Zzzz

Another semi-remembered dream from last night, but the details are long gone. FA2 might have featured, but in what capacity, I really couldn't tell you. I don't think it was sexual.

This isn't a post about the dream itself but more that I've more dreams, or I've remembered more dreams, over the past few days than in the past six months combined.

Is it related to quality of sleep? I've slept really well since buying the new mattress, despite the back pain. But it's not been great over the past week. A change in the weather and the change in clocks maybe?

So what?

Another weird dream last night. I was rich and lived in a large house. For some reason, I was hosting two concerts, one in the front lawn and one in the back garden. Alanis Morissette and P!nk respectively. While Alanis Morissette was doing her sound check in the front, I was chatting to P!nk at the back. We were comparing stories of our respective times in New Zealand, for reasons I don't understand.

She was saying things that didn't make sense or at least what she was saying wasn't tallying with my own experiences of New Zealand and also while she was "P!nk" in the dream, physically it was actually V.

And I kinda understand why V featured. She's popped up in my Facebook feed over the weekend in fancy dress for Halloween, and that's brought back some fond memories of the night we met her at her friends' bar while she was dressed as Alice in Wonderland and looking mighty fine. I think. My memory of who she was meant to be that evening has always been awful.

And it was the realisation that it was physically V, not P!nk is when I woke this morning. 

Looking back.

I dreamt of SJ last night. I know the name might not immediately ring a bell even though she's featured on the blog before, but she was someone that I went to school with. A friend on whom I developed feelings for when I was around 17 or 18. I'd say it was my first, adult crush. I'd dated previously, had a girlfriend even, but SJ was something else.

We were close, but I never saw anything in her behaviour to indicate that making any kind of move would result in anything other than failure.

On top of that, I was still finding out who I was. I was unsure of myself, certainly immature while she appeared to have her head screwed on, know what she wanted from life.

So, yeah, the dream... we met again despite not having seen each other in 20-odd years and immediately settled into our old rhythm. Later, at a party, I tried to confess two things to her: my original crush from years ago and that I'd like to take her on a date. But I talked around the subjects without ever getting to the point, though I'm sure she knew what I was getting at and just wanted me to say it outright. The memory fades before any resolution to the dream happened.

It's been ages since I thought of SJ. She's one of the few people from school that I'd love to have a drink/coffee with now that I'm not already in contact with.

Back to front.

One comment of note from this morning's breakfast with CC was her talk of breast reduction surgery. She's complaining of back pain and was attributing this to the size of her boobs. CC (the first C stands for "chesty") has huge boobs. I couldn't even begin to tell you what size she is, but it's big.

But I'm not sure that the back pain is specifically related to her chest. She's never complained of back pain before and given my own experiences, I'd be more included to say that her issues are similar to mine: being completely sedentary. Although I spent money on a proper desk and chair setup.

CC works from her sofa or her dining room table, neither of which are going to do her any favours. 

Of course, I'm not a doctor, so I could be completely wrong. I think she's hoping that having her back pain's cause diagnosed as her chest means that she can get a boob reduction for free/cheap. I'm not sure that's how it works.

Time after time after time

In news that will shock no-one who knows CC, she didn't just want to borrow my drill. She wanted to borrow me, too. I could make a euphemism about giving CC a good drilling on two of her beds, but I don't have the energy. That's not a euphemism either.

Regardless, the favour took about a quarter of the time she thought it would, so I'm back in my house after breakfast and drilling and all within two hours of leaving.

Time after time

CC was meant to pick me up 5 minutes ago to go for brunch. Actually, that's the secondary reason, she really wants to borrow my drill, so I suggested 11 AM.

Unsurprisingly, a call came about half an hour ago. 

"Are we still on for 11?" CC asked.

"Yup, I'm starving"

"Can we do 1130 instead?" It wasn't really a question. 

So even with an extra hour in bed last night, CC still has trouble getting up. I've never met anyone like her for struggling to get out of bed. This isn't a weekend or a hangover thing. She's like this 7 days a week, often not starting work until after 10 AM.

I am starving though. 

Itchy feet.

While I can't say that it's surprising because I've not spoken to her in years so have no idea what her thought processes are, the attractive athletic blonde woman that I knew from primary school (I can't remember if I gave her a blog name) has announced that she's moving to Australia.

Not visiting, not travelling... moving. It's an interesting move at our age (she's only a few days younger than me), though I do believe that she's divorced (or separated at least) and her kids are now adults. I wonder why she made the decision?

I'm kinda jealous. I'd love to have the money and the freedom to do that. 

Little miss.

I think I dreamed of QC2 last night, but the details of the dream are gone, or were never there. Just a vague memory of QC2 and a feeling that I miss her.

It might be a dozen years since I last saw her, and it's not like we had a falling out... we just never met for drinks ever again. She butt dialled me about ten years ago - the day after I moved into my current house, actually. But that never led to anything, sadly... and that was that. 

She's not on social media any more and I'm not going to send a text or call a 12 year old number that might not even be hers anymore.

Onwards.

The house stuff continues at pace. The first of two steps is pencilled in for the first week in November. I'm waiting to hear back about the second stage, but I'm hoping it'll be the week after. There are a few queries on the scope of the work in the second stage that may add a little more time and expense, but it's this piece of work that has driven the entire project.

Hopefully it'll all be nailed down by the end of the afternoon. 

Time out

Despite being really busy, I'm also in a bit of a motivational slump at work. Nothing bad has happened, I'm just completely de-motivated. I do have a lot of time off still to take. I think it's like 9 days still to take, and that doesn't count the time I already have booked off at Xmas.

I could, in theory, work a 4-day week between now and the end of the year, but while I'll probably end up doing something like that, I don't want to book the time now. I'd rather react as we get into party season and take time off accordingly.

I'm half expecting either The Crowd or KfW2 to suggest a trip to the Christmas market, which will likely be a Sunday, which means a Monday off is required.

Still, taking Friday off is tempting. 

Night out.

It was a great night out. I was a little apprehensive when I first arrived at the bar and it was packed. While I've been out in bars over the past year or so, I've never been out when it's been really busy so the brief flicker of anxiety/discomfort was something new to me.

FC and Mrs FC were the first to arrive. Mrs FC was quick to ask if I'd lost weight. GM was the next to arrive. S was an hour late. He'd gone out drinking with other friends and took his time joining us.

We went to two bars - arguably my two favourite bars in the city centre. And it was great people watching. And I'm not gonna lie, it was great seeing cute women. There seemed to be a lot of women in skirts and boots too which was a bonus. 

There was one woman sitting at the table next to me in the second bar who was giving off serious Anna Kendrick vibes, but they weren't giving off "open to talking" vibes.

We called it quits around midnight, which was just right for me in terms of time and drunkenness.

What?

I think I've posted before about an evening where I ended up washing FBS's hair after we'd been painting her front room. She was only in her bra and jeans, and somehow her pressing into me as I washed her hair felt more intimate than when we actually had sex.

Well, I had a dream last night, and I can barely remember any of the details, but that was the feeling I woke to this morning - something inexplicably intimate that wasn't your normal intimate interaction.

Let's go!

The plans for the house move on. The sales guy has been out with engineering drawings that are, thankfully, showing my original request rather than the suggestions offered up by the engineer when he came out.

Once the paperwork is processed, I'll get a firm date on when the work can be done, but the sales guy reckons around 4 weeks from today. Result!

Watching.

I am looking forward to Saturday night. If I am being honest, I'd say that I am as excited about being in the city on a Saturday night as I am about seeing The Crowd in... years? I can't even remember the last night I saw them. Was it the Chloe night? I'm struggling to recall if I've seen them since.

It looks like GM is going to drive, and might leave early, but I've already suggested meeting earlier than we used to and leaving town before it becomes impossible to get a taxi. 

