Friday funday.

I arrived early. I actually think I was the first non-organiser there. A brief, somewhat stilted chat with Ideas Girl and off I went into the sunshine with a cold beer.

I drank a lot. It's the good weather. I always seem to drink quicker when the weather's nice.

I also got to have a good few chats with Quiet Girl. I had thought she was going to turn up with us, but her other work friends changed their minds and were in attendance, after all. I also managed to spark Stalky Guy's incredulous nature by having a couple of chats with one of the HR girls - an ex of GM - a stunning looking blonde girl. Any time I chat to her, Stalky Guy's jaw drops. Stalky Guy is weird.

It looked as if we would have QG's company at the end of the night. There was talk of heading into the city afterwards for further drinks and Quiet Girl seemed keen. Another girl I was talking to (let's call her Nerdy Girl, she might pop up more often) seemed keen as well. So that was all promising until there was a transport issue and we kinda got split up.

At that stage, I called it quits. Quiet Girl had called her husband who took her home, Nerdy Girl had disappeared and the guys I had been socialising with had already gone into the city.

Still... the disappointing ending aside, it was a good night, and I did at least end up with Quiet Girl's number. Not that I plan on doing anything with that...

Oof.

The good weather and feeling rather pleased with myself has meant I had a beer to celebrate. Then another. And another.

I'm six beers in, rather quite tipsy and wishing I wasn't in work tomorrow.

But it's our summer thing and the weather's going to be fantastic again, which means the likes of the HR girls will be out in force in sun dresses and the like. Plus, I was talking Quiet Girl into coming along, which she agreed to, and I'm interested in finding out if she's pregnant. She said a few things last time that made me wonder.

Go me!

I took a sneaky day off work today. You have to, really, don't you? If the weather's nice (it's fantastic actually) and it's in short supply, you have to grab each opportunity with both hands.

And I did.

I got a lie in, managed to get my back garden into some kinds of semi-respectable shape, did a couple of things around the house, had a quick chat with the neighbour and now I'm feeling pretty pleased with myself.

I might go and sit in the garden for a while with a beer as well.

Double take.

I've often commented how, at certain times, the lovely Alison Brie resembles CH. And she does - at least at times when she gives a certain smile.

Like this:

Or this:

Especially in that last photo. I think it's a combo of the smile and hairstyle (CH's was worn slightly shorter, but was essentially the same thing).

But fuck me, if this didn't pop up on the internet today, another picture of Alison Brie, this time being a spitting image of QC2:

[Note: This is not the picture in question. It disappeared in the great image purge of 2023. Suffice it to say that AB's resemblance to CH has lessened over the years from her Community days, presumably due to ageing and her embracing of fitness, which has meant some weight loss, and these days she's more likely to resemble QC2, which in itself is not a bad thing seeing as I had a crush on both women.]

I don't know how interested you are in how much Alison Brie looks like ex-crushes of mine, but any excuse to post a picture or two of a good-looking woman.

Boo!

Not only was KfW2 out on Saturday night, but she was also out on Friday night. Listen, she can go out socialising any time she wants, but it's still well over two years since we had our last adult night out. She made all the right noises, though asking me to go to hers because she can't afford a night out kinda has a hollow ring to it when she's just gone out on the piss two nights in a row, one of which was in the city. As I always maintain, the words mean nothing if not backed up by actions. At this stage, we're looking at about a month before we can think about a night out. It's likely to be longer. Sigh.

Yay.

I was chatting with Quiet Girl today about whether or not she was coming along to our big summer bash thingy. Think a great kid's party with bouncy castles and stuff but with added alcohol and hatchet throwing. Last year, at the same event, was the first time I think I properly had a chat with her (ignoring the stilted bus conversation from years ago).

She seemed undecided, so I tried to cajole her into coming along with a few of us (including Stalky Guy). She said she was on a bit of an alcoholic free beer kick. My first thought was that she was pregnant... or at least trying to get pregnant. Is that sexist of me? I've no idea what age she is - she could be anywhere in her thirties to be honest.

Still, I think I managed to talk her into coming along as part of our group. It certainly beats talking to Stalky Guy all night long.

It's Over!

After two long years, a lack of recognition and a couple of arguments with KfW2, the pain-in-the-ass project has been handed in. There are some tidy up pieces to do but the big, important work is done.

It wasn't all smooth sailing. An unexpected and un-diagnosed technical issue meant there was a rapid response call, but the solution was easy albeit time consuming. There may be an autopsy on it tomorrow, but I don't know there's a lot I could have done to mitigate the damage (which was minimal).

