The date.

The tale is complicated, so I'm going to be very brief about this. The people that I want to know about this already have the full story (USHW - you should have a PM about it) and right now, I've no idea what to think/feel.

The date started well. I recognised her immediately when she arrived and she while she perhaps wasn't as pretty as I had remembered, she was still pretty. The date started slowly, albeit not awkwardly and we both seemed to have a good time.

During the evening, and before I got her into a taxi, I made some moves. Not big ones, but just small little things - things I said and did; the timing of which I seemed to get spot on. From my own perspective and from things that RB had said that evening, things were going amazingly well (and feedback from A on this backs up my own point of view). I was using a couple of things that E had told me about body language etc. and there were definite indicators of interest from her all night long.

Due to RB being quite drunk, the taxi business ended up being confusing and I ended up back at hers, despite this not being a goal of mine for our first proper date. In fact, I had explicitly stated near the end of the night that I would get her a taxi and see my self home as I wanted to see her again. We live in different directions, so the goal was always two taxis, but she was insistent I got into the taxi that was going back to hers so I suggested I'd call a cab from there.

Back at hers, there was a bit of snogging on the sofa, then we ended up in bed again (she asked me to stay, but made it perfectly clear that nothing was going to happen) where some more snogging started when, all of a sudden she stops and claims that she can't do dating, that there is something in her past that she hasn't yet dealt with. RB apologised for this, for "leading me on" and stated a desire to be friends.

Given her nature when she's drunk (being aggressive as a defensive measure), I had thought this was perhaps something like that, but the next day when I mentioned that I'd had a great time and would love to do it again, she reiterated the friendship claim. When I expressed my disappointment and mentioned that I had held some hopes that this would go a different route, she seemed quite dismissive of my point of view.

We left on reasonably good terms with a tentative plan to see each other this week. I'm kinda hoping that she talks to her friends (all girls do, don't they?) and they encourage her to change her mind and to give the dating thing a proper go.

I'm not sure how I feel about all of this. I'll need to sort myself out tomorrow.