But sitting in a bar, on a Saturday night people watching and having fun is something I've missed as much as the company itself. Is it the potential of meeting new people? Maybe. I've always had great success in chatting to new people with GM. It's definitely at the back of my mind.

Bell curve.

Back when this blog was in its infancy, I had a rather large crush on Catherine Bell. In particular, she'd done a photoshoot for, I think, FHM, and it contained one of my favourite photos of a celebrity. She was wearing a tiny pair of white shorts and a grey bra, and it was taken on a ship. Here's an old blog post with those pictures.

Well, a few days ago, she posted on her Instagram about it and shared some photos not seen before (at least by me). Sadly, none of her in the cute shorts/bra outfit, but nice pictures nonetheless.

Talkabout...

KfW2 called. She was out walking her dog. We got into the small talk, but she quickly asked the question

"Was there any reason you wanted to go out in November?"

"Well, yeah, I've not seen you in ages and I know you're super-busy in October, so I thought maybe try and nail something down for November."

"Mmmm." She thought out loud about her plans for November. I think she had assumed that there was something I specifically wanted to chat about, that there was something wrong and part of the reason for calling was checking in on me.

"We could maybe do the last weekend in November. I'd have to wait and see though about this other thing [that she had explained to me]."

The conversation continued. We chatted for about 45 minutes. As usual, it was great hearing from her, but I'd still love to see her in person.

YES!

There was one hiccup in my productive long weekend. I had meant to schedule a follow-up hone call about some work I wanted done to my house. I had a guy out a few weeks ago to chat about it and he needed some expertise advice.

For some reason, I dropped off his radar. I had assumed the worst. That might have been an influence on my funk from yesterday. I did make the call today, though, and everything seems good. He's coming back at the end of the week and I should be able to get the paperwork signed, nail down a date and get the work done, hopefully before the end of November.

That means that the other plans I have for the house can start early next year, if I can maintain this motivation. 

Whoops.

I took yesterday off work to recharge, and I have to say I had a pretty good, productive, relaxing weekend that seemed to be doing the job just nicely. I even got some new clothes shopping done. But it all just disappeared mid-evening. And I don't know what, if anything, brought it on, but the funk hit quickly and it hit hard.

And that's carried into today. Hmmm... it's going to be a long day.

Boo!

I sent KfW2 a message inquiring about her availability next month. if she was free on the dates I suggested, would she like to do something? Grab dinner and drinks maybe?

Sadly, she's busy next month. it's her eldest daughter's school exams which I'd completely forgotten about. 

That probably means it'll be the Christmas party period before we see each other, at least in an adult social setting. 

Well, what do we have here?

One of the blockers in getting The Crowd out for drinks has been GM. Rather, this unspoken rule that it's everyone or no-one. It's similar with FBS, D etc.

But GM has been the most difficult to pin down. We can never agree dates, but GM has never been that upfront about suggesting alternatives or sharing his availability.

I was genuinely surprised at how easy it all came together on Monday evening.

I was also extremely surprised when GM started posting in the WhatsApp group earlier today suggesting places to meet. This is unusual and, as a result, I am suspicious.

Surprise, surprise.

Randomly, earlier today I discovered that FP had an Instagram account. FP, like me, was not a big social media kind of person. It was not under his real name, which is why I don't think it registered sooner, even if it was listed under the "suggested for you" section.

There are a few familiar names in there - Attractive Neighbour, FBS and S are the top 4 (along with FP). All of their accounts are locked down, though.

I don't appear in any of FP's Instagram posts, though there are at least a couple of pictures where I'm sure I'm floating around behind the camera somewhere.

I miss FP. It's his birthday soon.

First time.

I saw this picture of Emma Bunton on Instagram earlier. I'm digging it for a number of reasons - she's an attractive woman, she's in a trouser suit and that mesh top/bra combo is also a winner.

It's the mesh top/bra combo that's prompted this post, though. This was the type of top that FA2 wore the first night we slept together - a green sheer top with green Wonderbra. It wasn't the type of thing that FA2 usually wore.

Nail on the head.

One of the topics covered by Nerdy Girl and myself last night as we did a slightly-longer than usual walk was what we're currently watching on television. I mentioned Supergirl. I know that Nerdy Girl has watched those DC TV programmes in the past.

"It's rubbish but attractive women in short skirts and boots keeps me interested."

"I thought you'd be more into the sister character?"

I was surprised. She hit the nail on the head, though I don't ever recall having a chat with NG about my taste in women.

Absolutely super.

 

I've started another run through of Supergirl. It'll take a while - 6 seasons, 126 episodes of roughly 45 mins per episode. But I'm bored and there's nothing new tickling my fancy. And, y'know, attractive women in short skirts and boots.

I should point out, if you haven't already guessed by my posts and comments on women that Chyler Leigh is much more my physical preference than Melissa Benoist, but it's hard to beat that skirt/boots combo.

Awww...

Sadly, the magic seems to have worn off. Quiet Girl has already shared that she won't be attending our work's Halloween party at the end of the month.

Only a minor setback given my recent successes in getting people to agree to meet.

And I've reached out to KfW2, so let's see where things go from there. 

As if by magic...

Out of the blue, a WhatsApp message from FBS giving a list of dates she's free in November. A quick reply from D, a suggestion by me and I think we could have nailed down a date, unless Friction Guy throws a spanner in the works!

So, with The Crowd and now this lot arranged, I should definitely work on KfW2. 

Penned in.

Quite surprisingly, it's all come together with The Crowd. We're agreed to go out in 12 days time, on the Saturday. I'm already looking forward to it.

If this is all coming together, I should try and get KfW2 out, too. Not on the same night, obviously, but maybe the start of next month. I know she's busy this month with family stuff and Halloween.

And there's a night out with D, FBS etc. that'll probably happen in November. 

Pencilled in.

After sending out a message to The Crowd a few days ago to somewhat generally positive responses, we might have even arranged a date: 18th October. It's the only date this month that FC is available. I'm free and I think S is, too.

If nothing else, I think we should meet even if the others can't make it. 

Urgh.

I think it's fair to say that I'm not feeling 100% today. I'm not hungover, at least not in the traditional sense. I don't really get hungover. But I am definitely still tired, despite being in bed from around 10PM and not waking until after 9AM. I will probably be mentally muggy all day, and it's not a feeling I like.

Bit it was fun, even if the numbers were low because of Storm Amy. 

Quiet Girl's just texted to find out how it was. I'll reply once I get some coffee.

Weather or not.

Storm Amy might be troublesome tomorrow. Quiet Girl has already said that she's re-evaluating her attendance at our work thing tomorrow. I'm still keen to go out, but I do see this weather keeping a lot of people away. I wouldn't be surprised if it was cancelled, but I'd hate if it was cancelled at the last minute.

Party time?

After D's attempt to get us out soon, I took the plunge and sent a message into the WhatsApp group with The Crowd about meeting for drinks soon.

S was quick to reply in the affirmative and so, surprisingly, was GM. Nothing as yet from FC or Mrs FC, but maybe this time we'll get something sorted. I'd be surprised if we saw each other this month, but maybe the start of November? That feels doable.

GM's already suggested a Christmas night as well. Hopefully we can do both.

It's been a while.

It was QC2's birthday yesterday. She's an older woman by about 10 months. It's nearly ten years since we had any kind of contact, and even that was a mis-dial. I miss our semi-frequent meetups at a pub for a few drinks and a chat.

Actually, now that I think about it, I really do like meetups for a few drinks and a chat. 

Sigh.

I went to visit my sister last night. I've not seen her in about a month, but that's not a surprise. I've posted before about the one-sided nature of our relationship. I do get an annual invite for Christmas dinner and the odd BBQ. They've asked me to do them favours like babysit or house-sit. But as I think I've blogged before, they never show up at my house, they never make a phone call just to be in touch.

