So, in a move that's completely in line with expectations about how our company does things, but not what I was hoping for, the thing I'm working towards is tomorrow. Not next week as I'd hoped. And it's a completely different format than I was expecting. So I've wasted dozens of hours since last week, researching, typing up notes and dredging my memory to collate things that would have helped. And I only got the email this morning, giving me 28 hours notice.
Now? Now I have to think about something else entirely, and it'll last six times longer than I was anticipating. Imagine preparing for a 30 minute IQ test, only to be told with 24 hours notice that it's a 3 hour dexterity test, but you don't know what type. That's kinda where I am at the moment. Stressed. Panicking. Worried that I'll make a dick of myself. And all that will culminate in not achieving what I want.
I think that's awful behaviour from the company. 24 hours notice is awful. Using a different format than usual, with no warning, is awful. Having someone there who I don't particularly trust is awful.
Roll on tomorrow night. Calorie counting be damned, it'll be beer time.
EDIT: I have spent the entire afternoon panicking and contemplating just withdrawing from the process, but I know that's counter-productive. I need to face this. Yes, it might go wrong. I might be out of my depth. But my imagination might be (and probably is) conjuring up the worst possible scenarios.
No comments:
Post a Comment