Weekend roundup.

I spent the weekend chasing S. He had a friend over from London and the entire weekend was spent around hosting her and her friend. That's not a criticism, by the way, just explaining how it was. On Thursday, we were meeting for a few drinks and some pool. However, S didn't phone until after 10 PM by which time I had given up on the idea of going out (plus I had work the next day).

A similar thing happened on Friday, with the phone call not coming until well after 11 PM.

It was Saturday before the stars aligned and S was organised enough to do stuff on time. FC was out, as was GM and Sports Girl. SG had been in contact a few days before.

"Oh, I've missed you, it's been so long!" she declared.

I didn't type it out directly, but my reply implied that our lack of contact was her fault. And it is. SG and GM  have been socially invisible since they got together as a couple, around six months ago. FC gets to see them sometimes, but only because of sporting connections.

It was no surprise to see that, when SG and GM finally showed up on Saturday, that they never made any attempt to mingle with the people that S had invited out. It looked to me like GM wanted to, but SG never let him go for one second the entire evening.

I was also semi-expecting a message from CC. It was her birthday as well on Saturday and she was out with a few friends. I suggested that if she let me know where she was, I'd buy her a drink if I were close enough. That message didn't come, however.

KfW2 had promised a phone call as well. She's been a little down recently and I was hoping for a chance to chat and arrange our adult afternoon out. Via a few text messages though, she told me she was busy, but she will try and call soon. Hopefully we'll get something planned for within the next few weeks.

I text CC on Sunday morning. She had gotten drunk the night before. I noticed on Facebook that she was out with a girl that I'd previously matched with on Tinder. She'd de-activated or un-matched before I had a chance to message her though. I've never mentioned that to anyone, apart from USHW, so that may be something to consider, though my only previous attempt to meet someone through a mutual friend, CB, didn't yield any results. To be honest, cute Tinder girl is an outside bet anyway - her distance and family situation are not deal breakers, but certainly obstacles for me to overcome.

I also spoke with CC about exercise and she re-iterated her plan to join a gym after holiday (coincidentally with the cute Tinder girl), so that may be something that kicks in at the start of next month.

Hello.

Today got off to an interesting start. Sat on the bus on the way to work, who should I see at a bus stop on my route, but the cute, foreign, girl who works at my place? I think I've mentioned her in passing on the blog before, but a quick recap, just in case: she seems quiet, I don't know what age she is, I don't know where she lives (or rather, I didn't... I vaguely do now), she doesn't seem to go to our monthly work events and, a few years ago at the work Christmas party, I got her onto the dance floor to dance for a while, despite her being a stranger. We haven't had a proper conversation, and it's only reasonably recently that I actually found out her name.

She gets on the bus. She has a choice of seats available to her though she chooses to sit beside me. I panic. Well, not panic. I have a dilemma. She's barely looked at me since the Xmas party (though I had her laughing then, but a connection never developed) and I don't even remember her making eye contact with me at any time since, but it seems impolite not to at least acknowledge her presence. Do I take out my earphones and talk to her or continue looking out the window and listening to my Spotify playlist of music from films?

Good manners get the better of me and I remove my headphones.

I make a few statements and ask a few tentative questions, mainly around her living locally and getting the bus.

She replies, but they're brief... a few words at most. Is it shyness? Is she simply not wanting to talk?

My destination stop approaches (presumably hers too), so instead of trying to coax a conversation out of her on the short walk to the office, I cut my losses and walk to my local, regular coffee shop instead of heading into the office with her.

Ho hum.

Out tonight with S and his unrequited love. She's a good laugh, so I am looking forward to it. KfW2 has also said that she'll phone or call round tomorrow. I'm looking forward to that, too.

Plans.

My plan was that, after getting the weekend out of the way with FBS, D etc. that I'd chat to KfW2 about arranging an afternoon out. I know she enjoys our time together as much as I do - she said as much to me the last time we were out, so it's not a chore. It's just a matter of logistics - arranging babysitters etc.

However, she's a little down in the dumps at the moment. Her eldest has literally just left for university, possibly never to return to the family home (at least permanently). I often think that people like KfW2 and her eldest have a closer bond than others, because KfW2 and the father of her eldest are not together and boyfriends have been and gone. For a long time, while she's never uttered the phrase, it was just "the two of them against the world".

While she might well need one of our afternoons out, it seems inconsiderate to suggest it. Why? I don't know. We had a tentative agreement that we'd do it after the university upheaval, so it's not as if it'd be unexpected and our window of opportunity to have such an afternoon our is rapidly closing.

