I'm not great at meeting new people. I never have been and I think it's been a real monkey on my back over the years. It really used to annoy FA2 who could never understand it, but she never saw me vomit because I was so nervous. Things like job interviews etc. are difficult, but there's nothing more difficult than meeting family and friends of people I'm close to. Fuck knows why.
E's birthday celebrations were a prime example. While I wasn't physically ill, I still had that nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach even though there was nothing to be nervous about. Meeting FA2's family and friends was exactly the same. I think the issue is that I have no confidence in my ability to start conversations and everything stems from that.
Things were different with USHW and A (to name but two examples) as I had "met" them over the internet where things were slightly different to actually standing in front of someone and having to be involved in a conversation. I've always been a much better listener than a talker.
Anyway, I've been a little nervous all day long because of the last week. It's not because RB's a potential girlfriend or a potential fuck or a potential friend... it's because she's someone new and I'll have to sit down with her and chat for a couple of hours and hopefully be funny or interesting enough that she'll want to do it again . Erk... no pressure, eh?
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