So, I'm in pretty good form right now (unless things get all blame-y tomorrow).

And that's even with pictures on Facebook of KfW2 out and about with a group of female friends (I don't know any of the faces). We still haven't had our night out yet.

The Longest Day

It's the summer solstice in the UK aka the longest day, bod boy does it feel it!

While I feel I slept well last night, I have been super tired all day long. I can't nap or anything, so I'll battle through until bedtime... and I have an early start tomorrow, sometime between 3 and 4 AM.

However, that's to finish off a project that's been a thorn in my side for almost two years. I should get kudos for it (did I post about this before?) but my department has extremely high standards, so it's almost impossible to go the extra mile.

I'm hoping tonight goes well. I think it should. I've done as much preparation as I can, if something has been missed then that's up to someone else. I've done my bit. I'm both excited (to have reached the end) but stressed (in case I've missed something or something goes wrong).

Either way, it'll be over at lunchtime tomorrow.

Sigh.

So we're back being pissed at KfW2 for her professional greediness. She has been asking me to share some of our documentation for use in her new team. We were very innovative, and managed to remove most of the superfluous rubbish so that our paperwork was lean. A few people were involved in doing that over the years, with me as the driving force. She and a few others did help, but their input was minor compared to me being the leader.

Now that KfW2 has a new team, she's using these ideas and presenting them as her own. For this, I have no issues. I'd do exactly the same and it's not like we're losing out. But she's come to me for information around why we made these changes, why we removed entire documents etc. so she can appear knowledgeable.

She asked another question today. I kinda answered it and jokingly asked for her to reward me in our recognition points. I'm doing very well in that this year and if the second half of the year goes the same way as the first, I should be within reach for one of the big prizes at the end of the year - usually an all-expenses paid weekend away.

"I'm not giving you points, you have to give me some for me helping you out behind the boss's back"

To be fair, she did help me out when asked and I did do it behind the boss's back, though I had to fight for it to be at a time that was suitable for me. Additionally, I only needed the help because KfW2 never wrote anything down. There was no training documentation, no reference material. I had to force her to create a shared space to store and share all the information as she was a single point of failure for the project. She wanted it to be that way because of the favouritism within the team. Completing the project would have gained her kudos and contributed greatly to a promotion, so she wanted to maintain control of it as the senior developer.

I don't blame her for wanting the kudos... I want recognition for doing my work to an excellent standard. I just think it's a bit off that she views the recognition as a zero sum game... and seemingly still does despite working in a separate team and department. I'm her friend, it's not like I'm a distant co-worker.

Oh dear.

So my kinda, sorta prediction about CC was eventually right. She's single again, having decided that this long term thing with her man wasn't working out. She's been single for about a week now,  but only confessed to me tonight.

"It might not be over," she admitted only a few minutes into our conversation.

"I will kick your ass if you get back with him" I told her. I wasn't being a dick though.

I explained further:

• Long distance wasn't working for her... or him. Restarting something long distance was just repeating the same mistake without anyone learning lessons or circumstances changing.
• Long distance relationships are tough to maintain, tougher to start.
• People don't tend to make big changes, quickly. Some people don't change at all, some require time to adjust.
• Maybe don't call it "over" per se, but if he's ever back in the country, permanently, and the spark is still there, maybe think about it then?

She seemed to take all this on board.

She asked about GM. She always had a soft spot for GM. He's single to the best of my knowledge, but his fuck buddy is definitely angling for more. She already has him stepping way out of the FwB zone with weekends away etc. GM knows this, but as he's getting laid when he wants, he's willing to let it flow until it ultimately explodes. Of course, I didn't tell CC this.

When we parted, I offered company, if she wanted it, or to chat. Despite being the one to call it off, I think she's pretty cut up about it.

Pondering.

Is it against online dating rule to continue "Super Liking" the same girl on Tinder if she keeps appearing as a potential match?

I think I've mentioned this girl before - a cute local celebrity. She's popped up on Tinder a good few times now over the past year or so, so I keep Super Liking her. She's never replied, mind you. Is this regarded as creepy or anything?

I mean, I don't think it is, so I keep doing it... but I can't help but feel that my radar may be way off on this one.

Co-indincidence.

A few weeks ago. while out on an unexpected night out with E and ES, ES and I got talking about online dating. Ultimately, though rather surprisingly, we've had roughly the same success i.e. one date. She, on the other hand, has had many more conversations than I have.

Actually, that seems to be true of anyone I know who has done online dating or dating apps.