And as I left their house last night after an enjoyable couple of hours conversation, my brother-in-law said "don't be a stranger".

I never am - I'm the one who always makes the effort, and it always frustrates me when they say something like that, or when their solution to my loneliness is to go and visit them. There's more to it than that. It frustrates me that they don't get that. It's not like they never visit other people. They do.

Raincheck?

D sent a message into our WhatsApp group yesterday (Me, D, FBS and Friction Guy) saying that he's free for the next three weekends. Apart from this coming Friday (work event with Quiet Girl et al.) I'm also free.

FBS was vague in her response.

"Yes" but also "Husband's away for three weeks this month".

I don't know if that means she's free or not. She hasn't suggested a date, so maybe not? It could be November before we meet up, despite conversations starting in August.

Out of the blue, again.

I had a dream last night where I was working, but I can't really explain what the work was. I feel it was like some data analysis for health insurance or something? My boss was someone that actually used to be my boss a few years back. We didn't really see eye-to-eye as she was extremely pedantic about stuff that just made life harder for no real benefit.

I also got paired up with an attractive short brunette woman. I'm convinced this was either Quiet Girl or R. I'm leaning heavily towards it being R. She was being very clingy and I mean that literally - being tactile to the point of not letting go, and the dream was mostly about me trying to get my own space.

It's interesting in that I've not thought about R in... a decade? The last time I do recall thinking about R was when FP and I were in London in September 2014 and took a day trip to Brighton which is where R was living at the time. CAB, too, but that's not relevant to this post. I go and try and find her, but she's never had any social media presence. I doubt that's changed now.

What's in a name?

Years ago, when I worked alongside Friction Guy, FBS, D etc. I mentored a guy who was about six years younger than I was. It became a running joke that he was Ruuude Jnr or Ruuude 2. They claimed that we were effectively lookalikes, but I thought they were taking the piss. Their opinion was based mainly due to the fact we had similar hairstyles more than anything else. Our build and height was completely different, for starters.

However, years after I left, I was due to meet someone in a bar. As an aside, it was the pub that I first met R2. Regardless, I stood at the bar and ordered a pint. A group of people walked in and stood beside me at the bar. I recognised some of them as being ex-colleagues,but having no interest in talking to them, I ignored them.

Literally seconds later though, they kept saying a name over and over again. It took me a while to realise that they were trying to get my attention, but they weren't using my name. They were using Ruuude Jnr's name. I continued to ignore them.

It was around that time that my companion (probably G or M) turned up and we moved on. 

Out of the blue. Well, green.

In a meeting earlier, while bored, I randomly thought of the night I first slept with FA2. I can't remember if I blogged about it before, but I'd be surprised if I hadn't.

I was out with school friends. BW invited out FA2. FA2 turned up wearing her "I'm going to get it" outfit. All that really meant was jeans,  a see-through green blouse and a green Wonderbra. We'd had a previous conversation where she explained that's what she would wear to make an impression on a guy.

We'd already spent many hours on her sofa making out at this stage, but I still didn't grasp that the person she wanted top make an impression on was me. At least not until that night until  she dragged me upstairs back at her place.

Anyway, I genuinely don't know why that random thought popped into my head at 230 PM  this afternoon... but it did.

Fantastic.

Over the past week or so, I have been binging super hero films. Last night, it was the most recent Fantastic Four film, and tonight it was the 2015 version.

Both were OK. The latter more memorable for starring the lovely Kate Mara than anything else, and especially as Quiet Girl was on my mind from our earlier interaction. I've pointed out that I do get a QG vibe off Kate Mara, haven't I?

Confirmation.

Quiet Girl messaged earlier to say that she's put her name forward for next week's work social event. Stalky Guy is going, too, so that's the basis for a good evening. At least until about 9 PM when Quiet Girl will trundle off home.

Stalky Guy and I may call it quits around that same time, but we often stay out later if the vibe is good. 

But it's a week away, too early to be making actual plans. 

Hello again.

For the first time in ages - months at least - my sister's university friend has popped up on Facebook, still looking very well.

She's been absent from social media and the online dating apps for ages. She'd regularly pop up in my "People You Know" feed on Facebook (which is where she appeared earlier) or in my online dating feeds. I always swipe right, but we've never matched. I genuinely don't know what I'd do if we did.

YES!

A tradesman has just left the house after doing a piece of work that I have been contemplating for a few months now. He's done a great job, but after a few hours of hammers, sawing and various power tools, I have a splitting headache.

But I'm chuffed to bits that I've gotten some work done.

Roll on the next piece at the start of November... hopefully. 

Just a vibe thing.

I had a bit of a lie-in this morning. Actually, I'm still doing it, writing this up from my toasty warm bed. But the point of the post is that I was watching Match of the day on my tablet. It's presented by Kelly Cates. 

I can't remember if I've posted about this before, but I get real QC1 vibes from her - it's the short blonde haircut and vague if-I-squint-there's a resemblance thing going on. Plus she was wearing some kind of trouser suit thing and I know for a fact that I've posted my appreciation of women in trouser suits before.

Part of me is tempted to reach out, to see if I can everyone out for drinks or something, but part of my refuses to do so because it's nearly always me. Cutting off my nose to spite my face? Maybe.

Cheers!

We've got a work thing coming up in 2 weeks, so I sent out the feelers to Stalky Guy and Quiet Girl. Quiet Girl, at first, was reluctant to commit. However, as the conversation went on, she changed her mind. She hasn't confirmed 1005 that she will go, but I think she will. She always seems to have fun when out with us, so my gut feeling will be that she come out.

Anti-procrastination.

So the guy who was meant to call yesterday has just left my house. He's quoted the job and said he can do it on Monday. That's an absolute result. It's only a half day job, too, so all that work will be complete and I can move on to do other stuff.

The guy from yesterday called, too, and the work I want him to do can be done around the start of November. 

I've been adulting like a motherfucker over the past few days and reaping the rewards for it, too.

Go on!

I have been adulting like a motherfucker today. A guy has come out to price up some work, and based on his initial quote (that he will refine and email to me), I've already told him I'd like him to do it. Even if the price rises by 10%, it's still affordable and in my price range.

I've also arranged for another guy to come out and look at some work, so I'#m expecting him to call within the next day or so.

It's all kicking off, and I'm feeling really proud of myself. 

Remember this?

Despite knowing CC for roughly 13 years, it only dawned on me this afternoon that CC's birthday matches an anniversary of my own - the day I went to America for nearly three months just over 20 years ago. That was the visit where I met V and generally had a blast. Good times.

HB, CC.

It's CC's birthday today. I wished her HB on her Facebook page, but I wasn't in direct contact. I had toyed with the idea of messaging her and maybe doing dinner, but ultimately I'm really low energy today. I might change my mind later, but that's unlikely.

Tune in.

I've just bought tickets to another gig, in December. That's two gigs in a matter of a few weeks at the end of November/start of December. I've said before that I wanted to go to more gigs, and I am. I've been to more gigs in the past 12 months than I have in the past 10 years.

The flip side is that I'm going on my own. I can do gigs on my own, but I prefer doing stuff with other people, sharing the experience, making it something more than just a gig.

 Beggars can't be choosers though, so solo gigging it is.

Out out.

Seeing KfW2 last weekend has really reignited the itch to be social, to see friends, to be out and about people watching. I miss the nights out I had with KfW2. I miss the nights out I had with The Crowd.

And, of course, I miss the nights out with FP.

My social life fell apart after Covid and it just hasn't restarted, nor have I met anyone new, partly as a result of having no social life.

I should call Nerdy Girl. 

