how much she thought I was great.

I miss those days of our friendship, when getting her out to be social wasn't so much of a chore and hard work. It's less that two weeks until Xmas and she still hasn't confirmed any Xmas plans, despite promising to. I'll follow up with her later, or tomorrow, but I don't remain optimistic. I already know she's fully booked next weekend, which is probably our last opportunity before Xmas.