Pondering.

I had half expected to hear from KfW2 this weekend, if not to suggest doing something, then to at least call after her comments from last weekend. But nothing so far. I've been super-busy all day long with family stuff that I think might be mostly sorted, at least for now.

And I need to think about taking some time off work. I have a lot still to take between now and the end of the year.  I usually take a week off around now, but I'm due to move to a new team in work (to report to the tall drunk girl) and I don't want to do that the first week on the job, but I don't really have much choice. I'm also getting some work done to the house imminently that might require taking some time off, and it's entirely possible that it could be the first week of September, the same week I start the new job.

FFS.

I took a few hours off work earlier to do some family stuff, with my sister. It was a meeting that we'd requested and it had already been cancelled. 

After an hour, my sister and I prepared to leave. before we left the building, I called the person we were meant to meet. She didn't answer. A co-worker picked up.

We swapped formalities. I stated that I was not happy that I've taken time off work, for that to be wasted, and for a meeting that had already been postponed at the last moment.

She apologised and said her boss would be in touch. 

A few hours later, her boss was in touch.

I re-iterated my points from earlier. 

"It says here that a message was left on Friday." 

"Not to my phone. It's on me pretty much all the time. It could have gone to my sister, though she would have checked her phone even if she didn't pick up the call. Do you know what number was used?" 

"I don't, but I can ask my boss to call you when she's next free? That might be a day or so, though."

"Yes, please." 

I gave my sister this information.

"No-one left me a message."

"Well, someone might phone me back and we'll find out what number they used.

A few hours later, my sister calls me.

"That thing we wanted to happen? Well, it's going to happen."

That's good news, but there's also context.

Something changed mid-May, and as a direct result of that, there was a medical issue. And now, three months later, the thing that had changed is now being put back in place. So we're back where we started, except the medical thing has happened and is having a daily impact. And to say that I am furious is an understatement. 

I know this is vague and might not make sense,  but I wanted to get it out there, to vent a little.

Ring, ring.

A surprise phone call from KfW2 earlier. Unsurprisingly, she was in the car on her way back from the shops, cramming some last-minute chores into time she didn't have because she's off on a family weekend away for her mother-in-law's birthday.

The conversation was cut short because her husband was calling her and she promised to call back.

She didn't, of course. And I wasn't expecting her to: she had to go home, pack, sort our her three manic kids and leave for a 60 mile trip to the Air BnB.

But I sent her a message - Facebook reminded me of a visit to my house from KfW2 about ten years ago with her eldest daughter in tow, and I got a couple of really cute pics. I sent them on to KfW2. she replied quickly.

"I totally forgot to call you back! When are you free next?" 

Free next for what? A phone call? Dinner and drinks? I was getting mixed vibes from the question.

"I'm free anytime"

That's true.  After a busy-ish July, my diary is empty.

How long will it take KfW2 to reply? 

Bah (cont'd)

Brother-in-law just messaged. He's literally waiting for the bus into town. I've just started cooking tea. Even if I were inclined to join them, I'm probably 2 hours from leaving the house. If he'd messaged an hour ago, I'd have cooked earlier or grabbed something in town.

Why is it so hard for people to communicate? 

Bah.

My brother-in-law sent a message at lunchtime. Did I want to go to the festival? I mentioned it in my last post. It's a music festival across the entire city centre. Facebook has been full of people having fun. But it's not really my thing. At least the music genre isn't really my thing.

I replied back and asked when they were thinking of going, I suggested that I'd probably go, but as it wasn't really my thing, I'd probably not hang around for long. I'd show my face, soak up some of the (supposedly excellent) atmosphere and then head back home once I'd had enough. And I reckon I'd probably not last 90 minutes, but it's the kind of thing that probably worth experiencing, right?

But that was hours ago. 

As I said, I'm not massively bothered about going, but still... I asked a direct question. Are they already there? When he said "later" did he mean this evening rather than the afternoon? I definitely got "afternoon" vibes from the message.

This is typical of my sister and brother-in-law. Communication is woeful. 

Talky.

KfW2 has been chatty today... at least via text message. That's weird for two reasons: firstly, she's been difficult to contact recently and getting a response from one text message is usually considered a bit of a result. Secondly, she's back at work today after over three weeks off. She gets super-focused when she's at work and doesn't usually reply to messages until after she's clocked off, but I must have gotten half a dozen messages today.

