A whole heap of something.

I've only been properly house hunting for just over a week now and it's safe to say that I already hate estate agents. I've only viewed about five houses so far, two at the very top of my price range needed too much work, a couple in some streets I didn't fancy and one that my sister and I looked at around this time last week.

I'm not going to say that I loved it, but I did like it - plenty of character, nice street, low price though a little lacking on daytime living space and outside space (the bedrooms etc. were brilliantly sized though).

I went home and talked it through with my sister. After mulling it over the weekend, I decided that I needed a second viewing. The estate agent called me today to inform me that there was an offer on, just under the asking price. this was at 10 AM. I didn't take the call because I was snowed under at work, but picked up the voicemail at lunchtime.

I hurriedly tried to contact my sister or my brother-in-law to arrange a second viewing (they're my voice of reason and have much more house buying experience than I do). It was 4 PM by the time either of them agreed to a time and date for availability and I phoned the estate agent. It went to voice mail. I left a message - interested in the property, would love a second viewing, could they arrange something later this week, mid-evening?

However, they immediately called me back. The property was gone, they'd literally, just an hour ago, accepted an offer of the asking price on behalf of the owners. They had to do it and I hadn't gotten back to them. The tone of the guy on the phone annoyed me. It wasn't factual, it was accusatory. I hadn't called them back. I hadn't picked up their two calls (one of which was less than 12 hours after the original viewing last week).

I'm disappointed that the house has gone - I'm not going to lie. I wasn't definitely going to buy it either. I'm annoyed that the decision is out of my hands - I want this house buying thing over and done with. I find it stressful and intimidating and... well... this has brought up the same old thing.

I feel lonely. Sure, I've been talking to my sister, KfW2, FP and others about the whole thing, sharing links, asking advice etc. but when it comes to it, I am alone. I arrange appointments for viewings when I want a second opinion there with me. When trying to make decisions, it'd be nice for some encouragement and instant feedback. When something like today happens, I'm left mulling it over on my own. It could be worse, of course. It could have been a property I was really invested in, but regardless, I'm sat here with a cup of tea in a bit of a funk.

Just as I am typing this, KfW2 has called to see how I was feeling after the house was sold. I was honest with regards to the house itself, but she's no idea currently how the house-hunting thing is making me feel in general. I'll need to bring her up to speed.

I'd tried explaining all this to a friend of mine last weekend during a work night out. he did ask if I was excited about the house-hunting and I told him it was the opposite - I felt lonely, stressed etc. but I didn't have the words for it. To be fair, it was after 1AM and we were both very, very unsober. I think I got the gist of my problems across, but I lacked the words to explain it in detail.

And now, my sister has just called. Nothing's mentioned about the house, but she was asking for a favour instead. Sigh.