Definitely game over.

I woke this morning to an email from RB. Once I'd gotten over the surprise that she'd made contact, I read it and, as expected, it was a "thanks but no thanks" email.

She specifically mentioned that she thought I was looking for more than she was and that was her main reason for refusing further contact. Of course, I think she's wrong. Had she said something like "I think you're keener than I am", then I'd agree. I think I am... but then she's been someone I've been thinking about on and off since our original meeting about five weeks ago. RB's perspective is different as I effectively popped out of thin air about two weeks ago, so she might not have had as much time to consider our friendship.

The difference here is interpretation, I think. I've been pro-active in making contact, both in supplying original contact details, then calling her to ask her out on a date and then following up last week when she never made contact as promised. I don't think I've been too intense, especially given her silence but I can understand why or how she might come to her conclusion. I am disappointed that she's made that decision without meeting up at least one more time.

There's also the point that she was scared off because our one and only date went so well. Right at the end of the evening, she mentioned that she couldn't date because of issues/baggage but still wanted to get to know me. The fact that we were lying in her bed involved in some rather splendid kissing (and not for the first time) says to me that she was at least keen to a certain extent.

However, getting back to what RB said in her email, my attitude has always been simply to take each date/meeting as it comes and see how things pan out (with perhaps a vague notion that this might end up being a romantic rather than platonic relationship), or rather that was the plan until RB went AWOL. RB's attitude is almost the opposite... if there's an obstacle, then don't overcome it and if you can run away then do so. At least, that's my analysis based on the two meetings and subsequent events and various things that RB said. It seems that, for her, my assumed targets for our friendship were too large to overcome, despite this being the early stages of our friendship. Personally, I don't think it matters if I want more than her or not, as long as I don't force the issue and try to get RB into bed or any other non-platonic action. She would have to meet me socially to find that out, though.

I sent a final message thanking her for at least telling me (I chose not to mention that she should have done this last fucking week and that she might have acted her age) and that I disagreed with her assumptions, but true to my attitude throughout, I'm not closing any doors and mentioned if she changes her mind, I'd love to meet, as friends.