Go getter.

While I'm posting about goal-related stuff, I also have a plumber coming out tomorrow to advise on some work I want done. I've been meaning to do this for a while now, but as I posted recently, I get side-tracked and it falls off my radar.

A conversation with Quiet Girl at the start of the week prompted me to go off and make the arrangements there and then. I still have more people I need to get out, but hopefully this is a start.

Scared!

I have a job interview next week. It's my first in many, many years. Part of me will breeze it - things like accomplishments etc. I can talk about forever, and I've been involved in enough, professionally, to have lots to talk about.

However, my job it technical in nature. While I can do the job, I am mostly self-taught and don't know the jargon. That's the bit where I can almost guarantee that I'll falter. I can do some preparation, but in all honesty, I probably need to go back to school to actually learn the basics properly.

Still, if things go well, I could be looking at a promotion and a new opportunity. If things go badly, I have a good idea of what the interviews are like. I'll come out of it learning something.

Oh la la!

"Did you see the girl running around in her nightdress today?" asked KfW2.

I laughed.

"No, seriously. She was wearing this dress that came down to here" KfW2 motioned to her leg, indicating a mid, perhaps upper, thigh area.

"A night dress?" I asked, incredulously.

"Well, it looked like one. And thigh high boots as well. There was only an inch gap between the dress and the boots!"

"And you waiting until we were walking home to tell me this? Next time, I want this news while I can use it."

"She's a model, according to the guys" she clarified.

"Hang on, she works in our place or she's a model?"

"Both."

"Ah, I think I know who you mean. Tall, thin, blonde girl?"

"Yup"

And the conversation moved on.

Boing! Boing?

A week or so ago, I saw a post from QC3 on Facebook.

"New job, new house, new me!" or words of that ilk.

It transpired that she had split with her long-term partner of, well, probably over ten years. Obviously, you can't tell what's going on, but Facebook was full of "I love my man" type posts right up until Christmas. Is that just trying to show publicly that all was well when it wasn't or did it all break down recently and quickly?

Maybe that point's moot.

Today's Facebook status:

"In a relationship!"

Hmmm... back with the old man or is this a new man... or woman? QC3 has been fluid with her preferences in the past.

Woah.

My taste in women has been well documented on this blog over the years, including my erm... fondness... for backs.

I've also mentioned that I can be quite a fan of short hair and, from a celebrity perspective, Alison Brie.

So, taking all that into consideration...

Oh!

Oh?

MMBF checked herself into a nice hotel on Facebook with a male companion. I've seen his name mentioned before - he and MMBF have been friends for years, I think.

But is it more? I remember having a conversation with MMBF and MM a few years ago where MMBF admitted that she had an ex that she couldn't let go of, but admitted he was bad for her.

And more importantly, why do I care? What provoked the strong reaction to the post?

I think MMBF is an attractive, sexy, intelligent woman, but not to the extent where I'd actively make any move on her. Like CC, she has pretty much admitted to being high maintenance, a trait I don't particularly like.

Is it the hotel thing? Could be - that's a bucket list item for me. Is it a loneliness thing? Again, that seems to be an issue right now. Is it the gin talking? Doubt it - I've only had two.

Am I kidding myself and I'm more interested in MMBF than I'm admitting? I think that's unlikely, but you can't rule these things out I suppose.

D'oh

Hands up who got into a lift today, went up three floors, then back down to where he started because he was too busy talking to an attractive colleague and forgot to press the button for his floor?

Yup, this guy.

Raised eyebrows

I believe a comment by CC a few days ago led to a rather strange dream last night.

When asked if she had any plans at the weekend, she replied...

"I'm going to see my friend's new boobs and give them a good feel!"

Which I think was at least partly responsible for the dream last night that involved sex, boob jobs, CH and others.

Suffice to say, a lot of alcohol last night plus this dream has made today very frustrating.

Talky and drinky.

Unusually, GM wanted to go out for his birthday. He's never really done it before. I can only remember one time when an ex from years (probably around 2013) ago cajoling him into it. The plan was to meet at a bar, have a few drinks, then move on to a recently refurbished bar then finally a new bar.

As you might have guessed, that didn't work out. We never left the first bar all night long. It was the usual crowd - S, GM, FC etc. However, there were guests - GM had invited a friend and Mrs FC had invited a friend.

