Tea for two.

CC's just messaged asking if I wanted to go for dinner tonight. I've already eaten, so the answer was "no", but I suggested we do breakfast tomorrow. I say "breakfast" but by the time CC gets her ass out of bed, it'll be nearly lunchtime, so it's brunch.

But the initial question about dinner reminded me of a conversation with QC2 where she asked me why I never met her for dinner, only drinks. Women meet for casual dinner, men do drinks, she explained. I didn't have an answer for her. I thought casual meet ups for friends meant something cheap like drinks whereas dinner was more expensive. She never pushed it, as far as I can recall. If she'd suggested we do dinner the next time instead of drinks, I'd have gladly gone with it.

I'm struggling to recall if I did dinner with platonic friends until I met KfW2. I know that I did lunches with plenty of people: FA1, AM, QC1 and others, but dinner was something I simply never considered. I think it was more the dinner aspect. I wasn't a fan of eating out when I was younger, so dinner as a social activity just wasn't on my radar.

So, yeah, interesting random thought. 

Happy talk.

I meant to call KfW2 yesterday to suggest we meet for coffee today. She doesn't work on Fridays and I am taking personal time this week.

I forgot though, and called her this morning. She didn't pick up.

It was almost inevitable that the phone rang as I was just about to step into the shower. I literally had one foot in when the phone went. In total there were three calls, as she kept needing to hang up to do something: put petrol in her car, call her daughter and pick up her daughter. But in total, these three calls totalled nearly an hour.

I would far rather have done the chat over a coffee, but that's entirely on me. I'm pretty sure she'd have agreed to meet if I'd called yesterday.

Promises, promises.

As a result of the family stuff over the past few weeks, I've been speaking to quite a few people. The two that are of specific interest to this post, are AM and Mrs FC. Both have promised that we'll see each other soon. A night out will be arranged, they promised.

AM made a similar promise a few years ago and that never panned out. I've posted over the past few months about the long-silent WhatsApp chat. She can talk a good game, I'll give her that.

I have more faith in Mrs FC coming through, but still not massively.

And I wonder if the guilt aspect has anything to do with it. I have prompted The Crowd to meet up over the past few months and gotten no traction. There was the night out with AM that I posted about that took far too much work to arrange. But then AM was complaining about trying to arrange nights out and getting no reply. I spent 20 years doing that before I took a back seat. And even now, AM has to get her own way when we do arrange something.

But let's see? I'll try and be positive, but history suggests otherwise.

Urgh.

I was probably pushing my luck a bit with the sleep thing: I've had weeks of great sleep. So I was pissed when I dropped off to sleep quickly last night, but woke less than an hour later because my (elderly) neighbour was watching TV until well after 1 AM.

I didn't get to sleep until after 3 AM. 

And I'm feeling it today. 

House of Fun

I've done stage 1 of the carpet shopping. On the way there, I took a minor detour past one of FBS's old houses. The one she lived in when we had our brief thing. It brought back some very fond memories. Fond x-rated memories.

And now I need a cold shower. 

Get out.

It's only been a week and a bit since I was meant to do dinner and drinks with KfW2. The recent night out with G has given me a taste for... something. I would try with KfW2 to rearrange something... and I will... but she's unlikely to have any free time until near the end of November.

There's a potential work night out at the end of this month, but that's 4 weeks away. I have a definite night out with D, FBS and Friction Guy in three weeks time.

That's the kind of thing that I'm craving - a night out with friends somewhere that I don't usually go. Interaction with strangers, too. That's what I got with G on Saturday.

I think it ties into the whole loneliness thing from last week, too. 

Walking softly.

I was planning on going carpet shopping today. I pretty much know what I want, but I want to go down to the local carpet shop and see a few samples for myself. I'll also need to arrange a measurement and get an estimate for materials and fitting. I've measured it myself, so I have a ballpark idea of what I need, but in this instance, for stairs and landing, I'd like a proper second opinion.

But despite the fact that I have been sleeping really well over the past week or so, motivation is proving to be a big issue. Part of that is the weather: it's very showery today. That reduces my inclination to leave the house.

It's meant to be nicer tomorrow, so I'll maybe just do that instead. Make a morning of it: get out early, do what I need to do and then hit up a local cafe for coffee and perhaps even a late breakfast. I like the sound of that.

Out and about.

Sadly, KfW2 wasn't in contact yesterday as she promised. On the flip side, G was. He asked if I was up to going out for a few drinks, and I was. I quite fancied some time in the pub, chatting and people watching. I have been out of the house quite a lot this past 2 weeks, but not in a way that scratches a social itch.

And I spent the night chatting to G and eyeing up some cute brunettes, one of whom sorta resembled Holly Marie Combs and a really cute petite woman who was dancing nearby.

It was just the tonic I needed - a change of scenery, some different company and an evening of possibilities (even if I was never going to actually take any of them if they presented themselves.

Weight off my mind.

I've posted recently, though not in any detail, that I've lost a lot of weight. There was a specific incident around two years ago that sparked the weight loss. I had to wear my suit for a funeral, except it no longer fitted me. I was gutted for two reasons: firstly, I love that suit. I've gotten really good feedback when I've worn it and more than one woman has given me a good eyeing up when I've worn it, including CH. 

I also have a great memory of the day I bought it - I was accompanied by KfW2 as a trusted second set of eyes (I am useless at buying clothes out of my comfort zone and needed the backup) and we got lucky in that it was only the second or third suit I'd tried on.

That meant we were able to get into the second part of the day much sooner than expected, which was food and pub, and it's been well-recorded on this blog how much I love those days out with KfW2 and how much they mean to me, especially when I have something I want to talk about. 

So, yeah, I couldn't fit into my suit. I needed something quickly. The funeral was within 48 hours. I tried on a cheap suit at my local shopping centre's Marks and Spencer and that's when the reality hit: the smallest suit to fit me was at least 2 sizes bigger than the current suit.

It took less than a second for me to make up my mind. I bought the cheap suit hoping that I'd only need to wear it once, that I was going to start trying to lose weight in earnest. And I did. 

It took me nearly 20 months to get roughly to where I wanted to be. I haven't actually hit my target goal, but I'm only a couple of pounds away from it, but I've kind of found some kind of equilibrium. I don't know that I can lose more without massively increasing my exercise. And I don't know if I want to. I can lose more: I'm currently right at the very top of the ideal weight range for someone of my height and age, but I'm really happy with where I am.

And I might still have to buy another suit. I've now lost so much weight that my favourite suit still doesn't fit me, but for more positive reasons. 

A Hands-On Connection

I think I've figured out why I've been so damned horny all week and it's probably not surprising. It's not simply being horny. I think it tied into a general loneliness funk which was exaggerated with last week's family stuff and currently being single. I've also posted, in the past, about being touch starved, and that's still a thing, too.

So it all kinda rolled up into one big "loneliness" ball last week that partly, though strongly, manifested itself as me being really horny and desiring intimate physical contact that means not just sex but cuddling too. 

It's still a bit of an issue, but I've not been thinking about K on waking for the past few mornings. 

Hello, goodbye.

I got through a lot of socialising yesterday. I'd list the names of those in attendance, a lot of which would be familiar to readers of this blog, but the ones I wanted to call out were KfW2 and G. I also didn't do as much mingling as I perhaps should have. I pretty much neglected some family, though not on purpose.

When KfW2 was leaving, she promised to call today, so I'm hoping to hear from her. I might also be meeting G again this evening for a few quiet drinks. That'd also be welcome.