*Pats back*

It's the last proper day of my time off work. back on Monday, but we're now into the weekend (ish). I'm quite pleased as I've not just spent the whole week sitting on the sofa watching TV. I've done that before then had massive regret that I wasn't more productive when I went back to work.

This week I've managed to see KfW2, arrange a couple of quotes for house stuff, get some gardening done including giving the hedge a good trim (a fairly big job, too). I also reached out to FP's widow. I've not message her in a while, so I thought I'd reach out. I should fire her another message and offer to meet for coffee or drinks or something.

So, I don't see there being any regret when I log on when Monday rolls round and I do (currently at least) feel quite recharged. 

Let's go?

I was chatting to USHW yesterday. Well, not chatting per se. Messaging. We revisited the idea of meeting up as that original plan (which would have been last week or this week) kinda fell by the wayside when life distracted me over the summer.

So potentially we have a vague idea of where we could meet. I have a vague idea of when that might be (any time from mid-October to mid-November), so all we'd need to do is finalise the details and I can book hotels and flights.

Can we actually do it this time, is the real question. 

Quotations.

More adulting today, this time to arrange for someone to come out and quote me some work. This is something I've been meaning to do for a while, so I'd delighted that I've actually gotten round to it. I really should get more quotes, but this has always been where any enthusiasm and motivation drops away: I get one quote, but can't compare it to others.

However, I do know the ballpark figure for this work and if this guy, who has been highly recommended, comes close to the figure I have, then I'll just go with him. I'll only get a second or third opinion if his quote is massively over the number I have in my head. 

They can't come out until next week, but this is work I've wanted done since before Covid, so waiting a week won't hurt*

*Unless things break in the interim, which they could well do. 

Booo!

I've already awake for hours. I woke at around 5 AM and couldn't get back to sleep. I've got a headache that won't shift and a craving for a proper Latte from somewhere. I decided that I'd treat myself to a fry-up brekkie from the cafe round the corner and trundled round in the pouring rain, only to find that it wasn't open, despite Google telling me that it was.

Seeing things.

One thing that I meant to add when writing yesterday's post, was that I was a little disappointed in a couple of things that KfW2 said (or didn't say).

For starters, I've lost a bit of weight this year. Enough that a few people have outright asked me about it. But KfW2 hasn't, in two meetings. It was only when I hadn't completely finished a portion of her (delicious) dinner on Saturday night that it came up in conversation as I admitted that I was on a diet and shared the amount of weight I've lost.

We were also discussing scars and I was showing off some of the many scars I have, due to some surgery about twenty years back. Scars that were due to a body issue that I have. Not a body issue - that implies a mental aspect (which is there, but it's not huge), but a medical condition. I don't even know what it's called, if it was even diagnosed. It's gotten much worse since I originally spoke my GP about it, but there's no cure per se. However, it's neither painful nor life threatening. I'd shared this medical condition with her and been very open and upfront about it, but she'd completely forgotten that it existed.

Oh, and she temporarily forgot that I had a tattoo even though she's actually seen it with her own eyes on multiple occasions.

But... getting back to the point of this post... I know that I am guilty of putting my friends on pedestals. They're not going to see or remember every little thing about me, but KfW2 knows about my body issues. Well, that one at least. So for her to seemingly forget is more than a little disappointing. Not seeing the weight loss, I can overlook - we've only seen each other three times this year, and all three times she's been less than sober. But still.

Good for the soul.

I surprised KfW2 by not only staying the night, but not getting a bus early in the morning. But I'm getting ahead of myself. I arrived at KfW2's just after 6 PM. She had a surprise. She'd bought a dog.

I love dogs, and even if I hadn't, this one was gorgeous. An 8-week old cockapoo. And you know? Dogs love me. So it took little time for the doggo to decide I was awesome and want lots of pets and cuddles from me, much to KFW2's kids' chagrin.

It was nice seeing KfW2 again. It was great to chat, to have a proper conversation with someone who wasn't family. Mr KfW2 came home from work and the conversation and beer flowed until well after 1 AM.

I could have gone home, but the return to home instinct wasn't there. I think there were two main reasons: firstly I had zero thing to do today and secondly, with the upcoming week being a week off work, Sunday's time wasn't a precious resource.

So I stayed over. It's something I only do maybe 1 in 10 times, and mostly due to the above. But also due to not sleeping well in a strange bed. And I didn't sleep well. My fitness watch told me that was the worst night's sleep I've had since I started tracking my sleep a couple of months back.

However, KfW2 made up for that by cooking yummy pancakes for breakfast with plenty of hot coffee. I chilled with her kids for a few hours, watching a film, then it was time to come home while they went shopping. And I'm just back in the house, nearly 24 hours after leaving last evening.

And just like that...

I was going to call KfW2 at lunchtime to have a conversation about meeting up soon. It was no surprise then when she called me. This happens a lot.

We had a forty-minute phone call, mostly about our work lives when I changed the subject because KfW2 mentioned that work was getting her down.

"When are we gonna meet, then? Let's do something."

"My time management is awful these days. I don't know when I'm free. What are you free?" 

"Any time."

KfW2 laughed.

"You always say that then when I suggest something you say you can't make it"

"That's cos your suggestion is always 'what are you doing in ten minutes?'"

She laughed again.

"That's true. What are you doing tomorrow?" 

"I've nothing on."

"Come down and visit"

"OK"

"I'll need to confirm with Mr KfW2 to make sure we're not doing anything, but let's do that."

"OK"

There you go. I should be seeing KfW2 tomorrow, unless there's some social thing they've forgotten about. 

Just stuff.

FA2 featured in a dream last night. I don't recall exact details, but I was travelling. I was in New Zealand, I think, and generally pottering about. FA2 was with me but I don't really recall why.

And maybe K featured too. I don't remember any details of the dreamt hat featured K, but for some reason she was on my mind when the alarm went off this morning.

meh. Woohoo!

I have been adulting today, like a boss. So I'm simultaneously very pleased with myself and emotionally drained. I hate adulting. 

Same old...

CC called me in work today. I've not spoken to her in ages. Months maybe? And yet the conversation just followed the same old topics, all driven by CC: have I done any work to my house? Have I gone on holiday?

I don't know how many times I have to answer these questions before she realises that the answers are not likely to change a great deal.

Oh?

I was at a conference today with some amazing keynote speakers. Famous ones, too. Famous to the point where I'd leak the name of my employer if I shared who it was.

Suffice to say, they were both excellent for differing reasons. 

I was cynical about it all, but I've been proved wrong. 

Grrrr.

For the first time ever, I've done something I thought I would never do. I've actually emailed my MP.

I've asked him to address the UK Online Safety Act. This was brought on by the fact that I've recently been asked for a third time to verify my age/identity with a third verification platform in order to play games.

The thing is, I play games on like 6 different platforms. I listen to music on two platforms. I am an active member of a number of social media sites. I regularly watch videos on YouTube. I am infrequently active on three different online dating applications.

And, yes, I've watched porn. My Jenni Lee and Mindy Main appreciation didn't appear out of thin air. But I do agree that it should be tightened up. However, that's what the age restriction on my ISP should do, right? 

This shit mounts up. Do I want my face or official documents to be potentially hacked? Errr... no.

So, yeah, I emailed my MP. I've distilled it into the below bullet points in case any passers by are interested in emailing their own MPs or want to add to the list about why this implementation is bad for the individual.