Mrs FC's friend was an attractive, thin, blonde girl in a figure hugging red dress and her name escapes me. GM's friend was an attractive brunette girl who, if I was reading the signals correctly, pretty much throwing herself at GM. Or maybe she was just being clingy because she was shy... but she spent the entire night only talking to GM and her friend. Interestingly, and I didn't realise this until today because her photos make her look different to how she looks in real life, she's been popping up in my Facebook "people you may know" recommendations over the past week or so. I may have seen her on the dating sites/apps as well.

He did admit, in a rare period where she left him alone long enough to chat, that they'd met on Plenty of Fish many, many years ago (prior to SG and the ex mentioned above) though hadn't taken it anywhere.  When he broke up with SG the first time, they'd rekindled their chats and had ended up in bed. While I left earlier than the others (they went on to a club when the pub shut), I'm pretty sure that's where they ended up last night as well.

As usual, GM was very appreciative of our chats - SG was the topic. We agreed that we see each other too infrequently these days (he claims lack of cash) and I told him that we didn't have to hit the pub and spend loads. We could have card nights, or gaming nights and a few beers. That went down well, so I'm going to try and see if we can make those a semi-regular thing.

I am a little jealous that he's matching, meeting and sleeping with people from online dating when I've always had issues even getting matches.

Dressing up

Years ago, when our company enforced a more structured dress code, KfW2 used to be a dress and leggings girl.

When the dress code was scrapped, she switched to jeans.

Lately, she's been "complaining" that she'd fed up of jeans and wants to "girly it up a bit" (my words).

For the past week, she's been wearing dresses. She has a preferred type and she wears them really well. I can't even describe the style... something like this one (only a little shorter - above the knee):

CC told her that she was looking "busty". And she was as well. She was complaining again about her weight. She was wearing the dresses well, though.

CC has also moved away from her usual clothing style - black/dark jeans and big jumpers - to lighter coloured jeans and a variety of tops. I assume that this is as a result of her gym time and wanting to show the results. She has definitely become a little tighter all round, though hasn't lost much, if anything, off her own chest.

Fair play to her... not that long ago she would have been horrified at the thought of going to gym and now she's really quite focused.

'Member?

Every now and again, USHW reminds me or informs me of an upcoming speed dating night in my city. I'd mentioned an interest in trying it and time and again, it's never actually happened. Sometimes the nights have been inconvenient and other times I've been appalling at trying to get some company to tag along. My social anxiety means that I'm unlikely to go on my own. But I had considered CC, S and GM. CC and S would be ideal - they're within the age range that I'd be able to attend, so at least two of us going would be fun. (As an aside, while CC and S are on speaking terms, I'm not entirely sure CC knows why S refused a second date or that she was/is happy about it.)

This time, though, was different. USHW let me know ages in advance. Before Christmas, actually. On a night out with GM and FP, GM actually asked if there was something happening soon. I told him of the night that USHW had told me about and we agreed that we would go.

Then it fell off my radar. And this is an issue. Lots of things have fallen off my radar. Not serious things, but I have things I want to do, research, people to talk to... and I get side-tracked (usually in work) then completely forget about for a few days. Then I'll remember about it and the cycle repeats. It's not procrastination - most times I can't drop what I'm doing and tick whatever off my list. Sigh. I need to get started on getting some of this stuff done though.

Anyway... back to it. The speed dating thing fell off my radar until USHW reminded me about it at the weekend. I messaged GM, who took a while to reply. He couldn't make it - money was tight this month, he explained. I tried to think of a backup. CC is (figuratively) getting screwed to within an inch of her life, so is out of the dating game right now and S is, well, S. I wouldn't want to rely on S alone, but I'd consider asking him if I knew GM would be there. I think he'd be interested then.

And the speed dating night was tonight. Speed dating on Valentine's night. You gotta think that's going to provide a story or two, don't you?

Happy Valentine's Day!

An admission... I've never received a Valentine's Card. Well, strictly speaking, I've never received a serious card from someone interested in me in a non-platonic way. I did get one once from QC1 (and secretly AM) that was very much tongue in cheek that I really wanted to be legit. I had kissed QC1 at a New Year's Eve party only a few weeks prior, asked her out a few days later (was shot down) and carried a huge crush on her for far too long afterwards.

Even now at my age, a small part of me hopes that a card arrives on my doormat, even though there's no one remotely on the radar.

Arguably, I should have been at a speed dating night tonight with GM for moral support, but that hasn't panned out, for reasons I'll go into in another post, later.

