The Price of Admission.

An admission of sorts from KfW2 who said that she had been putting off a night out with me. It's disappointing, of course, though I am aware that money is tight for her right now, even though she still manages to do a fair bit of socialising.

That was prompted by the fact that she asked me to do her a favour, and that she admitted that she didn't want to ask me for a favour because she knew she had been putting off the night out and was feeling guilty.

I know I'm doing stuff the day of the favour, but the night time? I'm pretty sure I have something on, but can I remember what it is?

Yay. But maybe sigh?

Out of the blue, a message from KfW2. I wasn't expecting to hear from her today as she's got a load of stuff on.

"Hey!"

"Sup?"

"You know our night out?" (I've posted before that it's been far too long since we had just a Ruuude and KfW2 night out - years, in fact.)

"Yup."

"Does it have to be the CB Bar*?"

"Nope. That was just a suggestion, instead of hitting our usual places for a change of scenery. Plus you said you really liked CB Bar"

"Cool. You should come down to my local. We can have our night our there. I've been putting this off cos I don't have much spare money and taxis are expensive, and you know I don't go out much. What about that?"

"Yeah, sounds good. But, you know I've got a spare bed? I wouldn't expect you to get taxis to and from your house? Drive to mine, ditch the car and stay over? Drive home the next day?"

"Woohoo!"

Now, the "woohoo" was at my agreement to go to her local rather than the offer to stay over. I think. I've made the offer to stay over many times - it's an open offer that extends not just to us heading out together. If she's in town, there's a bed going spare instead of spending well over twenty pounds to get home. She knows it's there. She has an issue, I think, with staying at mine because I am single and a bloke. Or rather, she has an issue with people's perception of her, a married woman, staying overnight in the house of a guy who's single.

And it kinda makes me sad. It makes me sad that, once again, I have to go to her. Us socialising was one of the few times I could get her on my turf. It makes me sad that she has an issue with people's perception of her (I understand where she's coming from, I just don't agree with it, though I've been told by quite a few people that my opinions on a lot of societal norms are non-standard). I'm also sad because, as I have posted before, KfW2 goes out a fair bit. Now, a lot of her socialising is not just her and friends sitting in a pub. She doesn't do that an awful lot... but she does socialise.

But, the conversation leads me to think that our night out is going to be sooner rather than later, and that is most definitely, a good thing.

*The bar where I first saw CB in the flesh, where FP and I often meet to catch up. It's not the closest bar to my house, but I'd regard it as my local.

Ooops!

Facebook reminds me that today is FA2's birthday (so three days ago would have been our anniversary).

However, it also tells me that FA2 is two years older than I am. I'd always remembered that it was only a year between us.

Or did I know her correct age originally and have since forgotten it?

Cheers!

I couldn't help myself. She's my friend. But she loves a plunging neckline does E, so over dinner and many, many drinks, I fought all night long to make eye contact.

I was mostly successful, but I'm pretty sure my eye wandered... and I'm pretty sure I was caught at least once.

Still, it was a brilliant night. I introduced E to a new restaurant that she loved, our chat flowed just like it used to do, and we had a lot of drinks. I had expected E to call it early, but she was as eager to stay out and prolong our night as I was.

It was well past midnight when we called it quits, with a semi-arrangement to do something similar in a few weeks before she returns home, this time with her sister in tow.

A tactical day off followed and I hope that the tentative plans work out.

Dreams.

Whilst out with E last night (I'll post more on that another time), she mentioned that her sister wouldn't join us - she was off on a girly weekend somewhere. ES would come out the next time I was out with E, though.

For years, E refused to let us meet her little sister - a model and dancer - and we teased her about it. E's sister is nice and we're friendly. Personality-wise, she reminds me a little of Sports Girl - that kind of flaky, free spirit, bonkers kind of girl that SG is (though hopefully without being twisted).

Anyway, the real reason I was making this post was to comment on a dream I've had a few times. E's home, she invites out her sister and her sister turns up, along with Attractive Neighbour. AN and I have super chemistry and we end up back at hers for a night of adult physical fun.

AN is very attractive, but even though I swipe right on her on Tinder (and I did this morning), I can't say she really floats my boat. I think it's the assumption that she's high maintenance, judging by her online dating profiles and profile pictures (she's not a jeans girl).

Enjoyable dreams, but not one likely to happen in the real world.

Eating and drinking.

It must be a day for reminiscence (or random memories popping up), but one of the last times I remember meeting up with QC2 (which must be near ten years ago now), she made a comment.