• Excessive Data Sharing: The Act pushes ordinary people to hand over sensitive documents or biometric data just to access everyday online services. 
• Conflicts with UK GDPR: Data protection law requires data minimisation, yet this Act forces citizens to share far more personal information than necessary. 
• Multiple Verifications: With no single trusted provider, people would need to repeat the process across platforms like Spotify, Netflix, Steam, and Reddit. 
• Increased Breach Risks: Each extra disclosure raises the chances of leaks, identity theft, or surveillance. 
• History Repeats: Equifax (147m people affected), TalkTalk (150k UK customers), and even the NHS have all suffered major breaches — why expect smaller platforms to fare better? 
• Fraud Opportunities: Scammers will exploit the situation by creating fake verification sites, tricking users into uploading passports and IDs. 
• Vulnerable Groups Targeted: The elderly and less tech-savvy will be the easiest victims of such impersonation scams. 
• Disproportionate Measures: Millions of adults’ privacy will be undermined, while safer and simpler ISP-level parental controls already exist, or should. 
• Chilling Effect: Mandatory ID checks risk discouraging free speech and lawful online activity, conflicting with rights under the European Convention on Human Rights. 
• Unbalanced Approach: The stated aim of child protection is important, but it should not come at the expense of the privacy, security, and freedoms of the entire population.

 And I might be wrong on some of these, but I am just a nerd, I am not a lawyer, so there's a lot of my own interpretation in there. But it's a GREAT email.

And why not have a picture of the aforementioned Jenni Lee while I'm at it, yeah?

Phew.

I always take some time off around this time of year. I never have anything planned, but it just seems like a decent time to take some time for myself. The kids are back at school, so it's quieter during the day. The weather's usually decent and all-in-all well worth taking a week off work.

But I've been side-tracked this summer. Work's been super busy. Family stuff has occupied my time outside of work and I just haven't gotten around to asking my boss for a week off. I'll do that this afternoon though. Not next week - I have work commitments that I can't avoid. But the week after, for sure.

And I've also fired KfW2 a quick message demanding that we do "something" soon. Hopefully that'll kick off a conversation or, even better, actual arrangements.

Figure it out.

I'm pretty sure I've blogged about this before, but having recently come across the below pictures, I thought it was worth sharing again. 

Elizabeth Hurley did a spread in UK lad's magazine Loaded in, I think, 1995.

I was always taken with the specific image in the bottom right of the collage image. I always got a CAB vibe off that picture - the hair, the vague shape of her face and, let's not beat about the bush here, her figure. I'm not suggesting for one second that CAB was as attractive as Elizabeth Hurley.

CAB was not, though, a lingerie woman. She was a jeans and t-shirt woman. Yes, the jeans and t-shirts hid a killer figure, but it was not something she was interested in showing off. A bit like CC in that regard.

And another reason for posting is that I always remember that single image from that shoot, the one of Hurley lying on the bed. I don't remember the others. I don't know of they were part of that shoot or unused shots that have now made their way onto the internet.

I'm...

I can't remember the dream from last night, but I am convinced it involved me having sex with FBS. Or maybe I didn't have a dream at all and I just woke this morning, horny as hell, with FBS on my mind for some reason?

Regardless, I woke this morning, horny as hell, with FBS on my mind.

Birthday Season

My Facebook feed is full of upcoming birthdays. I blogged about MMBF (and MM) having recent birthdays. It's my sister's birthday today and it's CH's birthday tomorrow.

I'm always reminded of the evening CH sat on my knee at a work event, was surreptitiously tactile before leaving for her bus home and sending a series of sweet text messages telling me how awesome she thought I was.

And for a brief moment, when I remember that evening, I miss CH. Until I remember how our friendship ended, how she played the victim when I called her out on her flakiness and her general inability to take any kind of criticism.

Great rack, though. 

Also... MMBF posted pics of her birthday weekend, and there's now actual evidence that M's assertion that MMBF is really high maintenance is true.

Time flies.

It was MMBF's birthday yesterday. I have memories of a night when MM invited me out for drinks with her and MMBF and it being a really good night, but that must easily be over ten years ago. I sometimes wonder if MM had ulterior motives, but I never saw any evidence that MMBF was romantically interested in me. I do semi-recall her being quite tactile that night, though. I also recall MM chatting about some guy that was showing interest in MMBF - an ex of some description - and her disapproving of it. But they both asked my advice, which I gave (and MM approved of). 

I had already made some effort at trying to bed MMBF at M and MM's wedding, but again, saw nothing to indicate she was interested in anything, and she left the wedding at the end of the evening despite my invitation to the resident's bar to carry on celebrating.

So, Happy Birthday MMBF. 

 

Wait, what?

I can't remember the entirety of the dream I had last night, but I do remember isolated portions of it.

So, in one portion, I was having dinner and drinks with UK TV celebrity Jeremy Clarkson at the restaurant of some celebrity chef. Gordon Ramsey maybe?

In another portion, an attractive woman, wearing pyjamas, was sitting on my lap. I can't remember who it was but she was known to me and we were super comfortable with each other, hence the lap-sitting. My sister's university friend, maybe? I got that vibe that it was her or someone like her. Anyway, people were making a big deal of her sitting on my lap and giving me hugs and cuddling. We both informed crowd that we were just friends, which was true within the dream.

There was another portion where I was in an action film with aliens in it. Or maybe it was "real" and I was battling aliens. It was hard to tell.

Anyway, I woke this morning, remembering those three isolated incidents but not really having a grasp on the overall dream. Very weird. I've not seen SUF on Facebook or online dating in ages. 

Sigh.

It's been two years since FP passed away. I can't remember the exact date, but it was today or yesterday. It was definitely this date that Mrs FP called to give me the news. It wasn't unexpected. He'd been ill for some time, but it was still difficult news to take.

I'd lost people close to me before, but FP was different. We'd see each other frequently, we'd message nearly daily and, with KfW2 and USHW, he was one of few people who really knew me. He was my sounding board, offering advice when needed. And the gap he left hasn't yet been filled.

And it might go without saying after the last paragraph, but I still miss him.

Facebook memories around this time are difficult as we'd been to a few gigs and taken more than a few pictures.

I really should get in touch with Mrs FP. I feel kin da guilty that I've not been in touch even though I always got the feeling that she didn't like me but was glad that I occupied FP so she could spend time with her family. She was extremely close to her family to a point that felt wrong to me.

Fly me to...

After last night's intense burst of... I don't know what it was, I woke this morning feeling very lonely. And the wanderlust was back, too. Couple those with the fact that a few days ago I'd seen an all-inclusive holiday in a travel agent's window for Lanzarote in the first week of September for what seemed a reasonable amount of money.

"I should see if CC fancies this," I thought to myself.

That was swiftly followed by:

"Are you fucking mad?" 

For starters, it really wouldn't be my kind of holiday. Second of all, do I really want to spend a week in CC's company? I've had experience of that, and it wasn't my thing, even if I did get to rub suntan lotion into her skin and see her in a selection of bikinis.

And I think Sports Girl lives in Lanzarote these days. Do  I really want to bump into her (even though it's really unlikely)? 

So, yeah, I put that idea to bed sharpish. 

Oooof.

For some reason, I just had this massive wave of missing KfW2. Like REALLY missing her. Or us. Or what we were ten years ago. Actually, I think that's it rather than just KfW2, though I would like to see her again, soon. 

But I miss the closeness, the being in the pub chatting, neither of us feeling awkward and able to just talk. The suddenness of this feeling has completely surprised me in its intensity. I wasn't even thinking of KfW2. I was thinking of a conversation I had a few weeks back with Quiet Girl about work. Why my brain made that jump is beyond me.

Let's do it.

I promised Nerdy Girl when we next did a walk that we'd try our old, longer route. It's been ages since we did it, so I'm looking forward to it. I'll be honest though, I liked doing the shorter route and sitting in CB Pub for an hour afterwards with a soft drink or non-alcoholic beer and chatting.

But I also want to see how well my foot has healed. It's two months since I got a clean bill of health and it's been pain-free for longer than that. So, yeah, let's do it.

Go me!