I'll leave it a few days and suggest something then.

As far as other plans go, CC is off on holiday next week. When she returns, I'm hoping to have a chat with her about joining the local gym that I've talked about previously and possibly engaging a PT for a bit. Maybe not multiple times a week, but perhaps a couple of times per month, just as a milestone kinda thing. I did it with GC years ago and noticed an improvement in tone, upper body strength etc. and that was just going to the gym maybe once per week and not really altering diet and seeing GC once per month. Even doing my yoga on a daily basis a few years ago, a few people from work noticed a difference after three months.

CC is talking about going to the gym at least twice per week, with some home stuff (my yoga), seeing a PT twice per month and making small changes to my diet (portion management, cutting out some stuff like bread and crisps and eating a little more healthily), then I would hope to see real changes.

I'm also hoping to have a chat with her about maybe doing stuff together to meet new people. I don't know if CC is actively looking to date/meet people (she seems happy enough with her lot, but then again, I probably do to her) or if she even has issues meeting people. I fail to see how - she's an attractive woman, decent body, and personable, so unlike me, I could see her getting plenty of offers.

We meet again!

KfW2 has always been intrigued by my circle of friends. Specifically, that I'm still in regular contact with people I've known since primary school - G is one of these people. While I wouldn't claim to be friends with another guy, we were in pretty much every primary school class and secondary school class and even ended up working for the same company for a while. In my early twenties, I played in the same football team as another primary school classmate.

Why the sudden talk about primary school? Well, Facebook has been very active this weekend with talk of another reunion. I'll probably go, though these things are really of no interest to me. I'm already in contact with the few people I want to be, the one or two people that I would like to talk to (including my first real crush), I'm already friends with on Facebook. The only missing person is one girl I had a minor crush on.

It all depends on dates and venues, though they're likely to be local.

Just... stuff.

BR and G have been and gone and, as predicted, it was a drunken one. It was good to catch up along with M and MM, though the second night out with G never happened. It's a shame, but G's communication these days is poor. I'm less concerned that I didn't get a second night in the pub and more concerned that he couldn't have sent a quick text message rather than FP and myself being left in the dark.

Ho hum.

Sadly, MMBF and E3 never appeared. I was never going to pull them, but a man can window shop and they are cute. The only other piece of "news" is that one of our old school friends, a loud girl who I don't particularly like, got talking to me about meeting people and dating. I ended up telling them about my online dating experiences and the results, that I did want to meet people and that I wasn't that interested in people with kids, but admitted if the chemistry was there. I was about to launch into my theory about how online dating encouraged box ticking and how people seemed to be unwilling to meet people without finding out if there was chemistry by meeting, but we got side-tracked by G's arrival.

I doubt anything will come of it, though loud girl did suggest a blind date, which I avoided agreeing to.

It was a good night. That's that one ticked off. Next up - FBS, D and Friction Guy this coming weekend. I also have KfW2 and a night out with S's unrequited love before the end of the month.

Looking forward.

Despite G's sister claiming that he was home for the Bank Holiday weekend, there was no contact from him over the weekend nor did he reply to my last text message for clarification of his visit.

That means it's this coming weekend that he's home (or he's gone home already without seeing anyone). BR and his wife are due in town as well, but I don't know if we'll all be out together. I don't even know if G knows that BR will be in town. If not, then it'll be busy weekend and, either way, it'll be drunken.

The weekend after is a long-overdue night out with D, FBS, Friction Guy and Opinionated Guy. Again, that's going to be drunken.

The last thing on the cards, at the moment, is my re-scheduled day out with KfW2. Dates are still to be decided, but we're unlikely to do that until after my night with FBS etc.

Pondering.

CH finally replied, though it took me to send her birthday wishes to do so. That being said, a family illness meant that my original message has slipped her mind. She's not available for at least a couple of weeks, but I've asked her to get in touch with me once she is. Fingers crosses, but as always with CH, I'm not holding my breath.

Something else that slipped my mind from earlier in the week was CC's suggestion we join a gym. There's one that's literally about a 10 minute walk or a 3 minute drive. That works on a couple of levels - firstly, it's handy and secondly, if CC is going, then I have my motivation to go too.

It seems to be a little more hardcore than your Fitness Firsts, Pure Gyms or David Lloyds. There's more emphasis on weights than cardio machines (though they have those too). Plus all the photos are of boys and girls who are ripped. Mind you, that's not my goal.