"A difference between boys and girls is that girls meet up over dinner and boys meet up in the pub."

I wasn't going to disagree, though my experiences were different. I did have a question, though.

"How many male friends do you meet for a catch up chat?" I asked. I think I knew that answer.

She thought for a few seconds.

"Only you." She paused. "And to be fair, it's not like you're a typical bloke. And I know we meet in pubs because you don't like eating out"

That part used to be true. In my youth, the thought of sitting in a nice restaurant for a couple of hours eating and talking really didn't float my boat. It's something I've grown in to, though if you offer me the choice of meeting a friend in a nice restaurant or meeting a friend in a cosy pub, I'm more likely to choose the later any day.

What?

Years ago, until I was in my mid-teens, my parents owned a holiday home down by the coast. That's where I first met D. To justify the rather high cost of the holiday home, my parents would take us down there every chance they got - weekends, school holidays (in season). It's where I was lucky enough to meet a young lady called Sharon - my first real girlfriend.

I always had mixed feelings about the holiday home. It was nice to get away for a change of scenery, but I was always worried about leaving my "proper" friends behind for prolonged periods. Ultimately, it never worked out negatively and I consider myself lucky to have two groups of friends - my school friends and my holiday friends. In fact, my relationship with the holiday friends was different. There was less pressure to conform, less judgement. The age ranges were wider as well, often hanging out with people several years older or younger.

There was a family who owned the house opposite with two daughters, both around my age. I was friendly with them, but they were rarely at their holiday home at the same time as we were. The youngest, for the sake of this story, was called Adrienne.

Inexplicably one year, despite not having seen Adrienne in months, near the end of the summer I got it into my head that a) she would join my school at the start of term and b) I was attracted to her.

I was absolutely convinced of the first part, so much so that I was disappointed when the first day of school rolled round and she wasn't introduced to the class.

I have zero idea why that popped into my head this afternoon.

Out of time.

Facebook reminded me of a picture that I had shared on Facebook, a good few years ago now. As part of the photo being posted, I had a conversation with R2.

Bear in mind that there's already a web being weaved where I last lived - Attractive Neighbour knowing E's Sister, E's Sister dating the prior occupants of the house where I lived so even before ES and AN knew each other, they'd spent time literally 5 metres apart, albeit with a wall between them.

But the comments on the photo also reminded me that R2 had admitted to also living next door, in the same housing development, though she'd moved on just before I moved in.

Or, as I prefer to say... I've slept in the same bed as ES and lived beside R2, only not at the same time.

Not the end of the line!

It turns out that CC is not single again, and the issues she was facing have been recognised, if not resolved for the better.

She was telling me that he's busy, that he didn't realise that no contact was a bad thing and a few other things.

I suggested that the excuses didn't matter. If semi-regular contact is important to CC, then it should be a higher priority to him than it is currently. Of course, there's a balance to be found between KfW2 who talks to her husband four or five times a day (and who live together, obviously) and CC's irregular contact with her boyfriend who lives in a foreign country, that's a good six hour flight away.

CC admitted that she was surprised by my support.

"Why?" I asked.

"Cos boys stick together." said CC. "Are you sure you don't have a female side?"

KfW2 agreed and admitted her own surprise.

"I don't see it as a male/female thing," I explained. "Your other half is letting you down and your 'demands' aren't unreasonable. If you were being unreasonable, I'd tell you."

And that was that. I had been convinced that CC would be single today and I'd be offering to take her out on the town tomorrow night to get drunk on cocktails.

End of the line.

Poor CC... I think it's the end of her "relationship" with her long-time friend and now lover. It's difficult enough to maintain a long-distance relationship, but to start a relationship from distance is much, much more difficult.

And so it was... almost from the beginning, the now-boyfriend was not in contact frequently enough and the contact that there was was often via text message rather than phone calls. The contact itself wasn't great either, I'm led to believe - no utterances of how gorgeous or sexy CC is - that kind of thing.

She was also concerned that she wasn't his priority and that opportunities to meet up with CC were sometimes put aside in favour of meeting his friends etc.

While I haven't said as much to her, it sounds to me like he was treating CC as a fuck buddy rather than a girlfriend.

And a final bizarre, but funny, criticism is that he doesn't like sex at night. CC herself is not a morning person. KfW2 was incredulous.