Random musings

While I wouldn't say that the KfW2 "revelation" has bothered me since that day it was announced, I'm presuming my reaction to it was more fuelled by alcohol than anything. There is something clearly there that I can't identify, but that's maybe for another time. I did mull something over this afternoon. The subject had been forgotten until this morning until we bumped into KfW2's mystery man in the lift.

I'd seen him, but she hadn't and I was wondering how she was going to react seeing as she had previously admitted to not speaking to any of her exes bar one.

But it seemed that she was still on speaking terms with the mystery man... once she noticed him. She can get a bit "tunnel vision". Before we got to know each other, but after we were introduced, she frequently would walk past me in the street and not see me.

Regardless... going back to that conversation in the pub, she'd said that she'd always kept quiet about the mystery man because he wasn't her normal type. Someone, CC maybe, implied that KfW2 had a thing for taller men. Indeed, the guy she dated prior to (re)meeting her now-husband was a tall guy. But the other boyfriends that I'm aware of, including the husband, all have a vague kind of similarity in terms of height and build. CC is, in my opinion, wrong. KfW2, to the best of my knowledge, has typically dated her type. She doesn't doesn't recognise that.

Whereas I know what I prefer, physically, but if I sat you down, dear reader, with a list of exes or flings and a description/photo, you'd be hard pressed to figure out what my type is.

Urgh.

Pretty much for as far back as I can remember, I've suffered from stomach issues. It's not quite acid reflux as the pain is confined to the stomach, but it is there. I've no idea what causes it, but when it strikes it can be extremely painful. I've taken to carrying around ant-acids of some kind almost all the time, so I am prepared if it strikes.

Last night, around 4 AM, I awoke with the pains. They were much more intense that I've had before. It was quite a while before I was able to get back to sleep.

I've had conversations with my GP before about it and he advised me to cut out some foods. The thing is, there is no pattern. Last night's issue was probably booze-related, but booze isn't always an issue. Same with coffee or spicy food.

I did a search for excessive acid production and this is the list:

• Citrus fruits: Oranges, lemons, limes, grapefruit, and pineapple can cause acid build-up. 
• Vegetables: Most vegetables fit into a low acid diet, but fried, canned, or creamed veggies should be avoided. Some people find that onions and tomato-based products bother them.
• Dairy products: Whole milk, high-fat creams, chocolate milk, and strongly flavored cheeses should be avoided. 
• Grains: Any grains that are made with whole milk or cream.
• Meats: High-fat meats, cold cuts, chicken wings, sausage, bacon, poultry skin, and fried or greasy meats. 
• Beverages: Alcohol, coffee, mint tea, hot cocoa, and other caffeinated beverages
• Spicy foods: Hot peppers, curry, garlic, and salsa are some examples.
• Fiber: Too much fiber can cause acid production to go into overdrive since it takes a long time for the food to pass through the stomach.
• Ulcers or cancers: Either of these can lead to an increase in the production of the hormone gastrin, which increases acid production.
• Stress: Research shows people who are severely stressed produce more acid in their stomachs.
• Infection: Bacterial infection by the bacterium H. pylori can also increase acid production.
• Irregular meals: Not having meals at a regular time or having long gaps between meals can result in acid accumulation.
• Lack of sleep: This can also increase acid production in some individuals

My diet is pretty varied, so I eat a lot of stuff including lots on that list, though as I said, there's no real pattern that I can see between my diet and a flare up of the tummy issues.

Still, I've been pretty tired all day. A good night's sleep awaits me tonight.

And then this happened...

"I'm doing my calendar for the next couple of months. What about this date at the end of March?" said KfW2.

She suggested a date. It sounded good. I told her that.

"I'm writing this in my diary and I'm using pen," I told her.

"OK, me too" she said.

And like that, we now have another date arranged. Will we see it through or will something throw it off? My assumption is the former. Unlike CH, for example, KfW2 is good at seeing through arrangements.

Yeah, so this happened...

At tea-break in work:

"So, " said KfW2 "That date we agreed on is out. I'm out with the hubby for his birthday."

"OK" What was I going to say? I know his birthday is about now.

"It gets tricky though. That weekend is his birthday, the week after that we're doing lunch and the week after that is my friend's hen weekend"

I must have sighed, or had a look on my face or something. She continued:

"It's not that bad. We were out last weekend and we're out next month too" (with the same people we were out with last weekend).