Here we go?

I'm looking forward to seeing AM and Mr AM tonight. To the best of my knowledge, no-one else is showing up. At least, no-one's said anything in the group chat. It really wouldn't surprise me if QC1 and her husband showed up. That's typical of QC1. She'd only have said anything if she were unhappy with the arrangements.

the girl who started the WhatsApp chat has claimed that she's clearing her kitchen in anticipation of getting work done soon, so she can't attend. Guess who else has been cleaning and clearing their kitchen in anticipation of getting work done within the next few weeks? Yep, me. And yet I'm still organised enough to attend. After all, this isn't a last-minute thing. The date has been out there since the start of the month.  Anyone not replying to say they can/can't make it is just plain fucking rude.

Plans.

Remember a few weeks ago, I stated in this post that I had tentative plans in place with AM and her husband to do dinner and drinks? Well, a few days after that, AM posted in the Quiet WhatsApp Group about it. I was the only person to reply. It's now two weeks after that again, and the tentative date mentioned is this coming Saturday.

I skipped the Quiet Group and messaged AM directly: are we still doing Saturday?

No reply as yet.

Regardless of what happens on Saturday, I'm leaving the group on Sunday. What's the fucking point when people don't even have the decency to reply to a message/question about meeting up? It's not even me being ignored, but I'm still angry at their uselessness.

(As an aside, I fully expect QC1 to be in touch with AM directly and if we do go out on Saturday, I expect QC1 and her husband to show up.)

Plans ahoy!

G was in touch late last night. We've tentatively arranged to do something tomorrow, but the timing is still to be confirmed. It could be afternoon, it could be evening. With the weather the way it is, I don't really care either way.

I think G is leaning more towards coming into the city centre, but I don't really mind. It's unlikely that he'll be alone. I know his youngest son and wife are also over, so they could well be in tow. I don't really know his kids, and I've only met his wife a few times. She's one of those who doesn't show her face too often.

But it should be a decent afternoon or evening out, regardless. 

Incommunicado

Not heard back from G, though I wasn't expecting anything today, to be honest. My assumption is that he'll get some family stuff out of the way, freeing up the rest of his time here. And if memory serves, he said he'd be here until Sunday.

What is slightly more concerning is the lack of contact from E and Nerdy Girl. E eventually replied to my birthday wishes with a message, which I've replied to. But that was over a week ago and she's said nothing since. And I sent Nerdy Girl a message a few days ago suggesting we meet next week for a walk, but she's strangely silent too. It's only been two days, but she's rarely, if ever, taken longer than 12 hours to reply to a message.

Brunch to Lunch.

It was after Noon by the time I heard from CC, and it took me to message her first. She really is a night owl. though given that she's also a massive sun worshipper, I had naively thought that she'd get herself out of bed earlier because the weather is too good to waste, but no. So a request for breakfast/brunch turned into brunch/lunch.

I didn't, but did.

I didn't contact CC about dinner. It's a bank holiday weekend over here, and the weather is gorgeous, so I assumed any where we'd likely go to would be rammed. I did get in touch about brunch tomorrow though. And she's agreed to it.

Redemption.

Ages ago, like years, like pre-Covid, I had a period where, for no reason, I got super-paranoid that KfW2 had found this blog. it was unfounded paranoia. I woke one morning with the idea planted in my head and couldn't shake it for a few weeks, then it disappeared. I can't remember if I blogged about it or chatted to USHW about it.

But, back to today and  the post I made on Wednesday where I complained about KfW2 pleading poverty and also her random text messaging because she wouldn't text yesterday.

Well, she did text yesterday and there was the seeds of an actual conversation. And she arrived today, fully apologetic because she had to literally drop off some stuff and leave. But even though she was only here for ten minutes, she still offered up about four hugs. I love hugs. I love hugs with boobs, too. They hit different.

And her final parting sentence:

"When we come back, do you want to go for dinner or do that thing we did a few years back?" 

No mention of poverty.

"Let's figure it out when you come back."

Though, dear Reader, I am already leaning towards dinner. 