"You take it when you can get it" she declared. Though she has three young kids and is juggling a career. Or maybe she just really loves sex? Though admittedly, I am in agreement. It's been a while since I've had regular sex, but I had no preference for mornings over evenings or vice-versa, nor have I had a partner who'd voiced such an opinion.

Still... CC's back on the market (or will be after tonight).

Ssssshhhhhh!

Don't tell anyone, but I was at the pub at lunchtime. A few pints, some laughter with work colleagues and back to the office for the longest three hours in the world until it's home time.

Day time drinking is brilliant, but only if you don't have to go back to the office afterwards.

Eeeeeeeep!

E and I had settled into a routine once our friendship took off, especially when she moved away and wasn't back that often. When we were both in the same city, we tended to drink... a lot. If it was during the day, we'd find a bar with a pool table and play pool, getting increasingly worse as we got less sober. Or, if at night, then we'd find something to do that would let us drink. Comedy nights were favourites of ours.

So if I told you that, at some point in the next four weeks, I'd be going to a comedy night and have set aside an afternoon for playing pool, what would you think?

Yup! E's home. She sent a message earlier and I'm really quite excited. The last time she was home, we met under more kid-friendly circumstances. Not ideal, but I'm used to it with KfW2. This time, though, E's the one suggesting adult days out.

Failure(?)

For a while not, I've had a recurring if infrequent dream. It revolves around me being at university, though my attendance has been poor and it's exam time. My lecturers are looking for me, for some... I can't figure out what it is - my exam papers? Coursework? It's definitely something along those lines. I'm at risk of failing, though I can't understand why. And before I get any answers or before my lecturers find me, I wake up in a somewhat anxious mood.

Round and round we go.

It's Speed Dating tonight. I won't be going. GM is off doing his sport thing which, sadly, always takes precedence over anything else (especially now he's offloaded Sports Girl). S never replied to my message. That typically means he's not interested rather than he forgot or has something else on. One of these days I might actually summon up the confidence to go on my own, but I don't think that's going to be today.

Keep on running.

Any time I've tried to get fitter, I've always started off slowly and tried to ease into the programme and build up a habit for the exercise. That's what I tend to do in all aspects of my life, I think. KfW2, on the other hand, goes full tilt into something. As I've posted about recently, KfW2 has started a Couch to 5 K running programme. Guess what? She's binned it cos it's going too slow for her. She's made up her own programme that's a lot more intensive. Also, guess what? KfW2 has injured both of her hips less than a week after starting the running.

I did say to her that she should ease into it having not done any exercise in around six years, but KfW2 is not a listener.

She's quick to anger when no-one takes advice though.

Ambiguity.

Facebook memories reminded me today that it's seven years since E's friend, R3, got married. At one point, I think E was trying to set me up with R3 (she's not my type), but at roughly the same time, I think R3 was trying to set me up with E. I know E eventually admitted to her part. I can't actually remember if R3 ever admitted to attempted matchmaking (though she did admit that E's friends wanted something to start between us).

I've kicked around the idea that my feelings towards E were not entirely platonic. I remain unconvinced one way or the other. On some days I admitted that I may have categorised my feelings towards the romantic, on other days, she is simply a friend that I was extremely fond of.

The ambiguity is long gone - she's very much a friend, albeit one that I don't talk to as often was I should.

However, E's friend invited me to her wedding. We weren't really that close nor would I consider us as "friends". I think that R3 wanted something from me that day - a date/company for E, or maybe a last-ditch attempt to get us together?

I didn't go to the wedding. E was R3's bridesmaid so she would have been busy doing bridesmaid-y things and I would have been stuck in a room of 100 people that I didn't know. The stress and anxiety would have killed me. Plus, if I remember correctly, E had already been dating her partner, so that angle was off the cards had I considered it.

Still... I haven't spoken to E for ages. I need to set up a video chat ASAP.

*bites fist*

I was chatting with KfW2 over drinks about her new fitness regime. She was very pleased about her progress so far but had complained about having some niggling injuries. Nothing that would stop her from continuing, but that would probably stop her from pushing herself as hard as she has been.

That's her problem - she won't be happy with the pace of the Couch 2 5K programmes she's looked at. She'll use them as a base, then push herself ten times harder than she should.

I told her as much.

As we were chatting her husband came into the room and was teasing about her about her fitness plans.

"I'm gonna have abs before you" she retorted.

While her husband's teasing was misplaced - I think it should be supported all the way - I was actually focused on the thought of KfW2 with abs.

Mmmm... KfW2 with abs.

That reminds me of pole vaulter, Allison Stokke.