I hadn't told her, but I wasn't planning on going out with those people next month. It was nice as an infrequent thing, but I'm not sure I want to do it on a monthly basis. Plus, this was me taking her out for her birthday. Just the two of us. The last time it was just the two of us was her birthday two years ago. And the time before that when it wasn't a special occasion, I can't actually remember. I do know that I've been trying to get her out for around a year.

"We could do the end of this month" she offered.

But I know she's already committed to a spa day out with CC and a few others on that weekend and with her money being tight, that'll be that.

She knows that I value our time together and she knows that I don't think that group events or helping her look after the kids are a replacement. I'm happy to do them, but if the cost of that is that the irregular nights out are gone, I don't like the price I am paying.

As I said recently, there's a completely different vibe when it's just the two of us alone, and especially on "neutral" ground of the pub or in my house with no prying ears. It must be the alcohol because it's not there on a day-to-day basis when we have lunch together for example.

I'm not even angry. I'm just disappointed and tired.

Ch-ching?

I had a chat with one of KfW2's friends today, in work. She's more senior than I am, so I wanted to pick her brains about having a chat with my boss around my salary. She advised to approach one of the HR girls. She specifically called out an attractive, blonde girl with a great figure and an amazing smile... who's one of GM's exes.

Still, she was helpful and encouraging. I have a meeting set up with the HR girl for tomorrow morning.

Fingers crossed, but I am asking for a rather large pay rise. I know I'm due one regardless, but I am looking to close the gap between myself and my colleagues, all of whom earn substantially more than I do. I'm not expecting the gap to disappear, but I'd like it to close a good bit.

A little closer.

Ignoring my undetermined feelings from yesterday, it was good getting KfW2 out. KfW2 is really good fun when she's drunk, but there's also something else.

We're very close, but I think when we're out alone, with a few drinks, that becomes even more so.

Even yesterday, when the others were off having a smoke, and it was just the two of us, we went directly into that mode. Before one of the others guessed the identity of KfW2's mystery man, she'd already voluntarily said that she'd tell me once everyone else had left. I'd not asked, though I had laughed at her coyness at naming the guy while telling us now many co-workers she'd slept with.

We also have a date for our night out - the first Saturday in March. Let's hope nothing changes. I'm already looking forward to it.

Figure it out.

I had hunted through my old posts, searching for a specific post on a specific topic which mirrored the events that prompted last night's alcohol-fuelled frustration based expletive. I was going to link to it to provide context, but I'm now questioning if I even posted it or if it was just a conversation I'd had with USHW.

However, to the point at hand... I was out with, amongst others, KfW2 and CC.

For some inexplicable reason, the topic of conversation was co-workers that KfW2 had slept with. She admitted to four. Two are already known to me - one was a long-term boyfriend of hers who she dated, on and off, for around five years. The other was a guy KfW2 was friendly with, who she recently admitted to me to dating for a bit.

This was the post I was looking for - my reaction to her admission surprised me in its intensity, though I couldn't figure out at the time what it was I was feeling.

One of the other guys was briefly discussed, but KfW2 was very coy about the last one. She wasn't embarrassed by him, nor did she regret it, he was actually a really nice bloke, she said. Her reluctance to talk about him was the fact that he was "so not the type I usually go for". Eventually, one of the girls guessed the identity of the anonymous love interest... and she was right, I'd never have guessed at this person.

I'm not posting about KfW2's admission per se, but my reaction to it. It was the same as the reaction to her previous admission, only even more intensive in the way these things are when fuelled with alcohol.

And I still can't figure out what I was feeling. Disappointment? Loneliness? Jealousy? Anger? I'm still unsure, but when I arrived home last night after a boozy afternoon in a nice pub, I was still frustrated. And angry at myself for not being able to figure myself out.

I was going to post most of this last night, but I was too tipsy to actually maintain concentration long enough, so you got the frustrated expletives instead.

Oh, and CC admitted that the night she hooked up with her new man, she got fucked so many times she actually had difficulty walking for a few days. I was definitely jealous after that. Not that I want to sleep with CC, but more the fact she had an amazing session. I could do with one of those.

EDIT: I say that KfW2 "recently" admitted to dating a co-worker, but it was actually over a year ago. Not last month as I had remembered.

Fuck

Fuck.

That is all. I shall return when sober to explain.

Noooooooooooooooooo!

The National Lottery website is down! How am I meant to buy my ticket and win £105 million pounds?*

*Waste £2.50