But, yeah, anyone would think that she'd been  reading the blog. She does have a habit of redeeming herself like this, though.

And speaking of dinner, I'm tempted to contact CC and see if she wants to do something low-key this evening. I'll see how I feel in an hour. 

Sad Face

I was in the middle of making dinner last night when my phone pinged several times. It was KfW2. It was a pattern that long-term readers will find familiar coming from KfW2:

"I've missed you! We've not spoken in ages!"

"When we come back from holidays, you have to come and visit cos I won't be able to afford to go out!"

And then a gif and a voice note, all interspersed with a few "lol"s for good measure.

But this is a pattern. We don't see each other for ages, I suggest going out, KfW2 is unavailable then claims she can't afford to go out, and we end up having drinks at hers.

I'm partly to blame. I've not been in touch with her for months and the last time we spoke a few weeks back, she beat me to the call by about 10 mins: I was going to call her after seeing my Dad, but she called as I was leaving.

There are a number of reasons why I'm a little disappointed in the messages. I'm glad she was in touch. Having my friends get in contact proactively or even visit is hugely important to me. But if she'd done it tomorrow? That would have been so much better, for personal reasons (and she did cover that in her voice note). I'm also meant to be doing her a favour, and I was expecting to see her in person on Friday. But there's been no mention of that.

Here's looking at you.

I think my brother in law made a bit of a faux pas last night. I got a WhatsApp message from him, and I only saw it briefly. It mentioned my weight loss, fairly accurately too, so I think he used AI to determine how much weight I've lost because I've not told anyone exactly how much I've lost.

But the message was quickly deleted and he shared a photo from last Monday's family event: a picture of me, him and my nephew. And I have to say, it's a great picture of us.

But it's the first time I've seen "me" since I started the weight loss journey over 18 months ago. I mean, I've looked in the mirror but I've not seen a photo and it was difficult to recognise the person looking back at me. There's the weight loss, of course, but due to hair loss, I've also started keeping my hair really short.

So the face looking back at me from the photo was familiar,  but it wasn't me. In a good way, I think.

Hello?

I sent E a WhatsApp message a few days ago as it was her birthday. According to WhatsApp, she's not even read it, never mind acknowledged it. I hope things are OK. I don't think we've swapped messages since the start of the year.

LOL.

I was swapping messages with USHW and she said something that provoked a memory of CAB.

I was out at a pub with CAB and BW and a few others including BW's younger brother. We were having a discussion of some kind, a light-hearted "boys vs girls" kind of conversation when BW's little brother proudly pronounced that "blokes invented batteries" and sat there feeling quite smug.

We knew what the undercurrent was of that, but it was kinda surprising to hear that come from BW's little bro.

"Blokes didn't invent fingers though, did they?" retorted CAB.

BW's little bro was flabbergasted. We all laughed at him.

"Looks like you lost, go get some drinks in!" laughed BW.

So... yeah... an enjoyable semi-conversation with USHW today and an enjoyable memory of CAB. 

Sigh.

KfW2 called as I was getting on  the bus earlier. Was I free for lunch on Friday? Or if I wasn't was I free for an hour to go for a walk and some fresh air because she misses me and we've not seen each other since, what, March?

But she'd have to go and collect the kids from school.

So, a rushed affair. Not the lunch "date" I'd have liked - having a leisurely lunch, some drinks and then a couple of hours chilling in a bar, chatting.

It nearly always seems to turn out like this. KfW2 even  managed to mention that she'd just spent a lot of money on clothes for her kids - a school uniform for next year. She didn't say outright that she couldn't afford our usual afternoon out, but it felt like it was being implied.

I always feel bad complaining about this aspect of KfW2 because she did call me, she did offer to do something, and that's more than a lot of friends of mine would have done.

But I have been looking forward to going to a nice restaurant, hitting a nice bar and having some quality time with a friend.

Long time, no speak.

It's been ages since i last spoke to KfW2. I know she's off tomorrow, so I might give her a call and catch up on life and see if there's any movement on us getting dinner and drinks.

Checking in?

Remember the WhatsApp chat I mentioned a few weeks back? There's still no activity in it. The people who have started it have taken no responsibility at all for trying to arrange something. Why even bother?