Planning.

Well, after weeks of nothing from E, I got around to contacting her myself. I've made it clear that I can't do anything until she gets back to me (and I've also opened the door for us to meet up before we do our week-long travelling thing). I'd like to have everything booked by this weekend at the very latest. One of E's friends (I think I've mentioned her before) has sent me a link for Facebook, but it seems to be broken cos I can't find her. I'm tempted to get in contact to see what she says.

Still not written to V. I always have a hard time contacting people and when it's a girl that I'm kinda interested in, it's always difficult for me because I'm always super-paranoid that I come across as a desperate, slobbering idiot.

Still... managed to get out with G last night for a few pints. He was home for the weekend with the family, so it's harder and harder to get him out these days, but we still grabbed a few hours for some banter and catching up. I've tentatively agreed to visit him in the summer, but that's all kinda for the future, after my travelling.

...

Somewhere out of left field, I ended up having a dream about V last night. I can only remember vague details where I think part of the dream was in a bar with V and a few friends (hers and mine) and I was off getting drinks and when I cam back to the the table, V was being very positive about me to two female friends of hers and I overheard her. I woke up shortly after that.

I'm not entirely sure what it means, if anything. As I've said before, FBS was a little more into the dream interpretation thing, but regardless, it was nice to wake up this morning with that "memory", even if it was all false. I was in a fairly good mood all day because of that, too though I still haven't written the email.

And yet more totty...

This time of a more adult nature... I believe this girl goes by the name of "Posh Suicide", and is usually found in advanced states of undress and she's gorgeous. She reminds me of someone, but I can't think who. It might be a celebrity or could be someone I've crossed paths with, but I just can't remember.

Not that it matters much... *drool*

Other stuff

E's not been in con tact for a while which is concerning because I kinda need to her to verify a few details before I can finalise my own details.

Qc2's meant to be in contact soon about heading out for a night. I'm looking forward to that, plus there are a few things in the pipeline for the near future that should keep me busy, socially, until I head off travelling.

Silence...

Just as quickly as FA2 appeared, demanding answers to questions than she's gone again. I've not heard from her in a few days after her last somewhat cryptic message (that I replied to). She hasn't outed the source, though I am as sure as I can be without the confirmation that it's BW. As such, I've not said anything about Kiwi Girl. I've also removed a couple of Facebook applications... I'm sick and tired of people I don't talk to sending invites for crappy things or starting games of stuff without asking. It's OK for my friends and people I talk to regularly to do that, but not these people that don't make that effort (FA2 being only one of a few).

I'm still struggling with my email to V. I just can't seem to get the tone right. It's hard because we did have a bond (note the past tense) and I would like to see if we could regain that by swapping news every now and again, plus there's always the outside chance we could see each other again. It's not a big chance, but it's a lot more likely than, for example, bumping into Kiwi Girl again. The tone of the email I had written just seemed, I dunno, perhaps a little over zealous and I'm paranoid that she thinks I just want between her legs (which I guess I do, but that's not the reason for trying to rekindle/renew the friendship).

Contact...

Eventually, FA2 got back to me again on the same comment thread as her previous questions about Kiwi Girl, but this time, she never mentioned her. She asked a question about if I'd done something on Facebook. The answer was in the negative, of course. I told FA2 that Facebook was just a means to an end to get contact details from people that I'd lost contact with and that eventually, I planned to give Facebook up completely.

She knows all this, or could guess. My opinions and points of view on how frequently my friends get in contact should be well known to FA2. That she chooses to forget or ignore them and then put her foot in it is her problem, not mine. It is weird that she won't simply tell me who told her about Kiwi Girl. The whole Kiwi Girl thing is not a big secret, but damnit, why should FA2 just bounce in to my life after a few years of non-contact and start making demands on information about my personal life? Giving up a name would have been a small price to pay, you would have thought. Apparently not.

