Just sit back, close your eyes and tell me everything... You have one hour.

I have a lot of female friends. Is there a reason for this? Perhaps. I've no idea though. However, I seem to just click easier with females than males (though don't get me wrong – my oldest friends are guys I've known for nearly 30 years now). That's hardly a big thing either. Where everything does seem to fall down is that, in a few cases (too many), I will end up feeling things for my female chums that are not at all sensible.

Not all of them, mind. Don't get me wrong, I haven't fallen for every single female that I've ever met. My friend AM is one of the closest friends that I have, and she's never short of giving me a verbal kicking (especially on the subject of female companionship). Not once did I ever regard her as anything other than a friend, though. I do have another few friends who have become friends because I was attracted to them and ended up not doing anything about it until it was too late (QC1 being a prime example, maybe QC2 though she was a co-worker more than a friend). Actually, maybe not QC1 as I did kiss her and ask her out for drinks and she turned me down.

I thought that I'd outgrown all that until recently when I went to visit my friend, E. Suffice to say, upon my return home and after nearly five years of friendship, I was having confusing thoughts about my feelings. But I don't know if it was just excitement about seeing her and being somewhere new/different or if they were genuine, non-platonic feelings.

That was an easy decision to make, though. I valued her friendship a lot and it was too important to me to throw down the toilet by trying to take our relationship to places that it probably wouldn't have gone anyway.

Saying that, last year wasn't bad – out of five attempts (yes, bite me, my social life last year sucked ass), four ended up with some sort of result. The fifth (and last) was while was out of the UK where a young lady, V, took my fancy. Even now, I've no idea how I didn't even get close to *ahem* closing the deal. She was obviously interested, and we got along brilliantly and spent time, alone in private.

Re-reading this post, I've come to the conclusion that I don't understand women. And I don't understand myself, either.