The glorious weather continues. I've done more gardening, I've arranged for the council to collect some big items for recycling, I've chatted with Nerdy Girl (we're meeting tomorrow) and I'll try and give KfW2 a call once I post this, and that's all on top of doing a full day's work.

A full day's work with me staring out of the window at my back garden, wishing I was there. But a full day's work nonetheless.

Sigh.

Thanks to the continued good weather and my work on Friday afternoon, today has been a really chilled day. I walked to the nearest shopping centre and bought a coffee (it's just over a mile away) and walked back, drinking it.

I did a few more bits and pieces in the garden before sitting down for a few hours to read a book and listen to music and it's done wonders.

Back to work tomorrow, sadly, but I should be meeting Nerdy Girl this week.

Let's go?

The group chat with D, FBS and Friction Guy has been busy today. I sent a message suggesting we meet for drinks soon. FBS was first to reply. She's busy. It could be late October or even November by the time we get something arranged. But at least the suggestion is out there and the conversation trundles on.

I should contact KfW2 and arrange something with her.

YES!

It's amazing how a spell of good weather just increases the mood. I feel like I've been sleeping better, I've got more energy and despite being super busy at work and some family stuff going on, I'm in great form.

I took this afternoon off from work and have spent an hour doing some work in the back garden. I think I'm a little sunburned, but only a little.

Urgh.

My back has been giving me grief for the past few months, sporadically. I really need to get back into my yoga. But last night was a particularly bad night. I feel asleep quite quickly, but I woken less than an hour later, then spent nearly two hours trying to get back to sleep.

Additionally, I had to start early this morning,  so that meant waking an hour earlier and boy am I feeling it this morning.

Lots of coffee, I think. 

...will be friends.

I was trying to get Nerdy Girl out for a walk this week, but she's busy with a couple of funerals. Friends, I think, but I didn't press the matter when she replied. I probably should have, but I'll reach out at the end of the week to see if she wants to meet for a drink or something. Maybe some company will help.

Sigh.

I was meant to do some family stuff today. I have a deadline of this time next week to fill in a form, but I don't have the information nor can I get the people with the information to assist.

But I'm also snowed under with work, to the point where the phone calls I wanted to make today, I simply couldn't. I was also expecting a message from my sister with some kind of update relating to the same thing, but I heard nothing. 

I'll have to find some time tomorrow, but I'm not optimistic and it's stressing me out.

Oh?

One thing that I meant to call out in last week's work event with Stalky Guy and Quiet Girl was Quiet Girl being quite tactile. For the record, I'm not suggesting anything untoward, just calling it out because in the years that I've known her, she's never been overly tactile with anyone that I've seen.

And yet, last week, she was sitting closer at times. On more than one occasion, she was resting her head on my shoulder. It was this action that made me realise that something was different.

Sure, we've hugged before. She's a hugger. But this? This was different. 

Out of the blue

Out of the blue, Quiet Girl messaged me last night. She was in a pub and spotted a co-worker. Not just any co-worker, but a guy that we used to work beside, pre-Covid. He was an awful bore. One of those people who used to read Wikipedia and the proclaim himself to be an expert on the subject.

He would corner people and then talk at them for ages. Like a proper long time. Up to an hour, and this would be during the work day.

I've been properly rude to him, too, berating him for having zero social skills - interrupting conversations so he could pontificate on whatever topic he wanted to talk about. People have been shocked, but you need to be blunt to people like that. Tact doesn't work. I tried that.  

Jobsworth

So, not only did work piss me off over the past few days but I had to deal with a jobsworth yesterday. And public transport let me down.

So, the story is that I called up some people on Thursday and asked for help to fill in a form. I can fill in forms, fine, but I have a specific form that needs done by next week and I simply don't have the information. The people I called have the information. And there are a lot of questions that need answered.

I explained everything, the girl on the phone said she'd book some time in the relevant person's calendar and all was good.

I took a half day off work, jumped on a bus, which was late, then a train. Then I got off the train because it was delayed indefinitely due to another broken down train on the tracks. I walked to the bus stop and got the bus instead. 

I was an hour late. I despise being late. I should have been 15 minutes early, if my first bus had been on time. 15 minutes late if the train had left on time.

But I knocked on the woman's door and introduced myself.

The first thing she said was...

"I don't fill in forms"

"I'm not asking you to fill in the form. I'm asking you for the information I need to fill in the form"

"I don't do that"

"How am I meant to fill in this form then?"

"I can escalate it if you want?"

"Yes please"

"I'll call you on Monday"

"Thank you"

Now that's the gist of the conversation, but imagine the beginning of the conversation going round in circles when she tells me she doesn't fill in forms and me explaining that this feels like an impossible task if she won't fill in the form nor will she give me the information I need to fill in the form, which needs to be completed, posted and delivered within 7 days.

I am fucking livid. Time and money wasted, and a jobsworth.

HB, AK.

Apparently it's Anna Kendrick's 40th birthday today. Any excuse to post a picture or two, eh?

 

Gah!

Work's pissing me off. I'm working on a high-visibility project and they've arbitrarily decided we're going to release it next week. We're not finished. It's OK, they explained, we'll release what we've got "dark" (i.e. turned off) then when the rest is done, we'll release that and turn it on.

I said I wasn't happy.

My co-worker said he wasn't happy.

Still, they persisted.

So now, not only do we have to finish the work and hope that it's up to scratch, but we have extra chores to do to prepare for next week, as well.

And all to save a week.

For a fancy new user interface that's (IMO) awful to look at. But we're not doing that bit. Nothing legal. Nothing that's going to cost the company a lot of money. Nothing compliance related. Just an arbitrary date so someone can look good.

Maybe I'll do EuroMillions tonight. 

Wait, what?

I had a dream last night that involved FP and Jessica Alba. We were at his holiday home in America and after a hard day's work painting his apartment. After showering and changing, we hit his local blues bar.

After propping up the bar for an hour or so,  this stunning brunette stood beside us and ordered drinks. FP chatted to her as my eye was drawn across the room to another woman. Eventually he tagged me into the conversation and the stunning brunette was Jessica Alba.

Within minutes of us chatting, she got very tactile and it was clear she was interested. She took her drinks and went back to her friends.

Long story short, during the rest of the evening, we kept bumping into each other, but I never took my chance. I woke this morning extremely frustrated. 

The dream really reminded me of the night I met Recruitment Bird for the first time. A similar thing happened, except I did take my chance that evening.

Planning

The thing about going out to the pub last Tuesday and the work party on Friday is that it's given me a taste again for going out, chilling with good company, having a few drinks and people watching.

KfW2 is back from her holidays, and we kinda agreed to do something when she came back. A day out with her kids, or an adult evening. I don't mind either way. I've posted before that I think her kids are great company. I would nearly always lean towards an adult evening out, given my lack of opportunity to do that these days, but I'll take anything at the moment.

Zzz.

I bought a new smartwatch at Xmas because I was planning on trying to up my exercise and lose some weight this year. I've also started keeping it on at night to track my sleep. I've been convinced that my sleep has been awful for a long time - years, in fact.

So over the past 2 weeks, apparently the average sleep I'm getting is just shy of eight hours a night. But it doesn't feel like that.

I'll need to dig into the details a bit more to see what the quality is like, and how exactly the smart watch is recording my sleep. There are still a lot of days where I wake and I feel awful. Today was one of them. Yesterday was not. But yesterday I supposedly got 9 hours.

These boots were made for walking.

I got a couple of drunken text messages from KfW2 last night, around midnight. I was already asleep, and only picked them up this morning. She must have been quite drunk because they made no sense. I texted back and eventually got a more detailed explanation out of her. Long story short: she was at a friend's house, got drunk and did an Irish Goodbye. We have our own slang for it.