On the subject of contact and Facebook, I notice that V added another friend yesterday. Thanks to Facebook's rather weird notification system, that titbit of information was a lot more prominent than the fact an old school friend (well, acquaintance really) accepted my friendship request and added me to her list of friends. It's disappointing, nut I was planning on contacting V using non-Facebook methods anyway. It's just a matter of writing the email and getting the tone right.

FA2

After my initial refusal (or more accurately dodging) of FA2's request for details on Kiwi Girl, there was some further pouting from FA2. I had indicated that if she 'fesses up to the "leak", that I'd be more inclined to spill the beans, but oh no.

FA2 pouts about being miles away and not in contact with anyone... but she's in contact enough with someone to question my private life. [insert angry smilie here]

Anyway, I repeated that I would be more inclined to be vocal if she tell me who's spouting off about my private life. That was a few days ago... I've heard nowt since.

Typical.

Yay

E has been in contact. Things are looking good so far and she's offered to go off, research some stuff and put together a list of ideas. What she has so far is looking extremely promising though!

All I have to do now is fill in the gaps. I have about a week and a half to fill in between arriving and meeting up with E. I should get my nose into my travel books and see what to do.

More totty!

Hannah Spearitt.

I don't normally go for blondes, but still... yummy!

Well, I never!

FA2 has been in contact. Apparently someone has been passing on information regarding my near-dalliance with Kiwi Girl (or as much as they know coupled with some assumptions). I've replied, but I'm giving nothing away. I've asked who has been passing on this information. I kind of need to know (but my guess right now is BW) because I don't want FA2 to know that I'm going travelling soon and will be in her neck of the woods. I've no plans to visit her, so it'll just be easier if she doesn't know. Seeing as this is the first contact I've had from her in years that's not begging for some kind of help, the chances of us striking up a conversation are extremely slim. The only way she'd find out about my travel is through a third party. At the moment, only one person could tell her about my plans (and as he doesn't know about Kiwi Girl, I can rule him out as the "leak"). BW knows about Kiwi Girl (he was there for the initial meeting), but I'm not sure what he knows of my travelling plans, so he's the number one suspect.

Money, money, money...

Finally, all my bookings (travel and hotels) for the UK legs of my impending travel are now booked and locked down. I'm timing my trip through London to hopefully meet up with A, though as it's still six weeks away, she could get called away with work, so until I finally arrive in London and meet her, I'm assuming that things could change. A reckons I'd be a big hit with her work colleagues (some of whom appear to be easy on the eye), so no doubt I'll be introduced to them, too. 

A doesn't want stuff to change so that she's unavailable. She wants to meet me. I want to meet her, too. If she calls it off, I'm not sure what I'd do. I know tonnes of people that I could meet up with, but I guess it'll be G or RA, both of whom I really do owe a visit. 

On a slightly less positive side, I've yet to hear back from E. I'm guessing that'll happen at the weekend, but it is a little frustrating.

Bah.

After booking the travel for my trip to see E, I fired off a quick email yesterday as some of my travel arrangements depend on E's own plans. I was kinda hoping she would appear on MSN last night, but she never showed. I thought that, if she didn't check her email in time, she would have at least replied at some stage. However, it appears she never checked her email at all. I hope she does check it within 48 hours... I can't afford to hang around, waiting.

Onwards!

Today has been a day of ups and downs. The ups were that work went well. Further potential issues have been solved (or rather, were never issues at all) and the stuff that had been frustrating me for the past few days has all been cleaned up. Next week I start on a project to clean up the unholy mess from the end of last year, but, while time consuming, shouldn't bee too much trouble. I also got the go ahead from various people in the company to take extended leave this year, though the official permission came slightly too late for my liking (that was the "down").

That delay in getting official word from those that make the decisions means that the cost of my travelling has jumped by £150. I'm not impressed by that, but I have made the bookings for travel to see E. All I need to do now is sort out my insurance, travel to the airport (Heathrow) and various internal flights at my destination. That'll be the bare bones of my holiday sorted then I can sort out the finer details with E herself.