Which reminds me, ES recommended Elite Singles. If I get into "proper" online dating again, I'll give it a try.

With ES's comments ringing in my ears, I dipped my toe in again... well, I fired up Tinder, which I do every now and again anyway and lo and behold , a cute girl, giving off a vibe who took my fancy. A vibe of what, I can't tell. Not recognition, but there was something familiar about her. So I swiped right, of course.

Fast forward to today. Browsing a friend's Facebook profile due to an interesting post that she made, there's a familiar head shot belonging to someone who also commented. The cute girl from Tinder.

Interesting that we have mutual friends, given my friend herself lives over 100 miles away.

And the Tinder girl is still giving off a vibe that I can't put my finger on.

Bus wanker!

I lost my wallet today... more specifically, I left it on the bus when I sat in a daydream and jumped up when I realised it was my stop.

Usually, I put my wallet back in my pocket after swiping onto the bus, but today I was distracted by the weather app on my phone. I need it to be dry for about a week. I'm not exaggerating when I saw the grass in my back garden it knee high, but I can't tackle it until it's dry.

So I plonked myself down on the seat on the bus, peering at my phone, with the wallet sitting on the seat next to me.  When I got up to leave, the wallet stayed where it was

Luckily, there was no cash in the wallet - I rarely carry cash these days. So even if I don't get the wallet back, I'll be out maybe £25 of journeys left on my travel pass and the cost of a new wallet. All my cards have been cancelled, though there was no activity on any of them.

All the new cards should arrive within a week, so I have the ability, thanks to my bank's mobile app, to left cash, so I'm not massively inconvenienced.

Still, it's a distraction that I can do without.

Big sigh.

I am exhausted.

A year ago, KfW2 moved to another team due to a promotion. In her wake, she left a massive technical upgrade project that she had been running for a year. None of it was documented - all the information was in emails or in her head or in scribbled notes.

KfW2 has never been great at documenting or sharing information. I was tasked with taking over and I was immediately stressed due to the scope and complexity of the project. I had panic attacks and told my boss how stressed I was.

After six weeks of finalising the work and being stressed the entire time, the project was put on hold, three weeks before the deadline. While I was glad to catch my breath and see the back of the project and the incompetent project manager, I just wanted it to finish so I could forget about it for good.

Since then, I've chipped away at it, getting pieces in place, writing up training packages, "how to" documents etc. with little or no thanks. Well, in two weeks time, the project will be over and the final bit will be delivered.

I was fine until a week ago until someone else that I have to deal with started asking questions. Questions that they should already know the answer to. That's kicked in the stress again. I've worked long days, updating all the documents to include as much information as I can. I've chaired a dozen or so meetings, to ensure that everyone knows what they're meant to be doing.

And yet, I can't shake the feeling that no-one's paying attention. You ever get that feeling where you keep asking people if they've any questions and no-one raises their hand even though you know they don't understand you? That's how I feel. Stressed and frustrated.

Two weeks can't come quick enough... but simultaneously I don't know if there's enough time to get everything done.

Sigh.

For the past few years, I've been chasing a promotion in work. I've been more than open about it to my boss and his boss. In my opinion, I've done more than enough to warrant a promotion both in terms of what I have delivered and in behaviours (leading, innovations, flexibility etc.)

A year ago Stalky Guy was, IMO, given a free promotion. He didn't want it (assuming he'd have extra responsibilities), but he was talked round by our boss who made no secret of the fact he wanted to promote from within the team rather than shake up the status quo and Stalky Guy was always seen as a bit of a teacher's pet. So off he went to the easiest interview in the world, where he got the promotion and a nice little seven or eight percent pay rise.

Cut to a week or so ago. Another guy from our team left and there was a gap. My boss said he needed to fill the position, implying bringing in extra bodies. I was tempted to apply for it, just to be cheeky, but I didn't want to have a conversation with my boss to tell me I wasn't allowed to apply. Nor were there any encouraging noises from any of my bosses that applying was something they wanted like there were for Stalky Guy. Plus, I've been of the opinion that my progression has been blocked by these people. The evidence of my performance is clear and objective, so there has to be some other reason I'm overlooked (hint: two other guys in my team are favoured)

A few days ago, Stalky Guy confided in me that my boss had said he wanted me to apply for the job when they were interviewing. I was angry. If my boss had made the suggestion, I'd have gone for it. I'd not have been happy - in my mind, I shouldn't have to apply for a vacancy to get a promotion - but still, it would have been a pay-rise somewhere around what Stalky Guy got. But he said nothing.