She's massively hungover today, poor thing. 

Just talking.

The work event was great fun. Even Stalky Guy was less Stalky Guy than usual, which helped. I spent most of the evening chatting to Quiet Girl, though. Her friend didn't show up - she was travelling for work. 

Both QG and another woman, who comes out with us regularly, were quite tactile last night.  That's not unusual for the unnamed woman, but it is for Quiet Girl. She's a hugger, but never anything more. Until last night that is.

Other than that, nothing strange or startling occurred, but it was still a fun evening. Quiet Girl is always good company.

Answer me this.

The pub quiz was a fund raiser for my niece’s school's PTA. Disappointingly, it seemed that only my sister brought along extra people. The only other representatives were the PTA itself. They weren't the only ones in the quiz - it was a public bar, so plenty of non-associated people were there, so the numbers were good.

One of the PTA members was this super cute, petite, blonde woman, who looked roughly my age and drew my attention for a good portion of the evening, until I saw the wedding ring. Shame.

The quiz was great fun. I always enjoy a pub quiz. I'm not bad at them, but it's a team effort and we managed to come second, losing out on first place on the penultimate question. Still... 

Doing the do.

I dreamed of K last night. I don't know what prompted it, but in the dream, we never drifted apart after sleeping together and instead formed a great FwB thing. We'd visit each other every few months and do what FwBs do, and it was all very chill and fun.

There didn't seem to be a point or a conclusion to the dream. I woke before anything like that happened, if it was even going to, but my sleep quality last night was awful.

Great success!

Well, the good news is that I am hangover-free this morning, despite drinking from 3 PM until midnight, and having several sambucas and tequilas, courtesy of my nephew.

I'm still muggy in the head and I am literally only awake about 30 minutes. I'll need a lot of coffee today, and despite my lack of hangover, I'm still glad I took today off work.

I was also a little apprehensive about the party. The last time my sister hosted a party, I spent the entire evening feeling out of sorts: lonely and a couple of other, vague, unidentified feelings. That didn't happen this time around, and the party was great, so all-in-all a great success.

Cheers!

Double birthday party today and it's going to be a very drunken affair. I'm not looking forward to tomorrow, though I do have the day off work, just in case. I can't remember the last time I was drunk, properly drunk, not just tipsy drunk. The last time I was tipsy drunk was probably out with KfW2 for lunch and drinks a few months back.

But otherwise, I've not drank that much alcohol this year nor have I been out a lot. 

Who dis?

I was lying in bed this morning, browsing Reddit when I came across this picture: 

It's someone called Ava Moore, but I know nothing more than that other than she looks very pretty and gives me vibes of someone I know, but can't put my finger on.

Let's go.

Despite work being an absolute clusterfuck at the moment, I've just signed off for a long weekend. None of it is my fault, I was just managing the solutions, and I've left those in other, capable, hands.

After my trip to see Superman yesterday, I had toyed with going to see Fantastic Four today, but apathy has kicked in. I have a double birthday party to attend on Sunday, which might get messy, hence the day off on Monday. But it should be fun. 

Is it a bird?

I'm just back from seeing the new Superman film. It's not bad. Rachel Brosnahan is lovely though.

Planning ahead.

I think the loneliness is really kicking in at the moment. There are some social things happening soon, though not all of them are going to be "meeting new people" events. There is a pub quiz and a work thing, though the work thing will probably be spent most just bantering with Quiet Girl. I've not seen anyone at work in a long time who has piqued genuine interest.

There is, of course, Quiet Girl's friend, though I don't know if she's going to be in attendance this year nor can I say for certain that her interest was real, or if it was a drunken dream that masqueraded as a memory. And I don't know if I'm intrigued because of the uncertainty or if I am genuinely interested. I don't think I am. At least not in dating. Maybe something physical/casual? I don't know.

August is looking very quiet. I have extremely tentative plans with KfW2, but that's it, and I can't arrange anything until she comes home from holidays at the end of the month.

Wanderlust.

More desire, of a sort. Wanderlust has returned, presumably as a result of watch the video below: 24hrs Flying First Class from Australia to England. Partly driven by a desire to see E again, and possibly London Girl (see, I'm already semi-planning the trip in my head). And I'd love to do it first class, but do you know how much that would cost? £15,000. Fifteen grand! 

I wish I had the money where I could spend £15k on flights alone and not have to worry about anything.

Desire.

For some reason I woke up this morning with this desire to have a reunion of sorts with some Primary School friends. Only six people, though, including myself. The others consist of two guys (G and OSF) and the three women would be three women that I've blogged about before: one who reminds me of Cristin Milioti, a elfin-faced brunette woman (who was probably my first crush) and an athletic blonde (that everyone else seemed to crush on).

I've not seen any of the women in at least 20 years beyond Facebook posts from the latter two, but I have a gut feeling that it'd be a fun night out.

And I can't underestimate how strong this feeling was for the reunion. And before USHW pesters me elsewhere, no, I won't be reaching out to the women. I don't have contact details for OSF. I might give G a call though. It's long overdue. 

Heh.

I was trawling through some old emails earlier. I was looking for something related to FA2, though I can't actually remember what it was now. But I came across an email conversation with USHW that involved me making animal noises, which brought a smile. I'll not share the context.

Plans.

The end of the month is shaping up to be busy. I have a double birthday party to attend, a pub quiz and my work's summer party, with Quiet Girl. And I am wondering if QG's friend will show up, after last year's potential approach. I'm looking forward to it.

Stringing along.

Ages ago, I can't remember when, I blogged about QC3 wearing a strappy/stringy top but I could never find any pictures to show what I was trying (badly) to explain.

But today, I found this picture of Sarah Michelle Gellar that triggered a memory of that post and, well, here we are. These are the tops that QC3 used to wear... and wear well.

Lovely day.

I got another invite from my sister for another BBQ last night. I was quick to accept. The weather was glorious and I get on well with my sister. I've drank more in the past few days than I have in months. I'm feeling it a little today, but the weather's still nice so a couple of hours in the garden, chilling with a book will do the trick.

Pondering.

There was an outside chance that The Crowd were going to get together last night. As part of some messaging that was going on on Wednesday, FC suggested an impromptu meeting at CB Pub.

That would have worked in my favour. I could have done the walk with Nerdy Girl then met up with The Crowd afterwards.

But S was quick to cry off. to be fair, travelling to Bristol was a good excuse. GM though was another matter.

"Busy" He used more words, but that's what it boiled down to.

"Maybe we can schedule something in a few weeks?" I countered.

"Dunno, I don't get a lot of free time and I've just gotten a new puppy."

I get that people are busy, but that's the whole point of arranging something in the future, isn't it? To avoid conflicts. 

It kinda feels that he's avoiding any socialising [with us], and it's felt that way for some time. 

Next time.

I cancelled my walk with Nerdy Girl on Tuesday as I was feeling unwell. I had been feeling really queasy all day long. But we rescheduled for today. The weather was fantastic, so we did our walk and ended up, predictably, at CB Pub for a bite to eat and a drink. The pub was rammed.

I think the next time, we can definitely make an attempt at our original long-distance route.

Oh?

I wasn't looking forward to today. Without going into details, I was not expecting to hear from my sister, and that would mean she was putting in no effort on a day where, in my opinion, she should. A lack of effort would feed into my loneliness, and I've mentioned before that any time I see my sister, I'm the one making the effort.

But, no. I got a text message early from my sister inviting me to dinner, and that was a great start.

I was disappointed by KfW2's message, sent into one of our group WhatsApp chats instead of being sent directly. I never heard from G either, which is more than a little strange. But I also got a message from V, surprisingly. 

Tick.

I've been productive over the past few days, chalking off some tasks, hitting some personal goals and I'm feeling quite chuffed with myself.