Ruuude's New Year post

I like the New Year. I like it a damned sight more than Christmas and any of that bollocks. It’s just a nice time to, reflect back on the past, take stock and look towards the future.

I prefer to spend it in the company of friends and/or family, but last night, I sat in alone, watching films. FP’s previously mentioned house party failed to materialise and the back up plan of us having drinks at his also failed to appear. That might have been because he was spending time in with the wife or it might be because it was a throwaway comment that was never going to become real. Either way, there was a certain amount of frustration yesterday as FP failed to follow up. I could have contacted him, of course, but that would just be me inviting myself up to his place, which is not the done thing.

My usual fallback of heading to my sister’s also didn’t happen. They usually call and invite me up, but that didn’t happen either.

I enjoyed watching the telly/movies (Bones, NCIS and Shoot ‘Em Up if you’re interested), but midnight was a bit of an anti-climax. With the usual network problems, text messages didn’t come through until around 3 AM, though I was still awake. That doesn’t bode well for my return to work tomorrow if I’m not getting to sleep until after 3 AM. Luckily, I shouldn’t be too busy this week, so can re-adjust without too much worry.

With that in mind, here are my hopes, wishes and goals for 2008:

Goals:

To become better at my job: I think some of the frustrations from last year have arisen because of mistakes I have made, professionally. It’s my goal to get rid of these silly errors (for that’s just what they are) and make life easier for me. I wasn’t solely to blame to all of the mistakes, but one or two were mine that could have been avoided. The others have cropped up due to bad luck, carelessness on the part of others and sheer bad training. I want to get rid of the kind of ones I’ve made, though.

Get another job: I know that might sound silly, given my goal above, but if I am to stay with my current employer and request a transfer, it could be some time before I actually get that move. I am still planning on requesting that move towards the middle of the year and I will probably look externally, too. I think the change would do me good. I’m still working on the same systems that I started working on three years ago when I first started with the company, I’ve just changed job descriptions and boredom is starting to set in.

Fitness etc.: I rejoined the gym last year and I’ve been playing football quite a lot, My goal is to keep the football going (which I’m playing once, sometimes twice, per week) and hopefully add at least one gym visit. The football keeps me fairly fit, but the additional night at the gym could mean the weight loss/toning that I’ve really wanted to achieve for some time, but never really got into.

Socialising: I need to increase my social circle... make new friends, preferably single ones or ones that will come out and do stuff. I sit in far too much and spend far too much time doing fuck all on the internet. I need people with whom I can go to the cinema, the pub, play sports and give me reasons to get out of the house.

To have a good time with E when I visit her in a few months: this is a given, really. Travel arrangements are being made and we’ll be fine tuning the details over the next dew weeks. It’ll be fabulous.

Hopes/Wishes:

GTA IV to be released on PC: at the moment, it’s only slated for a PS3 and Xbox 360 release. Converting from Xbox to PC should require a lot of effort, but to the best of my knowledge, it’s not been announced yet.

Another chance with Kiwi Girl: that’s still annoying me to a certain extent, probably because I was recounting the tale to a female cousin recently. This definitely falls into “wish” category, though and would probably disappear if this next one comes true...

A snog/shag/FB/girlfriend: again, as a result of the conversation with my cousin, my lack of non-platonic action with a female has been annoying me recently. Some kind of action this year would be welcome. (I suppose this could also fall under “goal”, but I guess this is as much out of my hands as I can get, so “wish” it is).

A lotto win: OK, so loads of people are looking for this, but I’m not asking for a lot. All I’m asking for is just enough to buy a house (or get me enough money where I can safely afford a mortgage for a house). Living at home at my age is embarrassing and really starting to annoy me and can be restrictive at times. I don’t particularly believe in renting (though I know this is my own point of view) as I think it’s an empty investment over a long period of time.

These are off the top of my head right now. I’m sure that speaking to family and friends over the course of the next week or so will add new ones and refine existing ones.