Oh, and it's cheap. Cheap enough that if I get into a routine of going, I could add a couple of PT sessions a month to keep me on track.

However, just the thought of going down there, even for a look around is already making me anxious. It's something to definitely give some thought, but the anxiety though...

So, what's happening now?

And so it begins again. CH hasn't replied to a text I sent over a week ago asking to meet her for coffee. I had planned to use that coffee date as a springboard to get her out of an evening. It's also her birthday sometime around now. I can't remember exactly when in August it is, but it was around this time. That time we were out that she sent some interesting text messages on her way home. Was that about two years ago?

During the brief text conversation we had (we were both a little tipsy), she made these comments:

"Thank you for the card you have no idea what that means to me"
"Thank you for being you and weirdly appreciating me"
"And in the relatively short time we have known each other... The scale on which I trust your judgement is unreal"

That was why, when it all fell apart, communications-wise, that I had thought she was over-reacting. I also knew I hadn't been out of line. Mild criticism is no reason to to have the reaction that CH did.

That's all under the bridge now... except for the fact that the issues with CH being controlling are still there. She makes all the calls. If she doesn't like something, the alternatives are on her terms, not any compromise.

And her communications have always been shocking.

Still, it's not like I've nothing else to do. I was meant to be out yesterday with KfW2, but that's been postponed for a few weeks while she gets some family stuff sorted. Nothing seriously bad, but it needs done now.

G is home soon. It could be this weekend. His sister told me it was the bank holiday weekend, but G's own texts suggest it might be the following weekend. He still hasn't clarified, despite asking. My weekend this weekend is quiet anyway. I've taken a couple of days off work to chill a little, so if G is over, I'm free. I've no other plans this weekend.

The following weekend, obviously, G might be over. BR and his wife are definitely in town. That'll mean that others will be out including M and MM, possibly E3, hopefully MMBF (though she's an outside bet at best).

<--- --->

This caught my eye today, following links on Facebook.

World map of average (erect) penis size.

Hah!

Interesting.

While searching for a friend on Facebook earlier, DSC's name popped up. Bored, I clicked on her name. It appears that she's single again. I don't know any further details, but it doesn't kinda explain the out of the blue texts from a while ago.

Part of me is glad for her. The guy she was with at the time we stopped talking was an idiot. Seriously. He was a Grade-A Man Child. Plus he had other character traits that weren't particularly nice - like overt bigotry, for example.

I'm still not tempted to get in touch though. I still don't do flaky.

Thanks, but no thanks.

After the brief period of enthusiasm and activity on my many online dating accounts recently, someone finally popped up who looked cute and interesting and within my basic search criteria. Her profile wasn't brilliant - typically bland and... something else that I can't describe or put my finger on. Homely, maybe? However, her profile pictures suggested a sense of adventure that her words didn't.

It was three words - "looking for love". I'm not going to say it put me off, but it made me assume that she was of a particular personality type that I'm not particularly looking for. I want someone with their own personality. I've often cited KfW2 and CH as being examples of that exact type.

Physically, she's attractive - pretty, nice smile, brunette.

So, I fired off a message, asking about some of her pictures (which are all travel-related).

It took her over two and a bit days to reply, which was short and closed off. I was reasonably sure, though not certain, that it wasn't inviting a reply, but I wanted to make sure, so I asked her a few more questions - dripped a bit of personal information in there and fired it off.

That was Thursday night and I've heard nothing since, though she's been online quite a bit (often, and for hours at a time), updated her profile pictures (not the blurb though, which is telling in itself). I'm not expecting a reply at this point, but I have to wonder why people can't communicate properly.

The girl's message answered questions I'd asked, but there was no element of "thanks, but you're not what I'm looking for" or similar. She's have been better off not sending any kind of reply. I know it's difficult. I've always moaned about how difficult it is meeting people on dating sites and I try to reply to anyone who messages me who has put any kind of effort into an opening message ("Hi" simply doesn't cut it). But I always make it clear that I'm not open to prolonging the conversation and wish them all the best in their search.

Attractive Neighbour really impressed me with her messages. I was pretty sure she wasn't my type, but I sent messages anyway. We swapped a few messages each and I wished her well. She was interesting, interested and positive, all traits that online dating sites don't tend to be. If everyone were like AN, places like PoF would perform much better, I think.

Why is communication so difficult for some people?