My sleep continues to be awful.

But I'm due to meet with Nerdy Girl tonight for a walk. I'm looking forward to it because I've not seen her in weeks and the weather's great. While my foot injury is healed and I should make an attempt at our longer route, I'm more tempted by the shorter route and finishing at CB Pub for a drink and chat.

I can offset that by walking to and from CB Pub, just over a mile in each direction. 

Yeah. I'll do that. 

20 years.

Today is the 20th anniversary of the London bombings. A day that I spent trying to get a hold of G who worked and lived in London at that time. Luckily he was OK, but as a coincidence, that was a day he'd forgotten his phone and left it in the house. He walked past the scene of one of the bombings only 15 minutes earlier.

I also received a snotty message on MSN from K who seemed miffed that I'd not been trying to contact her to find out how she was.

"Yes, Ruuude. I'm fine. Nice of you to ask," was what she had messaged. Or at least that's close to it. She was nowhere near any of the trouble. I knew that. She knew that I knew that. ho hum. Women, eh?

Hurrah!

In a dramatic turn of events, the weather this coming week is meant to be great. That's in stark contrast to the forecast on Friday where it was meant to rain for most of the week. The reason that the weather is important is the fact that I've taken a week off work, and the good weather means that I can spend some time in the garden, chilling with a book.

I have other stuff I want to do (or at least start) this week, but the weather being good should help a little. Plus, who doesn't like sunny weather? 

Blast from the past.

It's SBF's birthday today, according to Facebook. I've not thought of her in ages. Her social media presence is practically zero and MMBF hasn't mentioned her in ages either. Nothing else worth noting, but Happy Birthday SBF. Still stunning looking.

Well suited.

I'm currently rewatching Elementary, the reimagining of Sherlock Holmes featuring Jonny Lee Miller and Lucy Liu. It's OK, but I just wanted to voice my appreciation for the range of trouser suits that Lucy Liu's Joan Watson wears. Regular readers to this blog will know that I love a woman in a good fitted trouser suit.

Do it.

The little time we spent chatting alone on Monday night has only really given me a taste for more. 

I should message KfW2 and suggest something, but it'd likely be August before we can even think about it because she's off to France with her family at the end of next week.

All I Really Want.

KfW2 was on time, but she arrived with friends. This wouldn't be an issue if we saw each other more frequently, but when we're only seeing each other a few times a year, our time is at a premium. However, they were nice, we had a couple of drinks then they went on their way to the gig. So minimal disruption to my plans, but disruption nonetheless.

KfW2 and I stayed on at CB Pub for another few drinks before we ambled down. The conversation was interesting once her friends left. She admitted something. Something that she was worried about, that was out of character for her, that she'd apparently not told her husband. My take was that it was concerning, but probably not as bad as she was making out. She seemed to take that on board.

She asked me if she'd lost weight. I replied "yes" instantly because I had noticed it and was wondering how to bring it up.

"I see it in your face a little, " I explained.

Not the whole truth. I think she was a little less... busty... than I remember, too.

The conversation carried on. KfW2 continues to surprise me by knowing what to say because she mentioned that she was glad I invited her to the gig, not just to see Alanis Morissette, but to spend time with me.

"I love the time we spend together," she shared.

 I reciprocated the sentiment. We both know, but it's always nice to hear (and share). I've been feeling quite lonely and isolated this year, so it's reassuring to have someone say that.

The gig was good, but could have been a little better. We got a decent view and the sound was amazing for an outdoor gig. But the set list was missing a good few of my favourite songs, sadly, and it felt a little impersonal due to there being no real interaction with the crowd.

By the end of the gig, we had to return to CB Pub to meet KfW2's friends so she could get a lift home. At this stage, my stomach was really starting to play up, so the final drink we got wasn't really sitting well with me.

But we parted ways as they went off to get food. I got a hug and another reminder that she loves my company.

And that was it... something I've been waiting over six months for.

And despite the fact I only had about 4 drinks last night, I feel like it was about 10. I should have taken today off and had a lie in. Oh... and it did rain a little, but not enough to put a dampener on the evening.

Let's go.

I called KfW2 last night to nail down arrangements for later, as I promised I would on Thursday. She didn't pick up. At the moment, I'm going to assume our tentative plans haven't changed: meet at CB Pub for drinks around 6:30, then head to the gig after an hour or so. That means me leaving the house shortly after 6 PM.

The weather has changed, but not improved. There are no longer warnings for thunderstorms, but the rain seems to be pretty persistent from the time I'm meant to leave the house.

And, as of this moment,  it looks like I've avoided CC inviting herself along. I'm pretty sure the weather is a factor here. Princess CC wouldn't want to get wet.

Well then.

I had a dream last night about a night that actually happened. I might have already blogged about it, but I wanted to type this up before the details fade away.

I was out at a pub, with BW plus AM, QC1 and their respective partners. An old flame of BW's was out as well. We were out to see the band I posted about over the weekend, at the bar where I met R2.

But the main memories of the night were that I spent most of the night dancing away with a friend of BW's ex-girlfriend. From memory, she was an attractive brunette woman with a great figure. In the dream, it was TV weather forecaster Lucy Verasamy.

Ultimately, just like real life, nothing came of it beyond a quick kiss and lots of knowing looks from AM and QC1. 

But now that I think back, my vague memory of the woman in question, I do get Lucy Verasamy vibes off of her. Is that the influence of the dream of did they have similar vibes from a physical perspective?

Weather with you.

Moving quickly on, I have another gig to attend tomorrow night, this time with KfW2 as my guest. Currently, the plan is to meet at CB Pub, have a few drinks then head to the gig. I'm calling her later to finalise the plans.

I've seen what's likely to be the setlist and I'm kinda disappointed, but I'm also still super excited. The weather's meant to be awful, too. I've been keeping an eye on the weather for a few days and despite it being changeable, it's stubbornly meant to be raining from mid-afternoon through to the end of the concert.

But still... an artist I've wanted to see for many years and some time out with KfW2? I can't wait. 

Ho hum.

Sadly, the gig tonight is sold out. I'm not sure how I feel about going to such a gig on my own, but I still would. I've been to much larger gigs by myself - music, comedy etc. so this wouldn't be out of the ordinary except for the size: a few hundred people, tops.

And Quiet Girl wasn't in touch either. So it looks like it's an evening on the sofa or gaming for me. 

Taps foot.

One of my favourite bands is playing tonight, in CB Pub. I tried to get M to go to it, but he's not in the city this weekend, sadly.

Additionally, Quiet Girl suggested she'd let me know where she was going this weekend. There's a music festival on with plenty of gigs across the city this weekend. We're both fans of the genre, so she said if she was heading to a gig, she'd let me know. I've not heard anything from here, though. Not yet, anyway.

If there are any tickets left, I might go to the gig by myself, you know. 

Oh la la!

It's the weekend. It's been a long week and so to celebrate, here are some old pictures of Gillian Jacobs and Alison Brie when they were in Community.

Schlurring.

For years, while it was never a competition, KfW2 always complained that I drank her under the table when we went out for our adult days out. That's true. My tolerance is much higher than KfW2's, especially when gin is the drink. But she always thought I was sober, too. I wasn't, of course, but seemingly I didn't give off that vibe and was able to chat without issue.

However,  the past two times I've spoken with KfW2 she's been quick to call out that I've been drunk. And correctly too. It might only have been five pints this afternoon, but seeing as I've not been in the pub and awful lot recently and I don't drink in the house on my own, my tolerance is really low.

"You're drunk."

"Am I?"

"Yes, I can hear it in your voice." She laughed.

I protested, but she was correct.  Not drunk, but definitely tipsy. Five beers on a mostly empty stomach will do that.

However, we did make tentative plans for Monday's gig. And that's a start.