Then today, after everyone else had left the office, my boss trundled over and asked me outright why I hadn't applied. I said everything that I've mentioned above - he'd implied he was looking for extra bodies and I took him literally, no-one said it was open to me, I'd had private 1-2-1 conversations with both him and his boss and neither of them even hinted at the job. He said he was angry/disappointed. I think that's more to do with not getting his way (I get the feeling he didn't want extra bodies, and my non-application has given him a headache he could do without) than an opportunity to promote me being wasted.

Weird

Sometimes I wonder. I hadn't heard from E since we last spoke late on Tuesday night. I was trying to juggle three different things: meeting E, getting FP out and potentially arranging to introduce E and KfW2 - two women who are very close and important to me.

But I needed E to tell me what was going on - times, venues and that stuff. I'd asked a few times and gotten vague responses.

KfW2 was out and about in town and was staying over at mine. E was out with friends and ES. FP and I were trying to figure out what was going on.

By the time E (via ES) sent a text to let me know the arrangements, it was well after 9 PM. The taxi companies were quoting an hour to get a cab. I had only planned to go out for an hour or so anyway - a combination of exhaustion (chasing after KfW2's kids all afternoon, being awake from 4 AM) and wanting to avoid the post-pub rush.

I had been tetchy all day and in the lead up to the text message arriving, I had changed my mind several times about whether I would even go out. I'd at least hedged my bets and was suited and booted, just in case. As it turns out, the taxi companies made my decision for me.

I don't do FOMO, but I was disappointed that I couldn't introduce E and KfW2.

I had a few beers in the house while watching some films and eventually went to bed at 1 AM. Despite the exhaustion, it took a while to get to sleep.

I was awoken by KfW2 knocking on the door of my bedroom at some point and launching herself onto the bed. She was just a little bit tipsy. We chatted for a bit - only a few minutes - and she left to make a cup of tea with her husband.

That provoked a tinge of something from two angles - I like that she was comfortable enough in our friendship to do that (though it kinda goes against the fact she won't even stay over if she's alone) and also that  KfW2 had gotten ready to go out at mine and she had looked stunning when she left. Having a stunning looking woman launch herself onto my bed at 3 AM is not something that has happened at any time recently. It would be nice if it happened again, only with someone who belonged in my bed.

Chatty.

Despite the fact we live only about 200 m apart (as the crow flies), and we work beside each other (well, about 3 m apart) and that we both get the bus into work, on the same route, I've only ever seen Quiet Girl on the bus once and it was one of the most difficult conversations I've ever had.

Well, that was the case until today when QG ambled up to the bus stop and stopped beside me. This time, we actually know each other and I expected a conversation.

I wasn't disappointing and we spent the entire bus journey talking about all sorts, until it was time for me to disembark. She lives slightly further along the bus route.

Not exactly news-worthy, but life is quite dull at the moment and I am quite devoid of any energy.

Good times.

Sadly, the night out with E and ES wasn't the alcohol-fuelled party time that I had anticipated. I don't think it was an unreasonable assumption to make. The last time E, ES, myself and a few others went out, it was a horrifically drunken affair where everyone had a great time. That must be easily five or six years ago.

ES and I ended up outside, having a smoke, with ES telling me that she was "gagging for a fuck" and me telling her that there were plenty of men in the bar and that she could get laid that night if she wanted to. However, ES is not a one-night stand person. She might be a FwB/FB person... I did get that from our conversation, but not a one-and-done person.

Well, despite the lack of alcohol, ES and I ended up in a similar conversation - online dating. She hasn't dated in ages and neither have I. We discussed success rates (hers is better than mine, though not by much) and moved on to general dating.

I've contemplated trying to set ES and GM up on a blind date. While my head says they might not hit it off, my gut tells me differently.

ES is a combination, personality-wise, of SG and V. All spiritual and flighty wrapped up in an attractive woman. Would GM like that? He did date SG who is a flighty nutter wrapped up in an attractive package.

While last night's night out was late-notice and unexpected, I had already arranged to see E next week before she leaves, but another invite came as we made our way home for this Saturday night. That might actually give me a chance to introduce E to KfW2, if the plans don't change.

Hot date tonight!

A girl with a great rack and a girl who who's an ex-model.

I'm thinking threesome, for sure.*

*Not really... it's an unexpected night out with E and ES.

Meh.

I woke this morning, after an alcohol and sport fuelled evening, with an overwhelming desire to have someone wrapped around me. It wasn't sex... just more a want/need for companionship.

Still... hangover free, which is a bit of a surprise, but I still predict a VERY lazy Sunday.